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Moms of Multiples Meet Up in Crown Heights

Last night, 17 women gathered together in Crown Heights to meet, socialize and connect. What made this gathering unique? All of those present are mothers blessed with twins and triplets.

The evening was organized by creator of the Facebook group “Jewish Moms of Multiples, Masters of Multi-Tasking,” Rivky Perl.

When asked what inspired her to open such a group, her reply came easy: “I just wanted to create a space for other Jewish moms of multiples to share, connect, ask questions and learn from other mothers of multiples.”

In the span of 2 years, the group has reached 200 Jewish Women Worldwide, from Brooklyn, Florida and California to France, Israel and Australia. “It helps having different time zones,” Rivky laughs, “because you know there will always be someone up.”

“Resources when our twins were born were not around like they are today,” she went on. “Boruch Hashem, awareness of multiples has come within hands’ reach, and many moms are just a click away from a quick tip on handling anything. Still, over the years, what we did not have was our own club. There have been over a dozen of local events annually about child rearing but none relating to multiples directly. I keep sitting through the events and hearing all these amazing methods and ways to raise young children, and I wanted to ask, ‘but what do you do when you have 2 or 3 children that are the same age?’”

When organizing this night, Rivky reached out to group member Ahuva Fogelman, mom of 12-year-old boy and girl twins, who also kindly opened her home for the night. Ahuva suggested calling her aunt, Mrs. Shaina Ezagui.

Thankfully, Mrs. Ezagui was available to come and share her continued experiences.

“Mrs. Ezagui’s twin boys are in 9th grade. To all of us last night, she was our hero,” said Rivky. “She came bearing all smiles, and gave us the encouragement and hope we all so desperately needed to hear.  When it came to Q’s and A’s, there was not one silent mouth in the house. The camaraderie shared was so special. We felt like we knew each other and were so easily able to relate to one another.”

While most attendees were neighborhood locals, a mother from Williamsburg joined the group, and a trio drove in from Queens.

Refreshments and delicacies were enjoyed, and a fun game of interaction was played.

The night ended with a door prize, sponsored by Chaya Pruss, a mom of three sets of twins.

When asked by other moms in attendance what their number one and most useful tip for other mothers of multiples would be, unanimously they answered: getting help. “When people offer, take it. When others ask how they can help, tell them. Every dollar spent on help is worth it for a parent’s sanity.”

Their number one pet peeve, the moms of multiples agreed, is when other moms compare twins and/or triplets to Irish twins – two children born within the span of a year to 14 months.

“Yes, having two or three kids born close in age is a tremendous challenge, but please don’t tell me that you know how we feel or that having Irish twins is harder,” said one attendee.

Some women, like Rivky, have had another child born right after her twins. She laughs, “I can’t believe I’ll be having a double Bar Mitzvah and then a Bas Mitzvah, months apart. I am completely in awe of moms of triplets. Mothers of triplets or more are my heroes. I cannot begin to understand it. They are the real inspiration for the rest of us moms,” she said.

Special thanks go out to several local vendors for their co-sponsorship: Dovid Hershkowitz from Sushi Spot, Shlomi Klein from Mr. Greens and Chaya Pruss from Everything but the Baby. This was a homemade event and thanks to their generosity, it was an enjoyable one too.

For more information about the group and upcoming events, click here.

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43 Comments

  • Identical twin

    As an identical twin I would love to meet these mothers and give them advise on how to care for twins, especially identical ones… especially when it comes to Shidduchim. I see alot of pairs get messed over by their parent’s inability to differentiate between them

    • Identical twin

      Your a terrible troll… with Poshut nothing to do other than revile others

    • tsugin

      poshut you obviously don’t have multiples, and probably don’t have any children or you’re understand the challenges of having any number more than zero.

      im yirtzah hashem by you, as they say.

