41 Comments

• qkfngers

  You make some very sound and good points. You appear clear-headed and your ideas are thought-through. And so the simple question is: Why don’t you do it already. You’re obviously from the text in your 20s, you’re a “big boy”, so stop the Smicha program and go to school. You have put in your time in the System, you’re a good boy with a very strong chassidshe learning background (enough to land you a wonderful shidduch), if anything a secular high education and good job will significantly add to your prospects.
  So in closing, move on, go to school, stop lamenting over it, be proud, and JUST DO IT. Hatzlacha.
  Rivka

• ...

  Just like girls don’t NEED to go to seminary, boys don’t NEED to get smicha… You’ll get married iy”H, don’t worry… (even if you do decide to go to college)
  {Just btw, it sounds like you’re writing this to get people to agree with you, but… Op-ed’s aren’t exactly the best place to vent…}

• Chaim

  Good on you for sticking it through. A sign of maturity.

• Why are people so insecure?

  Chassidus teaches us how to be Pnimiyim – a wealth on the inside.

  SYSTEM: is for the majority, to grow in a haven of Elokos, and dedicate our early years to strict learning. This is to the extent of Mesiras Nefesh -even if it WILL actually make your life harder. BUT a pure life!

  After being married, where השרוי בלא אשה- כשרוי בלא חומה = Man w/o a wife is without a “Gourd.

  THIS IS THE PREMISES FOR OUR SYSTEM

  If you aren’t up to that, or kept it going till then, כה לחי! You will NOT regret it.

  NOW:
  if its too much, consult with a mashpia, can be you are not up to that level.

  Hate to brake it: NOT ALL LUBAVITCH IN USSR was on Mesiras Nefesh. (though the Frierdiker Rebbe, His father, and the Rebbe demanded it STANDARD)

  You DID the right thing till now, and WILL in the future if you maturely discuss with a close Chassidishe friend and your Mashpia.

• The Reason

  The reason that you’re in smicha is simple and has nothing to do with being a Rabbi. You’re in smicha since you want to be “a good bochur” and since you already invested years in the system, 1 more year just seems like a smart thing to do so you can say “I did it”. (the actual reason for learning smicha also has little to do with being a Rabbi out there, rather it’s about being a Rabbi in your own home).

  The reason you’re in smicha is because you feel like you’ll be disadvantaged if you don’t. BS. You won’t. True, the rosh yeshivas won’t want you for their daughters because you don’t have smicha, but is that who you want to marry? The person that you want to marry will have similar values to you and smicha will not be a make it or break it.

  The reason that you’re frustrated is that you’ve spent many years on something you don’t value (you value yidishkeit but not the exclusivity of it’s study) and you feel like you didn’t not have the opportunity to invest in your future.

  There’s hope.

  You’re still young. Don’t feel pressured to get married right away. 25/26 is not old anymore. Take the time now to decide what you want to do and get started. Get a GED and start research. There’s no reason why, after finishing smicha, you can’t get on track to prepare for the rest of your life. Don’t care about what they say.

  Good Luck!
  – Been there done than.

• Smicha WHY???

  You have many valid points and regarding the college idea, that is a question for your personal Mashpia to guide you what to do.

  The reason why many Lubavitch bochrim learn smicha is not necessary to become a Rav or go on Shlichus and use the smicha, the smicha is that IY”H when you will start a home and a question will arise you will have the basic knowledge to know that you have to ask a question. Just look and see why the rebbe encouraged us to learn smicha and you’ll have that question answered. It’s not for a better shidduch or to become a Rav…. it’s poshut to know “Hammase asher yassun” in your own home. Hatzlacha in all your endeavors.

• rebbe

  bs”d

  simple and plain – the reason you’ll seem like an “ois-varf” is b/c the rebbe said to get smichah. (besides going to collage, which you mentiond- another thing the rebbe was against(for sure before marriage))

  i hope this helps clear it up to you.

  ps.
  sorry if anything i typed offended/ hurt any one, i didn’t mean it and i hope you’l forgive me!

• ur wrong

  u have to learn the shulchan aruch to be a frum yid, which u mentioned u do want to be

  • Anonymous

    You are wrong. He did’nt say he that he plans on not being a frum yid according to Sulchan Aruch, rather that he does’nt want Smicha. A completely different track than “shulchan aruch to be a frum yid”.

• anonymous

  As a member of this yeshiva, I can assure you that most of the guys here are very motivated in their diligent and thorough study of yoreh deah with our excellent mahid shiur.

• A 17 year old Bochur

  Hi Yanki!

