Weekly Story: Looking Forward (Part 2 of 2)

by Rabbi Sholom DovBer Avtzon

Last week I posted how the Rebbe informed Malka of the potential pitfalls of sharing an apartment with a non-Jew of the same gender. This week I am posting how the Rebbe looked at potential pitfalls of even maintaining strong friendships with them.

While Malka gave it to me as one story, I chose to divide it into two sections, as each one has its own significant lesson.

At the same time I want to clarify one point that was commented about; the eruv she constructed under the guidance of Dayan Raskin, was for her backyard and dock. I don’t think anyone will question your eruv chatziros in your two family house or apartment building, or the eruv you make for your driveway or yard. So why question her ability to follow the guidance? Besides the fact she is quite learned.

Bezras Hashem I will clarify much of the misunderstandings next week.

I will now continue with her correspondence.

I can add another point to that encounter with the Rebbe [which happened in the early 70’s]:

The Rebbe was strongly against me developing ANY friendship with non-Jews. He pointed out how far Chazal went to discourage friendships between Jews and non-Jews, even of same gender, by forbidding their wine and other prohibitions (maybe he specified: cooking, bread, oil, cheese – but I don’t remember).

I told him that I am surrounded only by non-Jews – there were no Jews at all where I lived, so that would confine me to a lonely solitary life.

He looked me in the eye and said, a friendship between you and a Gentile girl can lead to a Jewish girl being involved with and giving honor and praise to Avoda Zara!

When he said this, I was shocked and started to tremble.

This was in January.  I confessed to him of what happened just a few weeks earlier.  I had a non-Jewish friend that invited me to her house just a few weeks earlier, on December 25 to join her family for coffee/tea. It was their family x-mass gathering.

I attended, had coffee and tea while they sang many songs around a x-mass tree and fireplace.

It was a beautiful gathering, but the whole time I was there, I felt uncomfortable. I was sweating and felt as if my body was burning in a fire.  Something was very wrong. After the gathering ended, I went home to sleep and I experienced terrible nightmares – something that I never had before (this was unusual and frightening because I always sleep very peacefully).

I told the Rebbe of my attendance at this “innocent” family gathering of my non-Jewish girlfriend, that it was a non-religious “kosher” gathering.

The Rebbe was very upset and said that the songs/hymns give honor and praise to Avoda Zara and the entire gathering is connected to Avoda Zara.

He was so upset that I started to tear, and tears were rolling down my cheeks.

The Rebbe immediately changed his tone and even smiled a bit and told me not to be sad or upset. He said it was an innocent mistake that came from not being aware of the pitfalls that surround us, which Chazal were very aware of these dangers.

He suggested that I learn over the next few weeks from a Chabad sefer called Derech Mitzvosecha, a section called Mitzvas HaEmunas Elokus (first 4 chapters from 12 chapters) and also Mitzvas Achdus Hashem.  That teshuva makes a person on a higher level and now that I am aware, to be extra careful from friendships and social interactions (that go beyond normal business interactions) with Gentiles of any gender.

Point is, not only are Gentile roommates forbidden for a Jew, but even to have friendships with Gentiles is something that Chazal were adamantly against and took steps to prevent such socializing. That is “havdalah”, separation bein Yisroel lo’Amim.

Rabbi Avtzon is a veteran mechanech and author of numerous books on the Rebbeim and their chassidim. He is available to farbreng or talk in your community and can be contacted at avtzonbooks@gmail.com

84 Comments

    • 2. Shlucha wrote:

      I have told over this long story to mekurovim. I started from earlier parts and they are so taken by it. They sit spell bound and simply walk away feeling elevated spiritually.

  • 4. Question to Editor of Crownheights.info wrote:

    Why the picture of a college campus? This part 2 has nothing to do with campus! I am certain Rabbi Avtzon did not pick this picture, Besides, I am a fan of the original picture of You Were Not Abandoned: a girl holding her father’s hand.

    Reply
    • 5. Devorie wrote:

      If you read intro, it is one story that R’ Avtzon on his own initiative split into two parts. Pretend it was all printed as one – then you wouldn’t have a question about photo, right?! Because it started as a story with a message to Chabad on Campus Shluchim dealing with students that room in colleges…

  • 6. Come On! wrote:

    How can a girl learn Derech Mitzvosecha on her own?! It’s like telling her to learn Zohar.

