In response to the recent op-eds on CrownHeights.info, a resident emailed us a letter addressed to the whole community. She reminds everyone, as Lubavitchers we must love every Jew, whether we understand or agree with them.
Love Your Fellow Crown Heightser As Yourself!
In response to the recent op-eds on CrownHeights.info, a resident emailed us a letter addressed to the whole community. She reminds everyone, as Lubavitchers we must love every Jew, whether we understand or agree with them.
Dear Friends,
This is a response to some recent op-ed pieces dealing with issues in the Crown Heights community. There are many intelligent and talented people who can address those issues, I will not attempt to do so here. But it is important to remember what the Lubavitch attitude is when it comes to solving problems.
The position and opinion of our Rebbe is clear. We have an obligation to love every Jew. Every single one. Although he’s far from me, across the widest sea. In the Rebbe’s first sicha to us he connected ahavas yisroel with ahavas Hashem. “If someone loves Hashem” he said, “but does not have ahavas yisroel, it is a siman that he does not truly love Hashem”. In the last sicha that we merited to hear (l’eis atoh) he spoke about it as well. I think it’s safe to say he spoke about it thousands of times.
I don’t recall ever hearing an “exception” to this policy. Nowhere in Likutei Sichos, to my knowledge, is there a footnote that ‘qualifies’ this mitzvah – that makes it contingent on one’s being from a non-frum background or behaving in a certain way.
If we call ourselves Lubavitchers one thing must be clear. Every Jew is welcome, every Jew is loved. Not because they are perfect but because they are our brothers and sisters. We can disagree, we can and should seek to influence Jews who are distant from Torah, but always b’darkei noam ubidarkei shalom. And never can it come at the expense of the love and affection we must feel for them.
To be sure there are those who disagree with this approach. They hold that sometimes it is necessary to intimidate, to harass, to alienate – in order to preserve the ways of the Torah. But upon looking into the sichos and igros kodesh one hears a resounding ‘lo zu darkeinu!’
It is not an easy task. The yetzer hara sure doesn’t like it, and he puts up a heck of a fight. He garbs himself in a cloak of kedushah and tells us that it is our duty to preserve chassidishe standards even if its not ‘bidarkei noam ubidarkei shalom’. But that is an oxymoron. Chassidishkeit means living bidarkei hachassidus. We know what Chassidus tells us about how to relate to other Jews. Anything that opposes that is atzas hayetzer.
Of course everyone reading this has heard it many times. But it needs to be repeated. Especially when people say that the Rebbe’s approach is ‘inapplicable’ when it comes to unzere. (I don’t think the author of that statement meant it literally – still, not everyone grasps the subtleties of an article that repeatedly calls for harassment and alienation).
The Rebbe knew quite well who he was speaking to.
We can try to inspire each other, to influence each other to become better Jews, that is a wonderful thing. But we must do it as friends, as brothers.
Some might say this is naive. But its not. It is the truth. And it is a truth so powerful that the yetzer hara will do everything in his power to ‘cool it off’. We have been through machlokes before and have suffered so much as a community. There are signs that the trend is changing. Recently there’s been much talk of achdus. The prospects for healing rifts in our community seem brighter than they did a year ago. So the yezter hara had to think of something new to chas v’shalom divide us. Let’s not let that happen.
gaga googoo
I can’t wait to see the intelligent comments on this oped dated tonight, and tomorrow
we are the ones that can help them
not just out reach also in reach
Crown Heights motto
Forget Ahavas Yisroel – There’s a Tznius epidemic!
yehudis cohen
Incredible article!!! Beautifully written! HOw true and how important for everyone to hear divrei emes! Yasher koach to teh author adn please keep on writing articles like these!
intrested
for all those who are intersted, this is reffering to the nasty comments that have been posted recently.
The Rebbe must have another definition..
Obviously the Rebbe didn’t conflate Ahavas Yisrael with abstention from excessively critical language. See for example Miketz 5713:
“בעל-הבית” הוא דבר מזוהם. – כן הי’ לשון כ“ק מו”ח אדמו“ר.
והיינו, שגם ”בעל-הבית“ שמתנהג כדבעי בכל הענינים, ובמילא לא שייך לומר עליו דבר בלתי-רצוי, דבר האסור או אפילו דבר שאינו טהור – הרי זה בכל זאת דבר מאוס, דבר מזוהם.
וכיון שחסידות שונאת ביותר ”בעל-הבית’ישע הנחות“, הנה סוף-סוף יהי’ זה דבר מופרך אצל כל בנ”י, שהרי תורת החסידות היא לכל בנ“י, כדברי כ”ק מו“ח אדמו”ר בשם אדמו“ר הזקן שתורת החסידות אינה עבור איזו מפלגה או כתה, אלא עבור כל בנ”י.