  I liked the way you wrote it, very clear.
  let me try to answer your both questions
  first about the importance on Smicha and secondly about learning in College.

  About smicha, if you are thinking it is only a title for rabinics or shlichus, well, that is wrong, the Rebe said everyone must be a Rabbi in his House, (so he will be capable of dealing with daily issues like for example bosor vecholov).
  So it is not about being a Rabbi or a Shliach.

  Now about College, there is a story witch i do not remember the details, it is about a bochur who asked, if i am not mistaken, to the Rebe about college, and he was tell to go all the way to Israel where he will ask his question to the chief Rabi of Kfar Chabad, before he entered the rabbi`s office, a lady with a chiken entered first, asking the Rabbi if the chiken was stil kosher after having swalow a needle.
  So the Rabbi started talking to the chiken, “Oy… my dear chiken, what have you done? in your house your owners always protected you and fed you, you had all what you needed for, but then you started to wander by other´s properties.You swallowed this needle and it pierced your stomach. Now I am obliged to declare you treife.”
  Listening to the Rabbi, the bochur realized that his words contained a lesson for himself as well.

  Hatzlocho!

• Bochur

  I sympathize and feel very sorry for you.

  Please don’t, however, portray your feelings upon others. I learned in Smicha in the past in that very institution and most guys definitely dont feel that way.

• We have a rebbe

  From what you wrote yanki smicha is not your problem.

  It’s none of my business but do you do chitas and Rambam ever thought what’s the point of that I mean you can’t even pasken halochod from the Rambam why learn it.

  The rebbe wanted EVERY bother to do smicha and unlike Rambam smicha has a very practical side as a bother learning smicha I don’t have to be the one to tell you this I’m sure you see it yourself, you say you want to lead a frum life style smicha gives you the tools for that.

  But that’s not the point according to what you are saying smicha isn’t the problem the gemmara is the problem I mean you are learning it for 12 years give or take and what can I or (unfortunately) any one can say they even remember from from it.

  The point I’m trying to make is in the 21st century chabad as a whole is missing one of the most fundamental things in Judaism אמונה the degree isn’t what’s gonna get you money (I mean just look at the numbers of college grads who aren’t getting any work)
  Having emunah isn’t for the big chassidim its for me and you and if you do what you have to do hashem will do what he has to do.

  Just my thoughts.

  A fellow bother who is in the “system”

• Just like you

  I went through the same situation (we’re actually only a year apart: I did smicha last year) and while I would love to go on shlichus, I recognize that that may not ever happen. Fact is, though, you feel much more accomplished every time you pass a test and thus you are more motivated to learn. It’s only a year, and having smicha helps you in the professional world. I know, because I’m now working a “regular” job (not in a mosad).

  Stick with it. Dropping out a few months before you’re finished won’t help you, and being a “Bachelor of Talmudic Law” or whatever will help you get into college.

• Avromie

  Please see lekitei sichos chalek Aleph from just a few weeks ago, Smicha is for live, not to be a Rabbi.

  Unfortunately there are many basic principles that are not taught in our yeshivos, this is one of them.

• Blessings

  to be able to deal with and even answer shilahs in your home and business, and to learn exactly HOW to ask a shilah effectively when need be is one of the purposes of learning for simicha the Rebbe once answered , i recall hearing…perhaps someone has more details ….you can specialize in learning laws of business, and other areas of Torah that coincide with your goals in life to help give you ” zitsfleich” and motivation with enthusiasm! BLESSINGS!

• Danny

  Yanky, you certainly have good writing skills for someone who has gone through the “system” and has not had a regular secular education. My question to you is, practicly, what are you suggesting? If your just looking to vent, then you wrote a great article. But from what I understood, you are suggesting that if a bochur is not planning on goin on Shlichus and is not interested in learning semicha, he should not feel obligated based on what is socially expected of him.
  It is very hard to change people’s perception. It takes a long time for social expectations to change. You have to do what is right for you at this (or any) point in your life with the guidance of a mashpia. If you have your mashpia’s blessings, you have the Rebbe’s blessing!
  I wish you much hatzlocho!

