Letter: To the Person Who Vandalized My Sister’s Picture

Recently, Menachem Roetter hung up a flyer in a Chabad Shul in the Detroit area inviting the community to join his family in honoring the memory of his sister, Pesha Leah, who passed away six years ago in a terrible car accident. A few days later, he stopped by the Shul and was shocked to discover that the sign had been vandalized – the photo of his sister had been torn out.

Deeply pained by the incident, Menachem wrote the following open letter to whoever was responsible, which was originally published on The Torch from MyJewishLearning.com:

Dear whoever did it,

I do not know who you are, and quite frankly, I don’t care.

I must ask, why did you do this? Did you think it is wrong for a woman to be on a poster? Perhaps you wanted to “save others” from getting aroused by a picture of a woman? WHY?!? Do you really believe it is appropriate to remove women’s faces from signs? How could you do such a thing and not worry about the consequences?

The flyer next to it had a clipart picture of a mother and daughter lighting Shabbos candles on it. Why didn’t you remove that one too? Most Chabad families have pictures of the Rebbetzin hanging in their homes. Should we rip those down too?

You did not just vandalize a flyer, you vandalized my heart. By ripping a picture of my sister off the bulletin board, you made a statement: This person does not belong in our community. But it is YOU who does not belong! My sister was a role model of Chabad. She taught me for my Bar Mitzvah, and she taught me what it means to be a chossid and a follower of the Lubavitcher Rebbe. She taught me what it means to treat everyone as an equal. During her short years on this earth, she touched hundreds of souls all around the world, teaching them about what it truly means to be a Jew. Unfortunately, it seems she may have missed you.

By removing women’s pictures from things, you destroy an integral part of Judaism. Women make us into a nation because it is the mother that determines the child’s religion, not the father. It was the women who kept the Jewish people going throughout our exile in Egypt and it was the women who helped tip the tide in the war against the Greeks.

My sister lived by the verse, “Ashrainu, ma tov chelkeinu, u’ma naim goroleinu, u’ma yafa y’rushoteinu – We are fortunate, how goodly is our lot, and how pleasant is our fortune and how beautiful our heritage.” But our heritage comes from both genders. We are equally descendants of Avraham, Yitzchok, and Yaakov AS WELL AS Sarah, Rivkah, Rochel, and Leah… Don’t you think it is time to acknowledge that?

My sister also taught me that everyone has their own struggles in life, and no one truly knows what another person deals with. She taught me to always give others a second chance. But you cannot give someone a second chance without first forgiving them for their first chance. Forgiveness brings achdut, unity. So in honor of her yahrtzeit, I forgive you. I doubt you will ever see this letter, but if you do, I want you to know that I am hurt by your actions but I forgive you in the hope that you can learn from this incident. I know I have.

85 Comments

  • Menachem Roetter (author)

    i would like to post an update.
    first off, the rabbi of the shul has told my family he will try to check the security cameras to find the culprit.

    also, my family had hung up this letter in the shul the friday of the kiddush. after maariv, once a few members of the shul had read it, the gaabi took it down because he says there could have been multiple reasons someone did it (such as one should not post pics of a person who has passed away), and i only addressed one of them.

    • menachem to the press!

      Wow the rabbi is going to be sooo busy now with ” Trying To get the video” maybe he will prove himself to be there as a rabbi for the community. Finally doing something with his day

    • picaboo shimon

      the gabbai said ‘ one should not post pics of a person who has passed away’

      however we have pictures of the rebbetzin posted everywhere?

    • Adin unasbog

      Please don’t make these battles bigger than they are.

      Pictures of women in publications is a halachic discussion. The Rebbe wanted Tzivos Hashem magazines to include girls in the cover and at the same time when a Shliach showed the Rebbe a camp flyer with a girl not tznius, the Rebbe told him to change it.

