Op-Ed: Is Sinas Chinam Getting in the Way of Lubavitch?
by An Annonymous Bochur
Besides for all the other missions the Rebbe sent his soldiers on, one of the most glorious missions (in my opinion) is Hafotzas Hamayonos. We all know that it is the guarantee from Moshiach himself that it is what will bring him in. As we all look forward to the season of Yud Tes Kislev and Chanukah, the koch in this seems to get stronger, seeing as the Alter Rebbe’s imprisonment was the kitrug on chassidus, and Yud Tes Kislev is the kitrug’s annulment. Anyone who has a connection to chassidus celebrates this day, Baruch Hashem. As the Rebbe’s soldier in Tomchei Temimim, part of my responsibility is preventing anything that could hinder Hafotzas Hamayonos and the achdus it brings, (G-d forbid). It therefore hurts me very much to talk about this issue, but either way I feel like I must.
I learn in one of the Rebbe’s yeshivas in Artzeinu Hakedoshah, and one advantage of that is that it puts me in close proximity with other frum Yidden and their lifestyles. As the zman went by, I had the chance to meet a bochur who learnt in Chabad yeshivas, but he himself joined another chassidus (I didn’t ask why). Probably because he had experience both in Chabad and other places, and the fact that we both enjoy a bit of “hock”, one of the topics we got into was, “why, even today, is there still such a separation between Chabad and other kreizen?” He suddenly looked awkward, and presumably because he didn’t want to offend me, gave me a few cop-out answers, like “well, Chabad and everyone else are so different…”
After pushing him a bit, he said a few things that pricked my ears up. I do not know if what he said I am allowed to believe (al pi halacha), and the readers of what I am writing should not believe it either, but everything one hears and sees is a message from Hashem and a reason for cheshbon hanefesh. I hope I am wrong and am simply shooting my mouth off. Hopefully the harsh things I am about to write about are at best, non-existent and at worst, isolated incidents that have been blown out of proportion and misunderstood. Based on what he told me and my own new-found introspection on some things that I as a bochur in Tomchei Tmimim saw and heard, I came to a few realizations:
We will always have misnagdim, meaning people who will hate us (G-d forbid) and disagree with what we do. Anything holy has this problem in the golus, but as the Rebbe’s soldiers we have a responsibility to rise above that. One question we must answer for ourselves is, “how can we do Hafotzas Hamayonos properly and break down barriers if we are looking down on and are judgmental of the very people we are trying to connect with?” How many times have I heard fellow bochurim say about Litvaks that they are “snags,” or about members of other Chassidic dynasties that they are “yoelis” or “honkies?” How can we expect them to have derech eretz and express interest for our chassidus and our Rebbe, if we refer to their seforim as “just vertlach,” and to their leaders as “rebbelach?” This is not the fault of the bochurim who speak like this. What do you expect of them if that’s the way their mashpi’im talk, saying things like “going to another Rebbe is like going to the pope?” I was told of a situation in which a bochur was learning a chassidishe sefer (not Chabad) during seder, and the mashpia walked up to him and instead of saying something reasonable like, “this is a Chabad yeshiva and during seder you are to learn a Chabad sefer,” he said, “now is the time to learn some real Chassidus.” What about when someone who used to be “chassidish” and became Chabad is invited to yeshiva to tell his story, and he speaks about the hisnagdus that he got? What kind of a message is that sending to the bochurim? The message that it sends is that many non lubavitchers (and the speaker specifies which groups he got a “klap” from), hate us. Isn’t that loshon hora? Does it not implant feelings of resentment into the hearts of the listeners? How many times has the Rebbe mentioned Ein Tzoakin al Haovar? Are we forgetting all the kovod the Rebbe showed to other Gedolei Yisroel?