  • not fair

    not fair to insinuate that having irish twins isn’t as hard as real twins. I dont doubt that twins arent easy, but I also dont doubt that irish twins can be just as hard for entirely different reasons. With twins you can be chasing 2 toddlers, but with Irish twins You are chasing a toddler, while holding an infant, while your body has just gone through a pregnancy and birth…

    • totally agree

      Was thinking the same thing. Additionally with twins more help is offered from friends and family

  • hard working mom

    these women want to be felt as if they are higher then others in the community, plenty of families have more children then they do and close in age and work hard day and night to take care of them

    maybe its time to make a group for moms with 2 children within a year or 4 children within 4-5 years, it will never end

    stop separating the community

    all moms are one united to raise their kids

    • me myself and I

      Booo Hooo wa wa!!!

      You are no better then they are… grow up. No one is separating themselves If you feel left out do something about it.

      In the meantime get out of your PJs and take care of your kids, yes the ones close in age.

      Stop spreading your depression.

  • mom of Irish twins

    not to put a damper on moms with twins however i was taken aback about the comment of irish twins. To say its not as difficulty is comparing apples to pears. They are different with pros and cons in both situations. Not like we have a choice. However the pros of twins would have to be the help offered, the children are at the same stage, shopping for the same items only getting two. When you have two kids one year apart no one blinks. None or not much help is offered. You also have gone through two pregnancies, births, attempts at weight loss and are dealing with two children at completely different stages.
    And although i know that finding out that one is having twins is a tremendous shock and surprise. FYI finding out that your pregnant 8 weeks after giving birth is also quite the shocker ;)
    All moms are ROCKSTARS!
    Dont get me wrong multiples are a huge challenge but putting down the hardships of irish twins im personally not a fan of.
    All moms are ROCKSTARS!

    • local mom

      I don’t think the comment was initiating that irish twins aren’t hard to raise. I didn’t read that anyone was putting others down.

      And yes, I agree, all moms are rockstars!

  • malca bayzman

    i think this group is a wonderful idea and kol hakovd for having it come together – hatzlacha

  • Mum of twins

    Wish i could have been there!! Thanx rivky! Youre great!
    Rachel from france!

  • part of the group

    Wow! Everybody calm down please! The point of the group isn’t to separate us or put anyone else down, but to simply unite those of us who have something in common. I’m sure that no one in the twins group would mind if someone started a support group for moms of Irish twins, or moms who only have boys, or dad’s who only have girls, or mothers whose twins are their firsts …… In fact, maybe someone should. good luck with that:-). Personally I wouldn’t care or feel like you think you are better then me, b/c you’re not (b/c I’m a mother of twins hehe). Anyway, I think you’reall all just jealous b/c we got free sushi. Good shabbos

  • twins is a plus

    having twins is a blessing,

    you save lots of money for you get more help more gifts then a single mom, and when it comes to birthday parties and bar/bas mitzvah you can do 2 for 1

    so lets do the math parents who have 10 children one after another
    need to be pregnant 10 times and do the rest of the walk 10 times

    someone who has 5 twins will do half the work

    btw people with twins usually have less children then those who do not

    bottom line is moms with twins have it harder for the actual birth but you cant compare having twins to another mom who has 2 children one after another

  • Anonymous

    I Can’t believe that something as innocent as a few moms getting together to discuss something they have in common can get such negative comments from other women. Maybe it’s jealousy, maybe it’s boredom on their part. Very sad indeed how some can be so negative.. What a wonderful idea to have this group for moms of multiples!! For those of you who appear by your comment bitter and jealous about it, go ahead and start a group you feel lacking in the community. Stop kvetching and start DOING!!

  • The moore support groups the merrier!

    If you feel that you are lacking support as a mom that has many children close in age,by all means create a support group to give you the strength and support that you need..
    If you are insecure with the choices you made,please don’t bash others who are having a wonderful evening.
    There is nothing discriminatory as to how many children G-d blessed our uteruses with.
    I’m all for support groups for both men and women.
    We actually discussed creating a father of mutiples group!
    Let’s thank G-d for all of the beautiful souls he blessed us with.
    Gratitude is something we express when we get together.

    -A blessed mom of precious twins
    By the way,the food was fabulous,and we rocked tbe house!

  • So much fun!