    Reply
    • 7. Crownheightser wrote:

      We know she is very learned. She went to Gateshead Seminary. She is able to build a eiruv! If she was told to learn a maamor, I am sure she has the ability to do so.

    • 8. Epiphany wrote:

      I just figured it out!

      She was told to ” learn over the next few weeks from Derech Mitzvosecha”

      Why “over next few weeks”?

      Here is the genius: The Rebbe DAVKA picked a difficult sefer with the intention that she won’t be able to learn it herself.

      He gave her ” a few weeks” to find a teacher, a chassidishe lady or shaliach to teach it to her the sefer and become her mashpiah.

      ABSOLUTELY GENIUS!

    • 9. Rabbi Sholom Avtzon wrote:

      i wrote to her “your Good”
      She replied that “I learned it to the best of my ability.”

      And isn’t that what is being asked of each one of us, to do the best we can.

    • 10. Milhouse wrote:

      What difference does it make whether she’s a girl or a boy? If a boy can learn Derech Mitzvosecho, why would a girl not be able to?

    • 11. Derech mitzvosecha wrote:

      Learning derech mitzvosecha is not hard to learn for someone who knows some hebrew. I am learning what the rebbe told malka to learn and its fascinating

    • 12. What's the question wrote:

      She was never told to learn it ALONE. She was told to learn it “over the next few weeks”, which would give her time to find someone to teach it to her! Maybe that was part of the kavonah, to connect with a mashpiah through learning chassidus.

    • 13. Bochur wrote:

      Milhouse, reality check here! Bochurim (you call them “boys”) have the background to learn deeper sifrei chassidus, which girls simply never got. My sister always asks me for help when she doesn’t understand something in her Chitas, especially in Tanya. So there is an educational difference in the Torah knowledge between “boys” and girls.

    • 14. To Rabbi Avtzon wrote:

      “your good”

      YOU’RE – You are
      YOUR – It belongs to you

      It’s not:
      Thank you
      Your welcome

      You’re welcome!

  • 16. About to bentch licht wrote:

    Checked cholent, checked Weekly Story. Need to read it! Now I am ready for shabbos. I am inspired and have a great story to share with evryone.

    Reply
    • 17. Today? wrote:

      Hello, it’s TISHA B’AV TODAY!
      No cholent! Are you preparing for next shabbos?

    • 18. Dan Lkaf Zchus wrote:

      She wrote her comment on FRIDAY! You only saw it on Tisha B’Av and jumped to conclusions. Most questions and skeptics simply jump to conclusions, v”dal.

  • 19. Wondering wrote:

    In Part ! she was told pitfalls of non-Jewish roommate involves bishul akum and shabbos, What about the obvious: that a religious x-ian goy would bring actual avoda zara, like a cross, into the home? Isn’t that a GREATER concern!

    Reply
    • 20. Anonymous wrote:

      I believe the difference is, your concerns are apparent, and just like you may state that i am a non-smoker, or something similar, you can state this upfront.
      However, what the Rebbe was addressing is points that a person might not realize there is a problem with, and therefore he had to bring it to her attention.

    • 21. Rabbi K from BMG wrote:

      Poskim say that a cross itself is NOT avoda zara (therefore a Jew can possess stamps, coins or jewelry that has a cross). Certainy there is no issur if a goy brings their own cross into a Jewish home.

    • 22. Dov wrote:

      Rabbi K I must respectfully disagree.
      When the Rebbe spoke against having a television in one’s house hestated, that on the show you may see someone wearing or bowing to a cross, and you are bringing avodah zora into the house.
      That was said about a fleeting image, how much more so an actual cross

    • 23. Kop Docktar wrote:

      Rabbi K, are you a possek?

      Many break off the tzelem on a chess game for the sole purpose of not to have a tzelem in their house!

      Many don’t even say the word for tzelem!

      You should stick to arguing with Milhouse and keep away from psak din.

