Dear Brother, Sister, Parent, and Shadchan,
It seems these days, that finding a Shidduch is a lot harder than it was in the past. There are lots of young boys and girls out there that are getting older, and are still single. Parents are making calls, Shadchanim are making calls, but it just doesn’t seem to move. Aside from time it takes to make the calls and reach references, it takes lots of effort to properly evaluate prospectives and get 2 names in the same plate. When someone makes a call to a reference, they hear something they don’t like and the suggestion is closed. It is my firm belief that people don’t know how to evaluate other people properly and might mention some “major” aspect of a single that really only represents 5% of their total character and personality, but since that is all what the other side hears, they give it heavy consideration in their decision. How many good matches were prevented from going forward for this simple and foolish reason? Shidduchim should be investigated with the accuracy of a crime lab! We should not take some mindless-by-the-way remark someone said about another and consider as evidence good enough for a court. I plead and beg from whoever is involved in the shidduch making process to please take this heart. A brilliant cut diamond has 58 facets, how many does a person have?
Continued in the Extended Article.
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