      Actually there is a letter from Rabbi Tziner to the Rebbe about the Rebbetzins picture and the Rebbe gave heterim why it’s allowed. One is that it was black and white and the other was that because she is not living, the yetzer hara doesn’t have dominion and her picture will only arouse pity…

      No extremism either way please, some Shuls care less about standards and others will destroy that which shouldn’t be. Of course it could of been a kid not knowing what the sign said just playing around…

  • someone who loves you

    Menachem,

    I am sorry that such a disgraceful thing happened to your poster and sorrier still with your reaction prompted by “friends” of yours who are a terrible influence.

    Your sister was an amazing person and was also extremely logical. If there was a untouched picture of a woman directly next to the torn poster, wouldn’t that make you think that perhaps this (and other issues) is not necessarily a Gender issue?

    There are plenty of reasons ranging from stupid to cruel for someone to have ripped the picture. While none of them are good reasons, most make a lot more sence then the leap you took.

  • Not Chabad

    Unfortunately that Shul has NO leadership- and don’t bring Chabad in as it’s not under Chabad

    • Milhouse

      The shul has a rov who is a talmid chochom. And it is just as much a Chabad shul as any other. It’s not “under” anything but its roof, because it’s a one-floor building. But the ground floor is Chabad, and if it had a second floor that would be Chabad too.

    • JJ

      How dare you?!!!
      Regardless of leadership its a place of kedusha. A shul where CHABAD Chassidim daven and learn.
      Hashem should only bless those that are involved and work tirelessly for the shul with abundance for them and their families.
      May Pesha Leah’s Neshama have an aliya.

    • Who's this rabbi In Detroit?

      True: anyone looking for a position as a rabbi that is competent and can get along with other leaders in the city? Apply within

  • Chilul Lubavitch

    That mushroom Shul you are talking about most people left werner only lunatics of the community go there. Dont make a chilul Lubavitch from a place that’s not under Luvavitch –

    • Milhouse

      Mushroms are tasty. Rabbi Werner is a talmid chochom and a chossid. And if anyone has left their absence is not noticeable. It is certainly a Lubavitcher shul; there is no requirement that such shuls be “under” anyone.

    • K

      Bais Chabad Shul of North Oak Park, Michigan IS under Rabbi Shea Werner, just as Chabad West Bloomfield IS under Rabbi Elimelech Silberberg and Chabad Oak Park, Farmington Hills IS under Rabbi Chaim Moshe Bergstein.

      Rabbis Werner and Silberberg both serve their kehillos and are not under anyone’s fiefdom or hierarchy.

    • to K

      The problem with Werner or any mushroom is people might think that what he does or says “represents” Chabad when in fact he is not accepted by aguch as a sheliach.

    • Milhouse

      They do represent Chabad, as much as any chossid does, and as much as any observant Jew represents Klal Yisroel. They don’t represent Merkos or Aguch, and they don’t claim to. Nor do any of the shuls in Crown Heights. For that matter nor did any of the Nusach Ari shuls that used to be so common in America.

    • to Milhouse

      Werner was never delisted as a sheliach. he has pleaded to be a sheliach and for whatever reasons they never accepted him although rabbi Werner tells people he is when he uses his fathers ticket to get into the minus. Rabbi silberberg is in a much different position, he was always a sheliach never delisted as much as they would want to they know he is doing good for the community so they never delisted him even if they are in court for other reasons.

    • Milhouse

      The reason Rabbi Werner is not listed is very simple: he’s not so insane as to put his life in Berel’s hands, and the board of the shul he leads is not willing to give Berel title to the property. (I don’t even know whether they could give it away if they wanted to. If I were the donor I would make sure the deed was worded so that it couldn’t be given away without my consent.) In other words it’s the same issue as Rabbi Silberberg has. And it’s the same reason Hendel Weingarten is not listed, even though he’s Berel’s cousin, and is doing the Rebbe’s shlichus, but he refuses to give Berel the title to his Chabad House and become his eved kenaani.

  • Well intended

    While the sentiments in this article are understood, you can’t let your feelings get in the way of halacha and instructions of gedolei yisroel. I’m not saying that halacha would demand taking down the sign. But rather that they shun having pictures of women in public places. There is a reason why kfar chabad magazine never had a picture of women, including the rebbetzin. The israeli chabad websites as well.