    • 24. Two kinds of Tzelem wrote:

      Ben Ish Chai Year II, Masei #2, which is based on the Chochmat Adam:
      בזה”ז כל הצורות הנמצאים בין בכפרים בין בכרכים אם ניכר הדבר שנעשו לשם ע”ז אסורים, וכן צורת שתי וערב שמעמידין בבית כנסיה שלהם בפניה דינו כע”ז ממש, שהרי מכבדין אותם, וכן כל שתי וערב שמניחין בכל מקום אם מכבדין אותם שלוקחין הכובע ומשתחוים להם, דינם כע”ז ממש, אבל צורת שו”ע שתולין על הצואר וכיוצא אלו נעשין לזכרון ולא נקראו צלם ואין להם דין ע”ז, ועיין חכ”א כלל פ”ז סעיף א’ יע”ש:

    • 25. More wrote:

      צלב (שתי וערב) שתולין אותו הנוצרים בצוארם, אין לו דין עבודה זרה, שלא נעשה אלא לזכרון בעלמא, ומותר בהנאה, כיון שאין דרך להשתחוות לו, והוא הדין לצלב הניתן לאיש נכבד מאת המלכות לאות הוקרה וכבוד, (מדליה), שאין בו כל חשש שהשתחוו לו, שמותר לאיש ישראל לעונדו על חזהו ולהתכבד בו, כיון שאין בו סרך של עבודה זרה, רק לכבוד בעלמא, אלא שטוב שלא לעונדו תמיד, אלא רק בשעה שמבקר אצל אנשי השלטון, ובהופעות רשמיות, וכיוצא בזה. [שו”ת יחוה דעת ח”ג סי’
      סה. הליכות עולם ח”ז
      עמוד רעז]

    • 26. Huh? wrote:

      R. Chaim Soloveitchik would even rearrange silverware that happened to be placed like a cross (Nefesh Ha-Rav, p. 230)

    • 27. Dov wrote:

      Rabbi K, I must respectfully disagree with this statement of yours.

      When the Rebbe spoke against having a television in one’s house he stated, IT IS BRINGING AVODAH ZORA INTO THE HOUSE.

      He explained, on the screen you are going to see an image of their religion and that is AVODAH ZARA.

      So definitely one can not allow it in their house.

      Now what to do with a maid etc., who has it on her necklace, ask a Rov

    • 28. Wondering wrote:

      Thank you Rabbi K, but not every goy is x-ian, a Hindu or Buddist goy would have an actual pessel getchkeh!

    • 29. To Dov wrote:

      Having a TV etc. – is that ossur as halacha or as middas chassidus. After all, there was also a time that farbrengens were broadcasted on cable TV, which makes positive use of TV, even though the TV (and for that matter, also computer!!!!) could be used to bring Avoda Zara into house.

    • 31. Reader wrote:

      The segment you speak about – that was a story of getting matza which prevented her from attending a CHURCH, but she likely still attended at non-Jewish friend’s homes, until she was told the pitfalls in this story. My guess is this story happened sometime AFTER the earlier story, maybe shortly after.

  • 32. Did not make her cry wrote:

    I have trouble believing that someone like the Rebbe would even indirectly make anyone cry, certainly not an orphan. Maybe she was just getting emotional and regretting her own actions but tears were not caused by Rebbe.

    Reply
    • 33. Obvious wrote:

      As a baalas teshuva I am aware how tears just well up and flow when a person thinks of the mistaken choices that were made in the past. It is automatic and a sincere part of doing teshuva. FFB’s don’t know what this is!

    • 34. where you coming from wrote:

      Of course the Rebbe did nit make her cry. Why would you even think so? You wrote as if it says so but it doesn’t. You accused and questioned in your mind and then you felt need to defend and answer. The rest of us never had any question.

  • 35. Victoria wrote:

    Where do you draw the line between “friendship” vs “acquaintance” vs “work colleague” with a Gentile neighbor, co-worker, associate? I am very serious and looking for a clear bright line boundary.

    Reply
    • 36. Rabbi Sholom Avtzon wrote:

      That is something you should discuss with your Rov and mashpia (spiritual mentor).

    • 37. Victoria wrote:

      My rabbi says there is nothing wrong with socializing with Gentiles.

      He pointed out that Rabbi Judah The Prince was good friends with Antoninus Pius, 145 AD.

      Is there various opinions about this?

    • 38. Maven wrote:

      Wikipedia:
      Friendship is a relationship of mutual affection between people. Friendship is a stronger form of interpersonal bond than an association.

      Dictionary:
      “acquaintance” a person one knows slightly, but who is not a close friend.

      That’s pretty clear, no?

    • 39. My 2 cents wrote:

      Quoting from story:
      friendships and social interactions (that go beyond normal business interactions) with Gentiles of any gender

    • 40. Victoria wrote:

      Also, I really enjoy and learn a great deal from this site, but my rabbi says that the views expressed in this site are radical and extreme that do not represent mainstream Judaism. That confuses me because what is “mainstream” Judaism? I did not see anything radical or extreme on this site. There is no call for violence or anything “radical”. There is no discriminatory statements. So what views are “radical” or “extreme”? He said something about believing that their leader is still alive even though he was buried nearly 2 dozen years ago. I did not see any such statements or articles here. Speaking with my rabbi leaves me confused.

