It is quite shocking that the knee-jerk reaction of the Jewish community is automatically conditioned to be appalled at accusations and feel sorry for the accused without first thinking for even a moment about the horrendous implications for the victim.
Op-Ed: In Support of the Victim
It is quite shocking that the knee-jerk reaction of the Jewish community is automatically conditioned to be appalled at accusations and feel sorry for the accused without first thinking for even a moment about the horrendous implications for the victim.
Let me back up a second, that is if the accused is another member of the K’lal of course. However, if the same victim is abused, attacked or molested from a secular Jew or a non-Jew then of course they are believed immediately and there is uproar in the community. How dare they touch one of our own? How dare they violate this entire community?
Did I say shocking? Truly I meant reprehensible. It is still the same ben or bas Yisroel who was violated, humiliated, hurt, abused, used, disgraced, harassed, threatened and victimized; and by turning a deaf ear and a blind eye to their pain and their truth YOU, yes ALL of YOU, their brothers and sisters, neighbors, friends, teachers, mechanchim, Rabbonim and role models who choose NOT to believe them, are victimizing them all over again. You not only double their pain, you compound it over and over again on a daily basis – each and every one of you who doesn’t believe them, and worse, who supports the abuser.
You so nonchalantly make obtuse comments like “look who the accuser is…” so why don’t we take a look at who the accusers are? But first lets take a look at who the abusers are. What do you think an abuser looks like? Do you think an abuser walks around with a sign on them that says “Be smart, stay away from me, I am an abuser”? Do you think an abuser has a certain look about them? Do you think they LOOK like the scum of the earth that they are?
An abuser looks like… a father, a brother, a neighbor, an uncle, a cousin, a friend, a grocer, a baker, a sofer, a plumber, a school bus driver, a rebbe, a singer, an accountant, a lawyer, a computer geek, an author, an artist, a cop, the person that sits next to you on the bus, the train or next to you in shul. It could be anyone and there is no way for you to know from the way they look, the way they speak, or the way they act in public. So just because you know the accused you can’t vouch for them in any way, shape or form. Because you are NOT with them 24/7; you are NOT their shomer, and you are not in their head.
Would you have believed that the Principal of your child’s yeshiva would be abusing his own daughters at home; not only he but his sons as well? Lets understand this and understand that this happens. It really happens even though we don’t want to believe this. It is a horrendous thing to think about and to have to believe about people. But there are countless numbers of children and adults who had gone through this in their own homes, who feared their own rooms and beds because of this.
A few years ago I spoke to a man from Williamsburg who was running for a political position. I asked him what he planned to do about the child abuse issue. He looked at me curiously. Then he said, “Some of my son’s best friends were molested.” I was shocked. He said it as if it was a right of passage and an accepted form of child rearing. I of course asked, “You knew your son’s friends were molested and you did nothing?” I was shocked.
Let’s understand that what happens in the outside world happens in our world too. We are all human and our people succumb to yetzer horah the same as all human beings do. We are afflicted with the same illnesses as outside our society. And just because it hurts us and it feels dirty and makes us uncomfortable we can’t just ignore it in hopes that it will go away. It doesn’t go away, it gets worse. If we really want it to go away, we have to acknowledge it, address it and work on it to make it go away.
So now let’s look at the accusers, the victims. Abusers never choose victims that anyone would believe. Get it? Let me say that again, abusers/molesters choose their victims very, very carefully. They look for the most vulnerable victims. Who would you believe if they came forward? Would you believe the Rosh Yeshiva’s child? Probably, right? That’s why they would never prey on the R”Y’s children. Would you believe the children of the wealthiest man in the neighborhood? Those kids are pretty safe. Would you believe the kids from the most dysfunctional family in the neighborhood? No? Why not? Oh, you would say, the family is all mixed up, the kid is probably lying. That is the kid he befriends. That is the kid he grooms and goes after, because he knows that if the kid tells, no one will believe him.
How do you feel now about not believing the child? How do you feel now about being tricked by the abuser even before he attacked the child? He was thinking about YOU first. He was thinking about how to fool YOU before even choosing the victim. His thought process was first how to FOOL THE OLAM so he can get away with it.
That is the mindset of the molester. He plans everything out. He plans about tricking all of his supporters, and he plans on molesting his victims. He doesn’t just do it happenstance. He is a phony, a pretender, a trickster and monster. But YOU think you know him, not the molester of course – the one he pretends to be. You can fool some of the people some of the time but you can’t fool Hashem. Hashem is all-seeing and all-knowing. Da Lifnei Mi Atah Omed! We all stand before Hashem 24/7. HE does not take vacation, lunch breaks or coffee breaks. He sees everything. And without a doubt he does not turn away for 20 minutes while these so called “tzadikim” and “choshuve” people do their dirty crimes. HE will not forgive or forget like YOU are all so willing to do.
