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From Orphan Child to Beaming Bride, A Jewish Wedding in Vilnius

Rebecca Rosenthal – Lubavitch.com
The bride and groom under the canopy, flanked by her guardians, Rabbi Krinsky, reading the Ketuba, and Mrs. Krinsky

Vilnius, Lithuania — While conflict and tension plague the country’s Jewish leadership, a divided community came together for a chuppah in Vilnius—a rare event in a country with high-intermarriage rates and one Chabad family working tirelessly to rebuild Jewish life one soul at a time.

Without Chabad of Vilnius, the bride would have walked down the aisle alone. Or maybe, she wouldn’t have married Jewish altogether.

Chaya (Luba) Gemelson had every reason to be lonely. She never knew her father. Her mother died when she was a year old. Five summers ago, the grandmother who raised her passed away. If nature had run its course, Chaya, a student at Chabad of Vilnius’s high school, would have become a case number in the State foster care system. But Chabad of Vilnius’s Rabbi Sholom Ber and Nechama Dina Krinsky were not going to let that happen. Then the parents of six children, ages nine and under, the Krinskys opened their home to Chaya and became her guardians.

The Chaya that twirled happily in her flounced white gown and shared quiet looks with Roman Itzkovitch, her groom, is miles from the sad teenager that first crossed the Krinskys’ door. Coming from a home where authority was held in the frail hands of an elderly woman, Chaya was accustomed to staying out past midnight. She balked at the Krinskys’ insistence that she come home earlier or check in if she was going to be late. There were more unsettling discoveries. Unbeknownst to the Krinskys, missionaries had been quite involved in Chaya’s grandmother’s life, adding more confusion to an already complicated situation.

Making Chaya feel at home was quite a handful for the Krinskys. Counseled by mentors, anti-missionary experts, and friends, the Krinskys made very few demands on Chaya. They didn’t push. They didn’t lecture. As the years passed, the Krinskys began noticing small changes in Chaya. Summers at their Camp Gan Israel helped. Close rapport with dorm counselors at the Krinskys’ school opened Chaya still more. Time worked its magic. Chaya’s strengths began to get the upper hand. “After all she’s been through, Chaya could be a bitter person. But she isn’t. She is a special girl. She doesn’t wear a chip on her shoulder,” said Rabbi Krinsky.

Hundreds of miles away, in Israel, Roman Itzkovitch could not have known that the medical school he chose because it was in his native Lithuania would do more than give him career training. Already familiar with Jewish traditions from the years he spent in the United States and Israel, Roman joined a group of Jewish students who spent Shabbat with the Krinskys. About a year or so after Roman’s first Shabbat with Chabad, when Rabbi Krinsky spoke to him about settling down with a nice Jewish girl, Roman worked up the nerve to inquire about Chaya.

After recovering from the “Sunrise, Sunset” shock common to parental figures faced with the prospect of their little girls growing up, the Krinskys saw the logic in the match. A few short months later Roman and Chaya announced their engagement. On a misty Tuesday night, 150 guests – including Chaya’s long lost aunt and cousin who became involved with Chabad through Chaya’s search for family – gathered at the chuppah, marriage canopy, set up near a lake on Le Meridien Villon Resort’s expansive green lawn.

Jew-to-Jew marriages in Lithuania are an endangered species. The Jewish Agency for Israel estimates that 80% of Jews in the former Soviet Union intermarry. The Krinskys have been actively working to counter this trend. Chaya and Roman were the fifth couple to marry because of the Krinskys’ encouragement.

Throughout the ceremony, Rabbi Krinsky shared mini-lessons on Jewish wedding rituals with the guests. The explanations, in addition to the dramatic nature of Chaya and Roman’s life story, created an atmosphere where there was “a true outpouring of joy. You could feel it.” As a musician flown in from Israel for the occasion sang classic Jewish wedding songs – with a swinging beat – Chaya pulled Nechama Dina into the middle of the dancing throng for an embrace. Young enough to be Chaya’s sister, Nechama Dina said, “It feels like I’ve married off my daughter.”

A joyful bride surrounded by her friends


The bride poses with her family, Rabbi Sholom B. and Nechama Dina Krinsky and children

Source: Lubavitch.com

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23 Comments

  • impressed

    How many shluchim are really there for the people who need them as to actually adopt a needy child into their family. WOW!!!

  • Good ole times

    Nechama Dina Wow you are really truly an inspiration to all of us!!
    You really are doing amazing work!!
    We are proud of you!!
    Your old tall classmate from Montgomery st!

  • ln

    to impressed
    it’s true that it’s a real act of miseras nefesh and with 8 children it’s an amazing thing to do. i only know of one other shliach who did that. ( a shliach in argentina with 9/10 young kids took in three not frum orphans who the church were trying to convert)

  • Devorah

    B”H

    DI epel falt nisht veit fun di boim!

    Over 36 years ago Rabbi Pinchus and Pearl Krinsky invited me to Their Home for five years for Shabbosim treating me like a family member.Today I am a frum Babi with many ainiklach bli ayin hora KOL Kavod to this fantastic family

  • impressed

    Yeah and another shliach in ukraine who KI”H also has quite a family of little children.

  • Racheli

    Amazing. I am speechless and have goosebumps!
    It’s wonderous to see how the Krinsy’s took her into their home, as if she were one of their own.

  • Chassidim ayn mishpocha

    The “about time” goes to us not the Krinskys. It is about time Anash focus on the unparralleled good that the Krinsks are doing instead of just repeating over the slander promoted by those who would benifit from Chabad of Vilnis’ demise!
    It is about time that we stop acting like baal habatim (daas baal habatim hepoch daas torah) and worrying about being politically or otherwise correct and instead focus on chassidim ayn mishpocha and react to the attacks against the Krinskys as though our own brother or sister was being attacked in such a devastating manner.
    Focus on the postive. I can’t remember but SB was probably a red sox fan in another lifetime. It is good to see that he is keepiong his eye on the ball. It is even more of a wonder to discover that we, too, are learning to.

  • another classmate

    Nechama Dina,
    What a beautiful story, but as a former classmate, I would not have expected differently from you.
    May the power of all the Rebbe’s brochos that you generate serve to eliminate all financial issues and chossid litvak issues that you deal with, and may we as commonfolk near those like you merit to see moshiach now!
    Your SHORT classmate from down the block!

  • Wow!!!

    Wow What an amazing story.

    the actual story is amazing but what really gets me is that this is probably the 1st article here on CH.info in the past few months that i remember reading with no negetive comments.
    Fellow Shliach keep up the great work
    Webby keep the article and pics coming.
    Pesimist kepp thos negative comments to yourself.

  • the feigelstocks in pittsburgh

    we love ya!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! uncle sholom ber!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and tante nechama dina!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! were sooooooooooooooooooo proud of all the amazing work you manage to do despite all the tremendous huge difficult obstacles!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    we know that the truth comes out eventually we hope its sooner than later!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! keep strong and youe sure doing your part to bring moshiach faster!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    you are the greatest!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Reuvein Korb

    Mazel Tov!
    I wish I could be at your wedding guys.
    Wishing you all the best, be very supportive of each other, love each other and care for one another.
    May Hashem Bless you in all your ways!

  • Miriam

    Mazal Tov!!! i am so happy for Chaya and Roman! i know Chaya pesonaly and i am so proud of her comming such a long way!
    Rabbi and Dina Krinsy, wish many more miricles like this to come your way! Lots of Love,
    Miriam & Larry Feinberg