    • 41. Shlucha wrote:

      Dear Victoria,
      Please contact the local Chabad House and arrange to speak with the Rabbi’s Wife. Explain to her what you read on this site and the very valid question you asked. It is worthy of a serious in-person discussion. If you have trouble locating the Rabbi’s Wife, contact Rabbi Avtzon and he will certainly direct you to someone local that would be available to discuss your very important question.
      Wishing you sisterly love,
      A Shlucha (Rebbe’s Emissary and Ambassador of Jewish Good Will) that is distant in location but close in heart to all fellow Jews wherever they may be

    • 42. To Victoria wrote:

      I am not a Rabbi but a simple Jew, and speak as a simple unlearned Jew. Not all rabbis are Rabbis. You understand? I am not an eloquent writer that can write with prose and depth. I simply mean, maybe find a Chassidic or Chabad Rabbi to discuss this and other issues of faith.

    • 43. A Moradik Shtark Kashya! wrote:

      That is a moradik Shtark kashya:

      Rabbe Yehuda Hanosi was best friends with Antoninos.

      What is a tiretz to this shtark kashya???

    • 44. Anonymous wrote:

      … is every gentile friend the pious one, who respects our way of life.
      Finally I assume you live in a Jewish neighborhood and socialize with many Jews, so perhaps there can be some leniency, if there are safeguards that friendship doesn’t develop.
      however, here we are speaking about an individual who has no Jewish neighbors, so obviously there has to be more stringent safeguards.

    • 45. Impressed with shlucha wrote:

      I am so impressed with the thoughtfulness and wisdom of Shlucha’s comment. You make us proud.

  • 47. Fayga Bruchie wrote:

    Sensing that a person was at such a place is the message I took from this story.
    When we do something good or bad, there remains an impression on us, that a godol can see clearly on our face, sense the smell emanating from us, for the godol it is obvious to observe.
    Not sure if it is navuah / ruach hakodesh or having spiritual sensitivity. We can debate that. Many a godol have this ability!
    A godol can openly tell a person with certainty about a place where they must have been or what they must have done, good or bad.

    Reply
    • 48. Chosid wrote:

      A REBBE is more than just a “godol” A REBBE is the Moshe Rabbeinu of the generation: Shchina midaberes mitoch girono.

    • 49. Yoili from Willie wrote:

      Fayga Bruchie, you always on chabad sights? Does Tatty knows? As ur older bruder I need tell him.

  • 51. Am I allowed to read this story on Tisha Av wrote:

    I enjoy these stories so much. Am I allowed to read them on Tisha Av after chatzos?

    Reply
    • 52. Rov wrote:

      Do you ask all your halachical question on internet blogs? Do you decide questions of shabos, kashrus, nida based on rov dayos of comments or based on a real rov? Assei l’cha rov!

  • 53. Thanks wrote:

    Thanks for putting out these weekly stories. So many people read them and it gives us the chassidishe flavor from the past which is now missing. The stories of “Malka” ‘s encounters are very special. I write “Malka” because I realized that it might not be her real name as I read last week that she goes by an English name. I am very disappointed because all along I was thinking of her in my mind as a Malka.

    Reply
    • 54. No No No wrote:

      Her name really IS Malka!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
      Don’t make a whole great mountain out of a tiny molehill of quotation marks.

  • 55. L'fi Daati wrote:

    She felt her “body burning in a fire” followed by horrible nightmares. I wonder if her ancestors might have fallen victim to auto-de-fé – burning at the stake al-kiddush Hashem. She obviously possesses a high neshama. Maybe as a great-grandchild of Kedoshim that gave their lives up rather than convert to x-tianity. Then it would make sense that she relive such feelings.

    Reply
    • 56. Gilgul? wrote:

      Maybe she herself is a gilgul who died that way in a previous life

    • 57. Anonymous wrote:

      Rabbi Avtzon wrote in introduction to Part 1 that ” both her biological parents and adoptive parents were survivors of the holocaust”, so no need to go back to the auto-de-fé, many Jews experienced “body burning in a fire” in the ovens of the evil Nazis YM”SH.