    • Anonymous

      Milhouse there is a reason to specify when a rabbi or organization is not recognized by the Chabad movement that what ever goes on or is done should not give all “Chabad” a negative name. There needs to be Law and order just as you wouldn’t want people saying halacha in your name – this is the case anywhere you could be a self proclaimed “talmud chacham” however if you are not under the establishment don’t preache as if you are.

    • Milhouse

      Being a Lubavitcher shul does not imply that one represents anyone. Nor does it require that one be “recognized” by anyone. Are the shuls in Crown Heights not Lubvitcher shuls, just because they don’t kowtow to one dictator or another?!

    • Milhouse

      Today someone may be listed on chabad.org, and tomorrow they may be delisted, as the whim takes those who run the list. Shluchim who have the Rebbe’s kesav yad kodesh describing them as shluchim, and even as “head shluchim”, have been delisted when they didn’t bow kor’im to the dictators. It doesn’t mean anything. Rabbi Silberberg may very well be heading for a delisting, but I don’t think the Rebbe will stop considering him a shliach.

    • To milhouse

      It seems you know alot of nothing about Detroit. Rabbi Shemtov Disent need this building or need Werner as a rabbi (he is working on bringing a more qualified rabbi to represent the Chabad community of 10 mile – shemltov has the most beautiful yeshiva building right next door. – Werner keeps harassing Shemtov to be a sheliach or at least let him come to the kinnus so don’t make up things about Shemtov wanting that crappy building no Chabad house in Michigan does Shemtov Have the title! hendel story is totally different.

    • Milhouse

      You are the one making things up. Berel insists that he must have the title to every Chabad mosad in the state, and if you don’t give it to him you can’t be a shliach. That’s what the whole fight with Rabbi Silberberg is about. Berel is demanding the title to the shul, and the board sees no reason to give it to him, so he’s taking it out on the rabbi, as if it’s his to give away. And that is the issue with Hendel too. Once Berel has the building’s title, your life is in his hands.

  • Unfortunate

    You are correct and feel for you and much els you may be going threw however Werner is not a sheliach why badmouth Chabad? For something has NOTHING to do with Chabad??

    • Mom

      Why give a name in public for spreading Loshon hora? I don’t know any of thes people and I don’t need to know… And now I know a name because you posted it. This story is terrible, but it doesn’t seem that a fitting tribute to pesha Leah’s neshama is a Lashon hara campaign

  • Mar Zutra

    We Jews have a Book Called Shulchan Aruch

    and We Jews Dont Hang Pictures Of Women in A Shul.

    • Milhouse

      Are these meant to be two unrelated statements? Or are you claiming that such a practice is found somewhere in the Shulchon Oruch? If so , where?

    • Mom

      Removing the whole sign might be more appropriate then. Ripping out part of it with a persons face is cruel

  • Another view

    Obviously I have no clue who/why would do this. But think about this. Your sister was so special that even though I never knew her my heart hurt at her loss.
    Maybe this was someone who knew her, someone who missed her so much that they didn’t realize how selfish they were being and what hurt they would cause – because all they wanted was to have the special picture of her. Sure, they could have got it in other ways – but maybe this was an impulsive act etc. from someone who loved her very much?

  • Nechama

    Pesha Leah A”H’s beautiful insights into the relationship between Shluchim and those working for them has been an inspiration to me since the first time I read them. May her neshama have an aliyah.

  • Idea

    If for any reason a person did not like the fact that there was a pic of her, they could’ve just told the rabbi or someone in charge to plz take it down for this reason……….

  • Stop the Offense

    Can we take a moment to stop feeling “offended” and “hurt” by things we don’t like? Can we stop pulling the “victim” card every time we make a point?
    If yoh have a valid point to make, then you don’t need to play on peoples emotions and feelings to feel bad for you.

    • K

      Now we know what this is REALLY all about!