We always get upset when people call us “chabadskers” (not to mention loobies). Maybe we should keep that in mind the next time we refer to anyone with payos as a “poilisher.” “Poilisher” means from Poland. There are also Ungarishers and Galitziyaners. And then come the Torahs that haughty people use to bolster the ga’avah that they feel about “not being like those kugel-eating poilishers,” like the vort about how in siddur Ari it says “”,לעולם יהא אדם ירא שמים בסתר but in Nusach Sfared it says “לעולם יהא אדם ירא שמים בסתר ובגלוי”. Why? Because “Chabad mont pnimiyus.” As if “chassidishers” don’t! But who would think otherwise if everyone else talks about how “chassidishers” are into “chitzoniyus.” How do you think that those who daven nussach Sfard feel when their Holy nussach is being denigrated? (I am not speaking against the vort itself. I do not know enough to say whether it has a holy, credible source, and I do not want to be mezalzel in the Torah, G-d forbid. I just want to say that even if it is an Emeseh vort and the diyuk between the two nuschaos is verified, people can always twist it to be meganeh others G-d forbid, as it says in Hoshea: כי ישרים דרכי השם וצדיקים ילכו בם ופושעים יכשלו בם.
How do we as chassidim of the Rebbe expect to be accepted by everybody else if this goes on? We cannot continue carrying the Rebbe’s flag, the flag of heralding the geulah, and the flag of ahavas yisroel if the next minute we go behind closed doors and are mezalzel other frum Jews and their avodas Hashem? It is hypocritical. People are not stupid. These negative attitudes seep out. We all know the Chazal that says whoever sins in private gets announced upon in public. We cannot allow this to become a stereotype of Lubavitch. The same way other offenses (bullying, smartphones, shmiras hasdorim, etc) are dealt with severely in yeshiva, any bochur expressing these sentiments should be handled accordingly, because it destroys the very fabric of Yiddishkeit and what the Rebbe wanted and stood for. Would Itche der Masmid have become a chossid of the Rebbe Rashab if he thought that bochurim in the yeshiva think like this? It is not for us to judge anyone and to sniff out another group’s chisronos, especially if we want others to look at us favorably despite our imperfections. Every Yid has a kesher neshomoh to where ever he ends up serving Hashem, and there were 12 tribes, each one with its unique avodah. It takes all sorts to make the world go ‘round.
Besides for all the negativity this brings (as previously mentioned), I would like to point out the fact that if we fall into this trap, G-d forbid, it is very possible that we are missing golden opportunities not just in Hafotzas Hamayonos, but in our personal avodah as Lubavitcher Chassidim. How amazing would it be if we learn a little Divrei Yoel, find a horo’oh in it, and maybe even connect it to something the Mitteler Rebbe said? That’s not even on the table if we write Satmar off as “extreme.” Maybe we can learn from the exemplary chesed empire Satmar built? Few people had the unique ability of the Satmar Rov to love all Jews, even the ones he vehemently spoke out against. Instead of downgrading Litvaks as “snags” and thereby bringing a machlokes from 200 years ago into today, we should look at the kollel yungerman in Bnei Brak who lives on nothing and still learns Torah from dawn to dusk. Just as much as we are building a Dirah Btachtonim, he is also. Let’s learn from him. Let’s learn from Rav Chaim Kanievsky’s value of the spoken word, how he is careful not to say anything extra all the while running the entire Yeshivish world. Go to a tish sometime and look at how the Chassidim interact with their Rebbe. It is a lesson for how we should look at ours; it is a living lesson of what hiskashrus is. How do other talmidim of the Besht and their offshoots look at avodas Hashem and Toras Chabad? Maybe open up a Nesivos Sholom, or look at how the Toldos Ahron Rebbe zt”l explains a shtikel Tanya (his sefer is called Divrei Emunah.) What a worldview we could have and what an advantage to have in Hafotzas Hamayonos (why do you think Rav YY Jacobson is so popular?)! Apparently, the Rebbe himself had a chavrusa with Rav Tzvi Arye Rosenfeld in Likkutei Moharan. The Alter Rebbe met Rebbe Nachman; what came out of their meeting?
Middah Kneged Middah. Who knows if someone else will look at how we do kiruv and get inspired by it and channel it into his own avoda in his personal way? Maybe our chassidus will inflame a fellow Yid’s heart in yearning for their Creator. I call all my fellow Jews in general and my fellow Chasidim in particular to be vigilant in ahavas yisroel, especially at a time when all frum Jews and all ways of serving Hashem are crossing paths more than ever. Isn’t that what spreading the wellsprings is all about?