  • 58. Interacting with gentiles wrote:

    Rabbi Avtzon, thank you for the interesting stories. Did the Rebbe ever give horaah for interacting, or one’s children interacting, with non-Jewish “relatives”, either because of a convert to Judaism or r”l, intermarriage?

    Reply
    • 59. Rabbi Sholom Avtzon wrote:

      Yes there are directives,
      However, I am not a Rov and I don’t know if it was for that particular person or as a rule.
      Additionally, this is who words, as she heard it from the Rebbe, many things that we all hear are not from the source itself.
      Therefore I personally will be extremely careful about posting something in the Rebbe’s name, when I don’t get it firsthand.

  • 60. Shliach wrote:

    There is no state that doesn’t have at least one Chabad House. Wherever Malka lives, come on over to the Chabad House. You will be welcomed with open arms. Spend shabbos, be a guest, on the (Chabad) House!

    Reply
    • 61. Shaliach #2 wrote:

      I am adding to my colleague’s comment: Malka and Victoria and anyone else seeking information, connection or anything Jewish – our doors are open to you. The welcome mat is out. Step inside our Chabad House and you will be welcomed with love and acceptance.

    • 62. Shliach #3 wrote:

      I echo the comments of my fellow shluchim.

      Malka, I challenge you to come be the guest speaker at my Chabad House Dinner.

      Victoria, my wife would be happy to have you join us for a Shabbat weekend.

    • 64. Rabbi K from BMG wrote:

      Divrei Chachomim Y:D- 104 that halachically it is permitted however it is it preferred not to say it.

      Also see Olas Yitzchok 2-159 that it is permitted to say..

      Also see Mishne Halachos 9- 169, that it is controversial if the prohibition of not mentioning the name of an avodah zara applies to writing. He says that when the person does not mean to write the name of the avodah zara, such as writing the name of a town or street that is named after an avoda zara, since the person doesn’t mean the avodah zara, everyone would agree that it is permitted to write.

  • 65. Misunderstandings? wrote:

    “Bezras Hashem I will clarify much of the misunderstandings next week.”

    – WHAT MISUNDERSTANDINGS?

    Reply
  • 66. Rabbi K from BMG wrote:

    As a marbitz Torah, I wish to give insight to the directive of this story:

    Avodah Zarah (8a) Rabbi Yishmael states, “Jews outside of Israel are worshippers of idols betaharah – in purity.” This term “betaharah – in purity” means that they do so unintentionally.

    The reference, the Gemorah explains, is to Jewish people who attend non-Jewish weddings and, according to the Meiri, inadvertently cause the gentile to pray to and reinforce his sense of gratitude to the Avodah Zarah he is worshipping.

    Levush writes that the prohibition applies to any celebration, similar to a wedding. The attendance at a wedding is only used as an example of the prohibition. The prohibition extends it to all forms of parties.

    The Tanna D’bei Eliyahu chapter eight also extends the Gemorah’s prohibition to beyond that of a wedding.

    Pri Chadash (YD 114:6) also extends the prohibition to all forms of parties. He, however, writes that if the majority of those in attendance of the party are Jewish – then it is permitted. If it is fifty/fifty then it would be forbidden.

    Mishna Halachos (volume VII #118) forbids attending an office x-mass holiday party out of hand. He rules that the prohibition is based both upon the concern for Avodah Zarah as well as a concern for intermarriage where people meet at office parties. The author, Rav Klein z”l does not mention the Pri Chadash, but he does adopt such a view.

    Reply
  • 67. Rabbi K from BMG wrote:

    Furthermore, Reb Moshe Feinstein ZT”L emphasizes the prohibition of a Jew to celebrate the religious holidays of gentiles, to the extent that if a boy is to have a bar mitzvah on the day of their celebration, it should be postponed (Igrot Moshe, Even HaEzer, Part 2:13).

    Reply
    • 68. Thanks Reb K wrote:

      Sichas chullim tzrichin limud. Thanks Reb K for the halachic background to this directive.

      It makes it so much more meaningful and relevant to the public and not just a private directive nogeya only to this individual, as someone Anonymous WRONGLY suggested in an earlier comment ( “here we are speaking about an individual who has no Jewish neighbors, so obviously there has to be more stringent safeguards”).

