Jewish Moms Share Secrets in New Facebook Group

“I never fold my kids clean laundry. Just dump them all in their drawers.”

“My five year old was very excited to show me the drawing she had made in school. It was of me lying in bed, looking miserable, with a basin at my side. I’m three months pregnant. Not sure what her teacher thinks.”

“I think I just sent my daughter to school in her brother’s shirt.”

Moms are human too, right? Nope, at least not according to the social pressure most moms feel.

Spend a moment on Pinterest and you’ll find about a thousand moms who make awesome princess themed birthday parties for their three year olds–with handcrafted invitations, and desert tables that would knock the Queen of England’s socks off. On Facebook you’ll see how all the other moms make daily gourmet meals for their family, and keep their kitchen spanking clean. If you follow a parenting blog you’ll learn how moms are really doing everything wrong, and the kids are only throwing tantrums because they haven’t been taught better.

Okay, maybe it’s not so bad, but it’s time for moms to know that they aren’t the only ones struggling. That’s why all these moms have gathered together to share their embarrassing parenting secrets.

“I still rock my two year old to sleep. My husband thinks it takes a whole hour, when really it’s 10 minutes of rocking and 50 minutes on Facebook, YouTube, and emails.”

“I’m pregnant and tired. I was going to resort to eggs for supper, but the idea made me nauseous… So it was cereal and milk instead. Now my son is refusing to go to sleep, because ‘we just had breakfast so it’s the morning!’ What a dysfunctional day.”

“I was too tired to get up this morning, so I bribed my two year old with a chocolate chip cookie so that she’d sit quietly in my room. I woke up ten minutes later to a chocolate coated face, and chocolatey hands climbing all over my bed… I’m not sure if it was worth it.”

Obviously moms have been waiting for this, because within three weeks, ‘Jewish Mom Secrets’ gathered over 600 Facebook fans. Every day dozens of secrets are submitted, with half being posted anonymously, and then loved by other moms. Some secrets bring on laughs, some sympathy, and some are lauded as the best mom tips ever. Even better than Pinterest.

“Every night I sing my baby to sleep. I put him in his crib and sing my heart away, until he falls asleep. Well, I live in an apartment building and last night I got an email from an elderly neighbour that he ‘sincerely enjoys my nightly concert.’ Oh.”

“Today I went to my first therapy session. I hope I can learn to bring up my children without constantly yelling at them.”

“I just turned on the stove fan so I could open and eat a packet of chips without my daughter hearing.”

 “I do silly jumping jacks when I want to yell at my kids.”

Maybe it does take superhuman powers to handle what all moms do, but when the day winds down most moms don’t feel like superheroes. It’s normal for moms to start blaming themselves for every little thing that went wrong, and wonder why their kid’s bedrooms don’t sparkle like the Goldberg’s. It’s normal to do that, but moms, here’s a better plan: Put on your superhero cape, sit down on Facebook, and laugh along with all the other moms on the ‘Jewish Mom Secrets’ page.

“I always planned on being the perfect mom. I just didn’t know that perfect moms have piles of dirty dishes in the sink, messy bedrooms, and toddlers throwing themselves on the floor of the supermarket because they ‘need mo nice cweam sticks!'”