      (1) JOFA is a FEMINIST organization, and the oxymoron is that it claims to be “orthodox” while feminist organizations battle orthodox and traditional Torah values.

      (2) Sharon Weiss-Greenberg currently serves as the Director of Recruitment for Yeshivat Maharat – a “yeshiva” which ordains (gives smicha) to women to serve as rabbits.

      (3) She “asked (or begged)” the author to write this piece to promote HER anti-Torah and anti-Halacha agendas.

      (4) A vulnerable author was used and taken advantage of to exploit an emotional sensitive situation.

      (5) This has nothing to do with anything else other than attacking traditional Torah and Halacha.

      I hope this clarifies the REAL story behind the story.

  • chaim

    a neshama feels everything which is going on in this world. We need to be careful about dishing out Ain Horas on the shul, mispallim, or chabad or mushroom. We all have the achrius to be think twice in life before we do anything…her neshama should have an aliyas neshama for kallel yisroel

  • A "Lunatic" Member of that Shul

    Here it is, Yud Shevat, this most auspicious day for Chabad Chassidim. And instead of attaching themselves to the central theme of Ahavas Yisrael, some of the above commentators would rather focus on Pirud–divisiveness and judgment of fellow Jews–both forbidden. I wonder if there is a political agenda from other local factions. The remarks against the “lunatics” who daven there are revolting and lacking in dignity and respect. Sorry, these remarks are ignorant and condescending. Good thing I didn’t run into people like you 35 years ago or I may have fled from embracing Chabad Chassidus. “Mushrooms” and who is “under Chabad.” Get real. These are political machinations. The leaders of this shul are true shluchim of the Rebbe who give themselves over 100%. I wonder if any of their harsh critics are even fit to tie the shoes of these wonderful people. By the way, I am a respected professional in my field, and hardly consider myself to be a “lunatic!!” Happy Yud Shevat and bury your petty issues so that we can all welcome Moshiach!

  • No Minyan

    I was looking for a minyan on a Sunday morning in Detroit I asked where Chabad was and told to go to this place and there was no minyan and no rabbi – i Dident realize that next door was the Chabad yeshiva. Anyway I went to babayav Chabad Shul it was full with all type of yidin was really nice to see other chasidim and litvaks come to a Chabad minyan rabbi babayav was very involved and welcoming. That was my experience.

  • Anonymous

    I feel sorry for the author of this letter–it’s sad that he is hurting..
    but see what happens when we publicize these incidents?
    it only creates more controversy.
    it’s unfortunate – but such is the nature of people.
    Everyone feels they need to voice their opinions and feelings and it’s never ending.
    now is the time for Achdus
    and if you are not finding it in one room just go to the next one and keep going until we will have lots of achdus and merit Moshiach’s arrival.
    We can’t win em all … we didn’t when the Yidden left Egypt…….but we got enough to merit our redemption then … now we must strive for the same.

  • To "lunatic"

    Hey lunatic Is this article purpose from the member of your Shul meant to spread ahavas Yisroel? Is that why it’s on ch.info??? Is this how your thought in your Shul to rip out faces you don’t like in detroit ?
    I’m sure his sister was a wonderful person however Something does not seem healthy to me coming out of your Shul. Glad I never was there

    • A "Lunatic" Member of that Shul

      It’s hard to make any comment at all on what you said above because the language and grammar are so poor that I have no idea what you mean!! The issue that is so not “healthy” is that certain commentators have bashed a shul, its members and rabbi. That is Loshon Hara in the highest degree.

  • Eli

    In general Menachem thinks he’s above the law which rov did you consult with before hanging the notice up? Which beis din did you go to about denouncing this in public.

  • Anonymous

    Menachem, you are a beautiful thinker and writer. May your sisiter’s neshama have an Aliya.

  • Mendel w.

    Pharaoh wanted to kill all the male babies, and we (in the name of halacha) want to kill all the females

  • Larry

    To Mur zutra if you’re a member of that’s facility I can only imagine the attitude of the people of that place wouldn’t it have been very easy to take it off if it was inside And just place it on the outside if that’s a concern for you?