  • 69. Yesher Koach wrote:

    Again, THANKS!

    as a simple advice: i always see in her story, that “As both her biological parents and adoptive parents were survivors of the holocaust, there was no family to turn to”
    Dear R Avtzon, (to help these beautiful Neshama) TODAY there are lots of tools and websites to find family related etc, ESPECIALLY holocaust survivors (jewishgen.org / YadVashem / geni, etc, etc)
    You can help her to find at least some related family for her adoptive parents (or biological, aderaba)

    Hatzlocho!

    Reply
    • 70. Kop Docktar wrote:

      The way I understand the circumstances, she has no immediate relative. Of course she might have distant relatives – every Yid has some relative (only a Ger has no Jewish relatives). But many people feel no family connection to 3rd cousins twice removed, or a great uncle’s grandchild. I don’t think the correct operative word is “no family to turn to”, but “no one to consider close family”. Also, I don’t know if you made the calculation but I estimate Malka’s age might be in her late 70’s.

  • 71. baruch wrote:

    “gentile roommates forbidden for a jew” do you have a source in halacha for this . I bet that it is not catagorically forbidden atleast not bedieved. Don’t make up your own halachat !!!.

    Reply
    • 72. Rabbi Sholom Avtzon wrote:

      Baruch I did not make up a halacha.
      I am not a Rov that paskens shailos in halacha. All I did was post a guidance in halacha that the Rebbe gave.
      This guidance referred to two pitfalls, namely Shabbos and kashrus as related in the previous post.
      In this week’s post the Rebbe forewarned of the potential possibility that it could lead up to Avoda Zoroh.
      Please discuss it with your Rov.
      If you or anyone else would like to discuss it further I don’t think a website is the forum to discuss halacha for obvious reasons
      Feel free to contact me and bezras Hashem I will respond.
      (As you will see in this week’s story).

    • 73. Yeshiva Bochur wrote:

      What about having non-religious Jewish room mates? Since they do not keep shabbos, wouldn’t the same concerns apply, of them opening lights for the religious room mate? Also, if they openly and publicly desecrate shabbos, is their cooking also bishal akum (as we say by wine that they are considered like goyim in that respect)?

    • 74. to Yeshiva Bochur wrote:

      You addressed a very painful topic, once again I believe you should discuss it with a Rov.
      If you are uncomfortable to do so personally, maybe Rabbi Avtzon will forward it to Dayan Raskin or another Rov on your behalf.
      May your neshoma shine!!

  • 76. Jim wrote:

    After attending Lubavitch chuppahs and parties/receptions in Crown Heights and other cities for children of whom I THOUGHT were good friends of mine, I am saddened to read this.

    Reply
    • 77. Dov wrote:

      Jim I am saddened that you are offended or hurt.
      Evidently you are a wise individual and therefore I ask you, what is the rate of intermarriage of Jews in America.
      Then tell me what is the rate of intermarriage if you don’t count orthodox Jews. It is horrifying.
      So when you are in Brooklyn yes you can be invited as an associate or even as a friend. But the gentile and the Jew are not BFF.
      Here you are speaking about an individual that has no Jew in her immediate surrounding and the need for friendship can sway a person away from the faith and we must be vigilant.
      We do not look to convince a non-Jew to convert but we have to safeguard our own

    • 78. To Jim wrote:

      As good as a friend that you are, if you would attend such a party and pour yourself a cup of fine wine that wasn’t cooked/ pasteurized, no Jew would be allowed to use neither the wine you pored or the rest of that expensive bottle of wine.

  • 79. Anonymous wrote:

    Dov

    That I understand, but my Chabad FRIENDS…any they Are dear friends.. and I do not try to convert, but rather discuss the common interests in our “Judeo-Christian” (my term) beliefs.
    After attending 2 chuppas, they told me “one more, and you are family.”
    I do not feel they did not mean what they said. Isn’t that a better way to understand each other?

    Reply
  • 80. There is family and there is "family" wrote:

    All humans belong to the family of mankind. Only Jews belong to the exclusive Jewish family. Chassidim are all one unique family.

    Each of these families includes and excludes based on the criteria of their family membership.

    Being a member of one of these families does not automatically grant admission to the other.

    Simply stating the obvious.

    Kop Doktar

    Reply
  • 81. Dov wrote:

    Once again look at the situation, you are a friend and a close friend, but there is no fear of it spilling over into a discussion about religion. They go to their synagogue and you go to your house of worship.
    So there are certain safeguards in place.
    But in the story we are talking about those safeguards were not in place, as she stated herself, it happened, that it turned to a religious observance..

    Reply

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