    Who cares why these woman got together!!! They had a great time , a little break, good laughs , and yummy food! Who needs a reason these days to have a positive outlet ? With all the tzoros we face today , go out there and bring some joy for whatever reason you like! I’m sure all those that have negative comments would be welcomed with open arms to the next
    Gathering even if you didnt have multiples no one will ask you for birth certificates:)))!

  • beautiful!!

    such an event deserves ONLY positive comments. this is a NEWS site that is spreading something good that a group of heros are doing (yes, every person is a hero with their particular situation).
    support groups are wonderful
    if you are lacking support in raising children- there are MANY wonderful sites, workshops, learning etc. YOU can do too!- so be happy for others who are!

  • mom of twins

    Twins are complicated. And special. And I’m blessed to have them. However, the first two years were insane w premie twins. And is is harder to mother multiples, as any mom of both multiples and singletons will tell you.

  • Esty B

    Three sets of twins! Mrs. Pruss, how do you manage? What a blessing and challenge. How wonderful these moms can be there to support each other.

  • Parent of Twins

    Can anyone give us advice on splitting twins into different classes at school? Is this recommended(2 girls). What if the only Lubavitch School in our country has only ONE class? Should we send our kids to a non Lubavitch school so that they are in different classes?

    I would appreciate feedback only from “those in the know”

    Thank you

  • IT'S ABOUT TIME

    Not to put this group of women down, but perhaps it’s time to start a similar group for mothers of quadruplets and quintuplets though not born at the same time. In other words for mothers with 4, 5, 6 and 7 children with the oldest being 7 years old.

    • Twin Mommy

      Sounds like a great idea :)

      Please put one together-
      I’ll come!

      Signed, mom of 3 kids in 14 months.

  • I am confused

    i know its tough having twins as babies..but when they get older isnt it like having 2 kids..like anyone has 2 kids.

  • Weirdos

    half you people here are so weird, I think this was a nice get together, almost every religious Jewish mother is a mom of 2 or more kids about a year apart so a gathering like that happens every Thursday at empire kosher when everyone is shopping for Shabbos with all their kids. Twins or triplets is not so common and also unpredictable, maybe you gals should get control of how many kids you are having and when you are having them its called “planned parenting” its 2013 get a pill or something don’t complain about having to many kids so close together no one did it to you but yourself, and it sounds like you don’t like your kids……Shame!!!!

  • Eli Wilansky

    I am proud to leave my name on top! I am not confused or either have twins of my own, or even did not get the FREE sushi…;)

    But this is just wonderful, I’m not just commenting bc My sister is Rivky Perl, she is a great sister and I admire her work and what she is doing, she is also a great mother, wife etc. how she arranged to gather so many mothers for this great event.

    Just would like to wish her Hatzlacha in all that you do to make us proud and we should see the Geula of Moshiach speedily now in our days :)

    your bro from Jax FL :))

  • Miriam Roetter

    to # 27
    I had premie twins, the youngest in our family.
    I did not have a choice, school policy separates Twins. Turned out to be the best thing ever. They had different teachers (no comparing one with the other), different activities and made different friends. Each one became their own self. They are now 19 and pursuing different career choices.
    And as far as which is harder ( I had 4 children when my oldest was 5 ) which ever you have at the time is hardest for you. They are all special BROCHAS, Love them and enjoy them. each one is a special Diamond. We all get through it, no reaqson to compare.

  • King Willy Ix

    Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it’s always your choice. keep it up rivky!!!
    shalom shabat!

  • Mom of twins and singletons

    Shocked by the insecure moms who lashed out here. Unless you carried, gave birth to, and raised multiples, one has absolutely no idea of the challenges involved, on so many levels. My advice to the angry moms: start your own support groups, seems like there is a serious need…

  • I agree to # 32 & 34!

    I am SO PROUD of my sis Rivky Perl! You are doing a FABULOUS JOB!!! Keep up the gr-8 work!!!

    your Big sis,
    Sarah’le Lesches

  • twin mom

    I have identical twin girls
    who just graduated college .
    They started school at a young age.