  • K

    Hold on a minute EVERYONE!!!

    Read the comment the author wrote:

    “Menachem Roetter (author) wrote:
    id like to sincerely thank Sharon Weiss-Greenberg of JOFA, for asking me to write down my thoughts about it. i would not have put finger-to-keyboard, and written such an inspiring piece, if she had not asked (or begged) me to…”

    Now we know what this is REALLY all about!!!!

    (1) JOFA is a FEMINIST organization, and the oxymoron is that it claims to be “orthodox” while being a feminist organization which battles orthodox (Halacha) Judaism and traditional Torah values.

    (2) Sharon Weiss-Greenberg currently serves as the Director of Recruitment for Yeshivat Maharat – a “yeshiva” which ordains (gives smicha) to women to serve as rabbits. (Note: Again the oxymoron of smicha – an expertise in halacha, to women to serve as rabbis contrary to halacha).

    (3) She “asked (or begged)” the author to write this piece to promote HER anti-Torah and anti-Halacha agenda. (Note: It succeeded in gaining sympathy and support even here – on a frum website!).

    (4) A vulnerable author was used and taken advantage of to exploit an emotional sensitive situation. (Note: He thinks he is taking a stand for his sister’s kovod, instead he is fighting for the feminist battle against Torah!).

    (5) This has nothing to do with anything else other than attacking traditional Torah and Halacha. (The whole issue about the sister is a “red herring” – the feminist couldn’t careless about her, all they want is to promote their agenda!).

    I hope this clarifies the REAL story behind the story.

    • Menachem Roetter (author)

      For your information, Sharon and I are FRIENDS.

      She asked me AS A FRIEND to write down my feelings because she saw that i was hurt by what happened and she believes i am a good writer.

      She did NOT ask me to publish it, simply to write it for myself.

      My mother and I decided to let it go viral, because there are people who would appreciate the message of achdus and forgiveness that it says.

      So please don’t assume things….

    • K

      Claim: Director of Recruitment of rabbits Sharon Weiss-Greenberg asked that author should write it for himself.

      Claim: This lady from JOFA dis not ask him to publish it.

      Claim: Author and his mother decided on their own to let it go viral.

      Claim: The purpose of publicizing was “there are people who would appreciate the message of achdus and forgiveness that it says.”

      FACT: Article was written and published on JOFA’s blog “The Torch”.

      Fact: Author or his mother do not control editorial content of “The Torch” – the rabbit recruiter does!

      Fact: The purpose of JPFA is to undermine our mesorah, undermine Torah/Halahic values and battle gedolei yisroel. Its call for battle stands for the opposite of achdus and forgiveness.

      Fact: I am not assuming, just calling it as I see it.

      Fact: Author was used as a toll by feminist to propogate their agenda.

      Fact: These feminist do not care about author or his sister. They will use and abuse the author and his sister’s memory to gain a step in their attempt to fight yiddishkeit and our rich mesorah.

      Fact: That does not bring honor to the sister’s memory. That is a far greater desecration of her name than merely tearing her picture!

  • Who's this rabbi In Detroit?

    Why can’t this Rabbi Werner handle the situation in his Shul without this small pathetic issue to be leaked all over the world with stupidity?! Whether he is a sheliach or not? Gosh in my Shul The candy man never gives me a candy !!! Will crown heights help me??

  • picaboo shimon

    now that jofa is involved this whole situation is ridiculous. I would rip down a womans picture too if it was on a jofa poster

    • Menachem Roetter (author)

      it was not a JOFA event. it was not a JOFA poster.JOFA had absolutely nothing to do with it…

      *shaking my head*

  • Would have been better

    You are very hurt by your sister’s death. But it would have been far better to put this letter in the shul where this happened instead of making it public for the whole world to see. Perhaps a child ripped it? We are not allowed to overmourn according to the Torah. Do a positive action for your sister – according to the above comments, there is disunity in the community – today was yud Shevat – have people connect to the Rebbe more – get the shuls near you to be under the shluchim the Rebbe appointed – why make such disunity and all under the name of Chabad? It seems like a lot of people recognized how lofty a person your sister was – do something positive for her neshomo – connect more to the Rebbe and get others to, also; the Rebbe knew what he was doing and whom he was appointing to be our leaders before and after gimel Tamuz. For the sake of your sister, you can help bring this unity. May all our mourning stop and Moshiach come now and we will see the Rebbe once again.