The Rebbe’s reaction to actual misconduct was infinitely more harsh.
Please post, Ch.info.
Yasher Koach to the Writer!!
I was just thinking about the comments that were posted recently of how they were riddled with deep nastiness, to the point that it is worthless to TRY to say something as others WILL take it the wrong way vehemently and publicaly. A sick “community”. To the point of just live your life quietly living in Crown Heights, and don’t even attempt to say or do anything as you will fill the brunt of it and it will haunt you for the rest of your life. A stinging hurt.
This article is a ONE OF A KIND! Worth more than anything!! Beautifully written in a pareve way: “Words that come from the heart enter the heart”
May we all take a lesson from this article and apply it practically to our lives, both individually and communaly.
goldy
Thank you.
Lovely article.
So true
Thank you for the right words to read on Tisha Bav. You are to be commended for reminding us of the Rebbe’s message, the Rebbe;s life work and the Rebbe’s modelling of how to achieve this!
ceo
why can’t we do both Ahavas Yisroel and Tznius? The first can help bring the second.
another thought, as I heard from someone:
agree
to disagree.
figure that one out. It means that you will see the the other person’s opinion, diagree, and just accept it that way.
Its not too hard if you know that its the only way things will work out in achdus and ahavas yisroel.
#2 has a good point, well said in very few words.
unbelievable
Beautiful article and so true. I thank CH.info for putting it on. No. 3 you wrote these words Forget Ahavas Yisroel. I wish you would write your name so I or anyone else I know would know not to marry into your family. Shame , shame , shame.
Commenter #6
Since I was unaware about this website’s language limitations, my original post appeared slightly different than intended; here instead is a translation of the original quotations from Miketz 5713 where the Rebbes strikes the ‘right tone’:
“”A ‘baalabos’ is a filthy thing“, this is what my father-in-law said.
”What this means is that even a ‘baalabos’ who always behaves properly, who can’t be linked to undesirable behavior either forbidden or impure — still, he is something repulsive, something filthy (davar ma’us, davar mezuham).
“And since Chassidus exceedingly despises ‘baalabatishe sentiment’, ultimately this will become intolerable for every Jew, as the teachings of Chassidus are intended for every Jew, like my father-in-law states in the Alter Rebbe’s name about how the teachings of Chassidus are not partisan or exclusive; rather, they apply to every Jew.”
[Speaking of ‘baalabatishe sentiment’, the Rebbe always cited the din in Choshen Mishpat “daas baalei batim – hepech daas torah”, in the sense that the layman’s opinions were unwelcome; maybe we should stick to quoting the Rebbe].
kingston bad boy
more lubavitch than jewish ;)
tznuis?
beautiful artical!! to #3 the “Tznius epidemic” may be directly linked to the manner in which the Bais rivkah hanholas action and the way they treat their students. look deeper in to it!! and BTW you can have ahavas yisroel and not dress tzniusly
Torah guidelines exist for tochacha
Torah gives very limited and very specific guidelines for when a person feels compelled to administer Tochacha. Many of us, R”L, do not comply with these guidelines, and are rather quick to meanly criticize, humiliate, embarrass, etc. another Yid.
This essay is a good reminder to review the Torah guidelines for administering Tochacha now, before the next opportunity to criticize presents itself!
PS — I’m not saying that we should let people walk all over us, but rather, that we must be effective, not destructive.
Hashem help us
Agree with no. 14. on her point about the tznius problem directly linked to the manner in which our mosdoth treat their students. Even though my children attend Bais Rivka , I know enough about the other mosad as well to know that they are just as much or maybe even more, not sure to the exact percentage but both are guilty on this point. Do those principals and mechanchos even read these comments so they could be in touch to rectify the situation. Hashem help us. And agree with you no. 14 also on the ahavas yisroel point too.You can have ahavas yisroe and be not tznius.As well as and is very common in this neighborhood have tznius on the outside and no ahavas yiroel. Totally a chitzonius thing.And no. 11 .Agree with you all the way. Wouldn’t want to marry into that family either.
CH Chosid
By withholding critical sentiments and feelings from an individual who clearly and simply SHOULD AND COULD know and do better – then you are doing the opposite of ahavas yisroel. Ahavas yisroel does not mean “live and let live” – especially when it comes to halacha and Toraseinu HaKedosha!
Bottom line: If you want to (R“L) eat YOUR traifa sandwich – I’mm NOT going to let you ”Live and let live”, and I’mm gonna do whatever I can to make sure you and everyone else knows what you’re doing.
so true
#14 What u said is very true
Have a heart
Excellent article coming from the very heart of “touchy-feely-Lubavitch”.