• Sara

  B”H

  You sound like a wonderful boy , and ver talented .
  If you haven’t been Academic until now , why in the world would you think of wasting your time going to college ? Do you know how many college graduates are without jobs or on realy low incomes . Parnasa is from Hashem He is the boss of this world . The Rebbe wanted bochrim to get simcha so there should be a rav in each home , that knows the halachos for a Jewish home . It’s great you have been in yeshiva trying to learn Torah the source of all brocha . Get your smicha and then get a job . Believeme a coledge education is much more of a waste of time then yeshiva . Use your creativity and
  talent to build a business . Get someone who has a
  brocha in business to menter you . My husband never learned English and is Boruch Hashem very successful in business . When he hires staff a college graduate is usually a negative they don’t have creativity or the spark of life that a chasidisha boy has .the world is changing , look around the most successful ones are the ones creating and using new technology . Hatzlacha
  Sorry for all typos I’m writing this on my phone don’t have time to edit .

• Just do it!

  From the way you’re writing, it sounds like you’re not happy with being in yeshiva (“ad mosai”) and want to get a start on your career. Great! You obviously know what you want! So what’s stopping you? Shiduch prospects? That’s ridiculous! If a girl won’t go out with you because you dont have your smicha, then obviously she’s not for you.
  I went through a similar thought process when I decided not to go to seminary, and instead go straight to college after high school; so in a way, I can relate. I also was thinking about what it would mean with regard to shiduchim. But in the end, you know what drove my decision? It’s really quite simple, almost cliche: follow you’re heart! Do what makes YOU happy! Not the community, not the shadchanim, not your friends, and not even your family. It’s your life and in the end, you are going to have to live with the consequences of your choices. So the question is, do you want to look back at your life and regret the choices you made, or do you want to look back and take pride in all that you accomplished?
  Wishing you the best of luck!

  • Learn the basic's

    One of the basic’s of Chabad is that the mind should rule the heart,
    your whole post is basically saying the hell with it

  • #19 to #20

    Not sure where you got that from. I implied nothing if the sort. All I said was that he should do what makes him happy.

• Ish Poshut

  The Rebbe encouraged Bachurim to get Semichah before they get married (I don’t think he was only speaking about those who planned on becoming pulpit Rabbis).

• Get Semicha

  I say do Semicha and when you’re done you’ll write another op-ed to let us all know how this helped you so much.
  1) as some have already pointed out, you will have prepared yourself for living a frum life in knowing when to ask the rov a shaala. unfortunately so many people are frum and censere but lack basic knowledge in simple bosor becholov that can make a big difference to the kashrus of your kitchen. 2) you will feel a sense of accomplishment. 3) You never know what opportunity comes your way. You may be an accountant but you have an opportunity to do hashgocha on the side. 4) You’ll give the Rebbe Nachas. The Rebbe wanted this so much of his chassidim…of all his chassidim…5) you’ll inspire your children one day iyh to do the same. 6) Your study of Torah now will bring you tremendous success…

  • Mom

    Very well said.
    If you are a chosid (halevai we should be worthy of that title), then first do what the Rebbe asked of you.
    If you are not yet, and also don’t want to be (CV”S) a chosid, then go do your own thing.
    But remember, the Rebbe cared for each one of us, and when he said a bochur should have smicha before the chuppah, he didn’t say tat so you should “suffer” another year. My son didn’t want to learn 24/7. He found a shlichus were he was given permission to learn for smicha at the same time.
    Make it work. And BTW, don’t think a college degree is the answer to all your woes. 10’s of thousands of dollars to get a BA, and then a masters, and there’s still no guarantee that the graduate will (1) get a decent job (2) get a job in the field he was trained for (3) be happy in the field he chose!
    IVDU ES HASHEM B’SIMCHA, get smicha – it’s not the paper that counts – it’s the practical halacha you will learn that will enable you to BUILD A TORAH TRUE BAYIS NE’EMAN B’YISROEL, rather than being like so many who have been swayed to the R”L Chabadlite due to lack of knowledge of HaShem. Hatzlacha

• shlome yosef

  to the author: please send your real name, age, and picture to the following email address…….

• Yakov Kirschenbaum

  BS”D

  I think it would be more helpful for the author to read this op-ed to his mashpia and discuss it with him than to post it online.

  Not every issue that a person has must become a complaint on Lubavitch, Crown Heights or “the system.”

• been there done that

  if you leave the system early you will slide down faster. one day you can find yourself in places you would never imagine…getting pregnancy tests for your non jewish girlfriend puking on the side of some club cause you just took something that almost ripped your stomach out etc. OF COURSE it does NOT have to be so dramatic BUT it does happen…stay in the system even if you bum around…cause once you out.. you are OUT. all of the lame excuses of ” i want to go to college” are just plane lame…you know why you want to leave. u know it very well. do you self a favor and stay in. Even if it seems lame now at the end of the day you will be doing yourself a huge favor. Any one who says do it for the rebbe or watever is kinda blind and frankly not with the program cause clearly you couldnt care less bout it. but for yourself and NOT for shidduchim or any other of the those :”accomplishments” stay in. Be a jew. a chabad jew at that

• scary

  that you, who you say did not learn, was there as a dugma chaya for our kids, on shlichus in a yeshiva!

  how long will this corruption, of everyone having to be a shliach, continue?