  • Hakhel

    Maybe for something positive for your sister, make hakhel gatherings for the children if a child ripped it. Make hakhel gatherings for all the people in your community if there is disunity. iThis is the year of unity of hakhel Keep the unity and please keep the websites empty of disunity.

  • To Menachem:

    Your article is heartfelt and sincere. Your family
    is wonderful. But it does seem like the jofa woman
    will take advantage of your unfortunate circumstance.
    Her motives don’t seem as genuine as yours. Beware.

  • K

    A further few word to author:

    Your sister died in a horrific car accident while returning from a mitzva of attending a friend’s wedding. That was her final act in Olom Hazah.

    Your family was making a Kiddush in her memory. To make a Kiddush is a kiddush Hashem and a zchus for her. We say of her: Of Blessed Memory – that her memory is a blessing to her and all of us.

    Why would you drag your sister into the feminist movement and make her into some “poster child” of JOFA?

    Is that a Kiddush Hashem or quite the opposite?

    Do you believe that adds honor to her memory or quite the opposite?

    Are you doing an action consistent with “Of Blessed Memory” or quite the opposite?

    I sympathize with your pain and loss and the need to vent about the defaced poster you placed in a shul (without receiving prior authority of the shul), but at some point you must question:

    Does venting about it, and being used as a tool for anti-mesora movements add or detract to your sister’s honor?

    Does your knee-jerk reaction and short-term feel good justify dragging your sister’s memory into controversy, loshon hara about the shul / chabad (and I am by no means a friend of either)?

    Is this how you want your sister to be remembered and identified?

    Do you think your actions are a zchus for your sister or quite the opposite?

    Here is a suggestion: Learn a daf gemmorah in her zchus. I assure you her neshoma will appreciate it far more than an article for the feminist movement who ordain rabbits in “Yeshiva” Maharat!

    Think about it!

  • Chaim 613

    I was not aware it is against halacha to hang photos of a woman.

    I was paid to hang posters all over crown heights to publicize chof beis shvat events in the community and the posters had the rebbetzins photo on it. I can’t believe I did such a big aveirah. I ask Hashem to forgive me. I will rip down all the posters today and never do it again.

  • a sheliach comes with a responsibility

    A big difference -when a rabbi in ch is not a sheliach – in a city like Detroit when you are in the midst of all type of other Jews and they see how a “Chabad” rabbi acts they might think that he represents all of Chabad rabonim when in fact he does not – being a sheliach comes with a responsibility, if he is not willing to accept that then theirs something wrong. That’s my view as a detroiter

    • Pedant

      Stop it, Berel, just stop. You don’t own the world and you aren’t the boss of me.

    • Toshov Hashchuna

      To “a sheliach comes with a responsibility”:

      Indeed, “they see how a “Chabad” rabbi acts they might think that he represents all of Chabad rabonim ” when they see how Rabbi Berl Shemtov harasses a kehilah in secular court trying to steal their building, does this also represent all Chabad rabonim?

      I hope not!

    • Milhouse

      And if he bows kor’im to Berel, suddenly he will represent all of Chabad rabbonim?! Is that the sine qua non of a chossid, that he enriches Berel’s real estate portfolio?!

    • K

      To paraphrase the mishna in Avos (5:2):

      There are four types of shluchim –

      one who does but doesn’t allow others;

      one who doen’t do himself but delegates to others;

      one who lives and let live;

      one who does not do himself yet invests his time, efforts and money to make sure others don’t do either.

      Which of these represent the raison d’être of Berl Shemtov?

