Man Takes His Own Life After Daughter Isn’t Accepted By School

Hours after the apparent suicide of a Sefardi man in Israel, an area rabbi is pointing the finger of blame at the administrators of a local Chareidi school, saying that it was their refusal to accept the deceased’s daughter into their institution that drove him to take his own life.

From VIN News by Sandy Eller:

According to Israeli news site Kikar HaShabat, the niftar, who lived in the Rechasim settlement in Northern Israel, had just been advised yesterday morning that his daughter was not accepted into first grade.  Rechasim has over 1,800 families and received a low ranking on the socio-economic scale by the Israel Central Bureau of Statistics.  Several individuals, including prominent community members and rabbis in the settlement, have accused the school of playing a part in the man’s death.

“Those who support this city cannot say that they bear no responsibility for the blood that was spilled here,” Rabbi Yosef Gigi, a rosh kollel in Rechasim, said during this morning’s emotionally charged funeral, targeting his remarks squarely at the school’s administration.

Grieving residents echoed the same sentiment, telling one member of the school’s administration that he played a role in yesterday’s tragedy by not doing his part to accommodate the family’s difficult financial situation.

“This is a very sad story,” said Nati Chayak, a Shas representative of the Rechasim community council.  “For two months they tried to make arrangements for the daughter.  He tried to use all of his connections to get her into the school and unfortunately, he did not succeed.”

The name of the deceased was not released, but Chayak, who said he often worked with the father, described the story as “very painful.”

“He would take care of transportation in the yeshiva that I worked in and he worked for me steadily,”  said Chayak. “This time he didn’t share his situation with me, unfortunately.”

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14 Comments

  • Raizi A

    Let the vaad gashmi in CH understand What pressure they put on parents.
    Bldg fee
    Dinner fee
    Bus fee
    ETC
    Any Which way to make parents pay more. At the end of the day the school doesn’t evening pop at the teachers on time
    But the great vaad have 5-6 Sumner homes for all their kids.

    • Milhouse

      Who should pay for the school’s expenses, if not the parents? The va’ad?! Why should they pay for your child’s education? They already donate their time and hard work, and they already donate plenty of money too, what more do you want from them? Yes, they have nice things; they have earned them. Why do you envy what is rightfully theirs? Do you really think they should give away everything they have, so that you won’t have to reach deep into your own pocket to pay for your child’s schooling? Tell me why they should do such a thing.

    • @ Milhouse

      If the school can’t pay the teachers, the the administrators shouldn’t get paid either. It is totally illegal to withhold wages, and teachers can’t even get food-stamps when their checks are not forthcoming.
      Yes, when the admin does their job, they can get big salaries. But not at the expense of the educational standards and teachers salaries.

  • Shocked but not surprised

    I hope this school, and all others who reject children, bear the guilt for this man’s ultimate despair. Israeli schools play these terrible games with parents & in this case, drove a father to suicide.

    My friend’s daughters do not have a school that will accept them. They are good girls, one pushes the envelope a bit, School starts tomorrow and they are still home. My friend is at the end of her rope.In Israel, it’s quite common, but still unacceptable.

  • Very sad

    Kids in our community are rejected as well from schools. Isn’t it time the books of our schools are opened to see the truth ??? Country homes not one but multiple , houses being bought in ch for over a million dollars . And yasher koach to the teachers who remain strong still coming to work even though they are months and months behind . We should not tolerate this it is time the schools have a vaad , control the money pay the teachers and make sure no one is taking from the pot.it is the young generation who need to stand up to these people they are our future. What are we teaching our children?

  • teacher

    what is the reason she was not accepted? If it is financial, then there is much more financial problems in the family. How is he paying rent, food etc? this then should be addressed by “a community chesed organization.”
    If it is tznius of the parents as many schools in Israel do not accept children where there is no standards, parents have to conform or know that they are giving up on the certain schools. The school has a right to demand certain standards from the homes that kids are accepted.

  • A Crown Heights Chosid

    Millhouse you are a contravercial tummler. Do you have seven, eight or so kids in our yeshiva system?No matter how much tuition you are going to pay that won’t be enough to cover school expenses. Did you ever hear of fundraising? Would you like parents to fundraise after they come home from their morning job? Don’ t tell me that the hanholah of Bais Rivkah didn’t get paid in five months! Nobody is jealous of their summer and winter homes. Use gezungterheit – but please don’t choke anyone either! Gut gebentsht yahr to all.

  • Nebach

    I feel terrible that this person felt he had no options. May his family know no more hardships.
    Lately I’ve been so depressed at our financial situation, I’m scared of losing our home, the car, there’s some weeks I have to stretch out food and toiletries. The immense guilt I feel for wanting to send my kids to public school. My monthly tuition bill is higher than majority of my bills. I struggle to choose which bills to ignore. I don’t know if I’m doing the right thing. To keep my family in poverty, just barely surviving but they go to a frum school or to be able to move out of a tiny apt, end the collections calls but be a pariah for sending my kids to public school or less religious school?

  • suicide = Mental health

    Suicide is an unfortunate mental health illness. The denial MAY have been triggered it. However traggic, it is NOT the cause.
    The cause was the illness.
    May hashes give his familythe sstrength to get through this difficult time.

  • Real role model for our kids

    A role model Chossid collected maamad in a Lubavitcher community for many years. He lived in the most simple of homes, and purposely did not do anything to make people talk about him using public funds. (he didn’t use them, of course). He and his wife worked, and they could have afforded to live a drop better, but he was scrupulous in his achrayus as a person in the public eye.

  • Rebecca

    No it is no one’s fault but his own.
    Don’t blame others.
    His daughter should be in a school that wants her.
    Why try to cram her in a place where she will feel rejection all the time?