INBOX: The Realities of Hachnosas Orchim

Dear Friends,

Baruch Hashem, Crown Heights is a vibrant and welcoming community, the heart of Chabad and a home to 770, a place that draws people from all corners of the world. It’s a zechus for us to live here and to play a role in hosting so many visitors. But as the influx of guests continues to grow, it’s important to reflect on the realities of hachnosas orchim and how we can ensure this mitzvah is approached with sensitivity, mutual respect, and appreciation.

Hosting is not a simple matter. It requires physical, emotional, and financial investment. Every meal served, bed prepared, and space shared is done with love and generosity. But hosting comes with real costs—groceries, cleaning help, laundry, and more. For many Crown Heights families, especially the elderly, young couples, or families with small children, the constant hosting can be a significant burden.

To our beloved guests: We love that you visit Crown Heights, whether for a Pegisha, Kinus Hashluchim, C-Teens, or other meaningful events. Your presence adds to the energy and vitality of our community. But please understand the immense effort it takes for families to host.

Here are a two considerations to keep in mind:

1. Be Realistic and Thoughtful: Before asking to stay with a host family, especially for extended periods, consider the impact. A short stay is understandable, but long visits can strain even the most generous hosts.

2. Express Gratitude Tangibly: If you are lucky enough to be hosted by a family, show your appreciation. A heartfelt “thank you” is important, but tangible expressions of gratitude go a long way. Instead of gifts that need to be displayed or challah covers, consider practical ways to express your thanks. For example, a gift card to a local grocery store or assistance with household expenses can make a meaningful difference.

To the Crown Heights community: It’s okay to say no when hosting is too much. Hachnosas orchim is a tremendous mitzvah, but it should never come at the expense of your family’s emotional or physical health or overall well-being. Communicating boundaries with kindness and clarity is an act of self-care and honesty.

To all of us, guests and hosts alike: Let’s approach this mitzvah with sensitivity, understanding, and respect for one another. May our efforts strengthen our community, bring nachas to the Rebbe, and continue to inspire achdus and ahavas Yisrael till the coming of Moshiach speedily.

With blessings for good news,
A Crown Heights Family