    • Toshov Hashchuna

      K, that is the funniest comment I ever saw! You know, for a kalteh snag, you have a sense of humor – in a toradig way.

    • Kop Doktar

      You don’t make any sense!

      Mr. K, how is one a shaliach if “one who does not do himself…and makes sure others don’t do either” – he does nothing and makes sure others do nothing, so what makes him a shaliach????

      I shlogged op your pshetel!!

  • Berel

    Here is how to fix this situation. Hire an airplane to fly over the shul and drop leaflets with the girls picture on it.

  • Menachem Roetter (author)

    I NEED TO SAY SOMETHING:

    I am completely HORRIFIED by the amount of lashon hara that these comments have spewed!!

    My letter had NOTHING to do with Beis Chabad of North Oak Park, or Rabbi Werner, except for the fact that the incident happened to take place there…

    The article was NOT written to smudge my shul or its rabbi. It was written so people can realize just how deeply a family can get hurt by a simple action.

    BCNOP is MY shul, and I am a PROUD member there. I am very upset to see people judging it and putting down my rabbi. It completely misses the point of my letter: achdus and ahavas yisroel.

    I shared my thoughts and feeling so that my sister Pesha a”h could schep in nachas from the achdus it showed. and many people did appreciate it. However the amount of sinas chinum it brought out is very disheartening…

    Rabbi Werner was equally hurt when he heard the flyer was torn, Pesha was very close with the Werner family.

    Also I MUST point out: every Thursday night my shul is opened to the ENTIRE DETROIT COMMUNITY to sit down and enjoy good food. So it is extremely likely (and my original assumption) that whoever ripped the sign was NOT from chabad, nor a member of the shul.

    Rabbi Werner, I want to sincerely apologize for any discomfort that you, or your wife and family, may have had as a result of this post and its comments. I did not intend for it to be taken in this way and I’m sorry. My family and I thank you for doing your best in trying to find the culprit (I understand the security cameras do not face that area) and we appreciate all that your family has done for us over the years.

    May Pesha Leah bas Chaim Leibel’s Neshamah have an aliya.

    Good Shabbos,
    Menachem Roetter

    • K

      I am much older and wiser in Torah than you.

      Wipe away the tears…your sister would want joy. Simcha poretz geder. Joy lifts the soul and makes the spirit soar. Yet no soul can bear the crushing weight of sadness while the spirit drowns in tears.

      It’s sad when someone you know becomes someone you knew.

      You have a choice: Your sister can remain someone you know. Or – someone you knew.

      Nevertheless, treasure the warm memories of the gift you had, while holding tightly to the treasure in hand.

      Finally, associate her blessed memory with our glorious mesorah and immediately rectify and disassociate her name from anti-Torah values such as JOFA which neither bring her honor or respect.

    • Toshov Hashchuna

      Wow, K.
      I never thought of you as being sentimental.
      I guess even a cold misnaged has some internal varemkeit.

    • Crown Heightser

      Please do not call K a snag. We should be mekarev him. I even heard a rumor that K learns Samech-Vov and Ayin-Bais with Milhouse.

  • To menachem

    The negative comments seamed to come from people frustrated with the rabbi and your article just gave all of them an opportunity to vent. However I attend the Shul (when enofgh people come to the minyan) and it seams you are trying to hard to paint a beautiful picture about it, the Shul rents out the hall to a caterer that sells food in Thursday night NOT like you Portray all is so beautiful in your Shul “every Thursday night my shul is opened to the ENTIRE DETROIT COMMUNITY to sit down and enjoy good food.” Why is the rabbi on vacation every time I come? I deal for the chabadnics that are commenting here and grasping for some leadership if only they would come to the other many shuls in the area like the other Chabad families have. They would realize the positive community Detroit really is!