• Been there

  I went thru the system many years ago. Unlike you I stayed in one place & did learn. However when it came to smicha I just learned bossor becholov & taruvos & did not get actual smicha. I also learned quite a bit of orach chaim. When I became 22 my mashpimim told me that they thought I should go to work since I was getting a bit lax in my learning so I asked the Rebbe & he said it would be a good idea. I found a job & went to work. I would advise you to go to work or if you feel that you want to go to college make sure that it is a men’s only place & that it has a Jewish outlook.

• Yossi

  I followed a similar path as you — Yeshiva and Smicha — and went to college after I finished with my Smicha.

  The main reason for learning the various portions of halacha that comprises a Smicha program is to be able to ASK a question that arises to a rabbinical authority.

  A Smicha certificate doesn’t grant you the power to “pasken” a question — you need a furtherance of that learning e.g. “Dayanus” — only to be able to directly ask the question you may have.

  That you feel you cannot sit still for so long and learn is unfortunate. College classes are long, and you generally must take notes to refresh your mind when studying for finals later on in each semester. If you can’t sit in a shiur for too long without feeling bored or becoming disinterested, you may be in for a rude awakening when you hit secular studies…

  Good luck!

• reason for smicha

  the reason for smicha is not to be a rabbi, but to know how to run a nice kosher home

• System

  Boruch Hashem it was a pleasure to read most of the responses given here. They were good clear answers w/o all kinds of denigrating remarks etc.

  Just one comment to Yanki. Substitute Derech Hachayim for the word “system” and it would reflect more accurately what you call the “system.” It becomes a system when the yeshivois become a one size fits all and don’t realize that the curriculum and material to be covered should to a degree be more individualized.

  Wishing you Hatzlacha Rabboh bakoil

• SEE #27

  would be good if you could write your name, this is the most authoritative answer here!

• levi

  if you had a hard time sitting through school. how do u expect to sit through college? it is not eaSIER!
  IF U HAVE NO ZITZFLEISH FOR SITTING AND LEARNING, THEN USE YOUR HANDS FOR A TRADE, ….

• honest read

  I admire your honesty with yourself and the system. I think that if you feel you would like to go to college, go ahead and start with a few courses to get “your feet wet”, and find a field that interests you. You can start with a 2 yr associates degree in a practical field for instance. Regarding your smicha, if you can/want to stay perhaps you can even find a way to do both. I think there are options if one thinks “outside the box” a bit. There are also institutions which will give you college credit for learning done in smicha. There are organizations out there that have more info about this and can help. And one last point if you are a mentch, that will B”H find you a good shidduch and not only the fact if you have smicha or not. At least that’s what I’d look for in a person

• Mendy

  You may end up using your smicha for something. Ask people what they do for a living?
  9 out 10 will tell you ” I never thought I’ll be doing this………”
  Never say never!

  Hashem will lead you the way!

• serel chana maness

  L MUST TELL YOU HOW MUCH PRIDE L HAD WHEN MY HUSBAND SAT AND LEARN UNTILL HE COMPLETED SEMICHA.THAT’S ANOTHER THING THAT MATTERS,RESPECT,NOTHING IS TAKEN FOR GRANTED

• rabahjack

  What you are looking for doesn’t exist in the system. You need to go to college get a degree and earn an honest living. You can be a fine frum person in college. the alternative is…sit around and be afraid what the next guy will say. “al Yovesh mipnay hamaligim” the Mishna states very clearly “one who dosn’t teach their children a trade is teaching them how to steal” from others or from food stams etc.

• Been There

  Yanky,
  I agree wholeheartedly and can attest to the fact that college after marriage is very difficult.
  Practically, I would suggest Smicha but maybe start studying for your GED and researching colleges. I recommend Touro!

• Straight Torah

  The rambam says one should have a living BEFORE marriage, so I agree with you. I do not understand what goes on and why, but I’m baffled by it.

• Ed Greenberg

  It’s not the smicha, it’s the education that goes with it. Consider the learning as an investment in your spiritual self, as long as you don’t eliminate the opportunity to later on go to college and earn a secular degree in somehing that interests you and will give you a parnassa that you will enjoy.

  Many people would love to have that Jewish education. You can get it while you are young and a good learner.