  • Anonymous

    As a toshev in Detroit I was sent this link. I must add something and sum this all up in my own words.
    All if you complaining about rabbi Werner, if you don’t like him there are many other qualified and fully accepted rabonim with shuls here along with nusach ari sidurim for when you guys come Friday nights… Detroit has become very diverse in the past few years as all types of chasidim moved here and is “warming up” it seams that Werner is really trying to hard to be everything including a therapist in Most people’s opinion that is extremely dangerous when “rabbi plays Doctor” he’s obviously for a number of reasons not qualified as a rav for a kahal like the other rabonim in Detroit. However Why unload your dirty laundry in public? As a non Chabad we would not shame our own community.
    I wish for this community to find their fully accepted Rav that can only bring you to higher levels of kedusha

  • Detroiter

    Silberberg has done great wonders not only for his community but for all Detroit.
    Shemtov is not trying to take his building just cuz he wants real estate. Is Shemtov fighting for hendels building? No is he fighting for any others? No! His simple reason is just like any other boss in any corporation he has his reason and RIGHT to fire an employee. No we don’t know his reasons! And his reasons go back many years. The building is just a tool.. You think he would just leave a community with out a rabbi? He would probably let silberberg stay there only difference would be is Shemtov would have control (in what he is entitled to as a boss) he spent much more money on lawyers then the building is worth!

  • Non Chabad yid

    If any company or organization like Red Cross would have a location that is not meeting their specifics that they set in place they would go to court then they would win all the assets of that location! They have energy right if they were getting funds under “Red Cross” that local shmedric can’t do or say what ever he wants under the Red Cross. Why does anyone think differently in Chabad? Yes it’s sad the guy worked his whole life but in the real world that’s how it works. People get fired all the time! So the guy goes and puts the assets into someone else’s name, so he’s playing around… Because he knows that Chabad WOULD be entitled to its assets. Shemtov and the new Shemtov administration is not looking for any trouble people and you will see every head sheliach is working on setting up the same way.
    I’m not taking sides here I’m just a pusheter yid that came across this blog and I financially support both of them.
    I would not support someone that is not backed by a global administration.

    • Milhouse

      Utter garbage. People give money to the West Bloomfield shul and to the Chabad shul on Ten Mile because they support those institutions and their respective rabbis, not because they support Berel Shemtov. If they wanted to give to Berel they would send the money directly to him.

      Nobody “put the assets in someone else’s name”. The assets never belonged to Berel in the first place. The baleibatim in West Bloomfield bought the property for themselves, not for Berel. And Mr Meer didn’t buy the radio station for Berel either. If he wanted it he could have raised the money and bought it himself.

      I would not support someone that is not backed by a global administration.

      That’s garbage. 99% of shuls in the world are not “backed by a global administration”.

  • Milhouse

    The issue is very simple: The Lubavitcher ballebatim who live in the Ten Mile area had the right to establish a shul for themselves without Berel’s permission. He is not their boss. They got the money together, they organized the purchase, they hired a rov, and since it is a Chabad shul what else should they call it? They are no different from any shul in Crown Heights, and they don’t need anyone’s permission to exist.

  • Hello milhouse

    I dont know who you represent. However I heard about this thread in (another )Shul over shabbos. Werner was not hired by the community. (Only by kasle ) the community does not support him including the wealthy -the community can go with out somoene claiming to be the “rabbi” true The community does not need Shemtov -and reading your coment about the rabbi being a “Talmud chacham” well he must have learned it all wrong if he can’t control his temper and stir negativity between couples. Selling himself claiming to be a therapist (which he is NOT) Your obviously a family member of his to keep coming back on to write so many coments as I see. however if you want to help him then find him a community that will actually support him and that will give him the kavod he so desperately demands like a 4 year old. And for the record this record rabbi Werner can only get a minyan On shabbos mainly people in walking distance. during the week no minyan – the litvish Kolel has a minyan of Lubavitchers -as much as he goes begging people to daven by him we just don’t like him.

  • Menachem Roetter (author)

    I’d like to publicly thank the rabbis of my shul for continuing to look into this. This week they figured out who it was that ripped the photo. I didn’t ask for a name, but it was s/o (not a shul member) who felt a woman’s picture should not be displayed. Thank you for taking so much time to find out who it was and why. My family appreciates it