There is a reason why more and more victims/survivors are gaining the courage to come forward, and that is only because Hashem is imbuing them with that courage. Without Hashem’s help there is no possible way that they could do it. Without their emunah and bitachon that Hashem would help them, there is no way that they would risk exposing themselves in such a fashion. What do they gain from this? Do you ask yourselves this? Why are they coming forward? To save other children from these monsters, to put them out of business and to save others from going through the nightmares and torture that they themselves went through. Could you do that? Could you be such a hero? Yes hero, because they have suffered terrible repercussions for doing what they are doing. Would you want your personal business exposed for all to see? Do you think it is an honor to walk around with a flag that proclaims “I am a victim or survivor of abuse”? Do you know how emotionally damaging being victimized like that is? Do you have any idea how one’s world is turned upside down by such trauma? Try to imagine just being frightened by someone breaking into your home and then magnify that a million times. Would you enjoy being controlled, abused, manipulated and threatened and being forced to keep that all to yourself with no one to turn to? Now imagine that it was your innocent young child going through that and you not even knowing. These victims/survivors are putting themselves on the line to try and save YOUR kids from it happening to them.
Personally I take tremendous offense to all the shmutz and lies that are made up to smear the reputation of these victims/survivors. Personally it makes me sick when people vouch for the abusers even though they don’t know them and certainly cannot vouch for them because they weren’t there when the abuse took place. Only the abuser and his victim were present and the only other witness was Hashem. Of course, as each victim of the same abuser comes forward, it becomes more and more ridiculous when the community finds more reasons to find fault with the logic that we must protect others from him, but finds reasons to back him and call the victims liars. The ridiculous question is “were is the evidence?” The evidence is the eyewitness reports from the victims. Do you really think the molester is going to invite guests to watch what he does so there can be witnesses or leave evidence behind? Does a thief leave a thank you note at the bank he robs?
The bottom line is this. Our children are way too important to play this very dangerous and foolish game. Adults with this illness have a choice. They can get help for themselves before they go out and hurt innocent victims, or they can act on their taivos and hurt others. That is their choice.
Victims have no choice. They don’t choose to be victims. They don’t ask to be abused and victimized.
We as a society have a choice too. WE can face the truth and support the victims in these cases and teach ALL these abusers that WE will prosecute them to the fullest extent of the law. This will send a clear cut message to all those with the same inclination to get help for themselves and stay away from our kids – because we will believe the kids and we will NOT protect the molester, we will remove them from society no matter who they are.
get rid of them
very well said
there are roshe yeshivos in ch ( no nemes but i am well aware of how they abused boys when i went to the masgiach in ohelie torah he never did anything
no when i threatened them with a lawsuit because my therapist said it wouyld help he was removed from being around boys but now when i go to 770 i still see him being treated with respect
what should one do
Chaya G
SOOO sad!
yasher ko-ach
Yasher Ko’ach
true words
very strong ,passionate words–and very very true,and very very painful for all.the child who is abused, the abuser who was probably abused and suffered, and the abusers family ,who ,like the victim are innocent.
my child wass abused and suffers, but i wonder what good will it do at this stage to after the abuser??my child doesnt want to re-open the whole story and watch the mans family be destroyed.and yet my child is destroyed,though you wouldnt know it by looking at him.he is getting all the help possible and we do believe him and would prosecute if he wanted aor agreed.we need a big yeshua-all of us
Emotional support is everything
An abuser has a public persona and a private persona. The public persona is easy to maintain, as the abuser is able to fake social skills and “niceness” for limited amounts of time. The abuser is pleasant to outsiders and to his family in public. But he cannot and won’t want to maintain the facade of good emotional health for a sustained amount of time in private. His friends only know his public persona, however, and when word gets out that he is an abuser, they are confused and might not believe it. Abuse is confusing. But the public, which means relatives, friends, neighbors and acquaintances, have to realize they only know what the abuser puts in front of them to see and hear.
For the abused, emotional support is everything. To be shunned, and badmouthed, and not believed, on top of what they endured – is devastating.
well written
i hope this is also talking about emotional abuse, which is scary, dangerous and emotionally crippling. let those abusers stop preying on innocent victims for once!!! (especially family members)
to #1
Your ending question ahs already been answered multiple times.
Contact the Police and DA and Comm Watch and file complaints/charges.
If you were abused by someone: chances are others were also abused.
Once word gets out, the others will hopefully come forward too and press charges.
Then, the abuser will be known and all his victims will have their day in court. And hopefully he will not be treatyed with respect and honor in shul etc.
But if you stay silent; none of this can occur.
too # 1 and 4
Report it to crown heights watch.
A Mother
To true words said,
I unfortunately was put in the position of your thoughts. Why revisit this horrible thing, let’s move on, not hurt the abuser and his family. Instead take care of my abused child and focus on his healing rather than his suffering. Take him to the best doctors, psychiatrists and move on Right? No WRONG WRONG WRONG !!!
We made that mistake, decided not to confront the abuser and his parents, thinking what good will come of hurting them and telling them what their son did. Boy did we err. And on the soul of our son . Because that was part of his healing and closure and we denied him that . Maybe out of selfishness, embarrassment I don’t know but by pushing this ugly horrible episode under the rug we did more harm to our child than you could ever understand. Today my son is a broken hurt child in an adult body trying to heal himself and get better. His life is an uphill battle but he is working hard at it and I know he will succeed. But please believe me hiding the facts is NOT the solution. It’s dangerous and harmful.
Protecting the abuser is a crime. Who knows if he didn’t harm more innocent children and by keeping quiet you are part of the crime. By not revealing the abuser because he comes from such a respectable family and who would believe it is certainly not the right approach.
Til today since my son did come forward with proof and solid evidence people still doubt him and his accusations. They ask me doubtingly that’s really not true right? Guess what it’s almost as painful as the abuse when people doubt the truth and can’t believe it because they are such nice people and would never have such a child that could do such monstrosities . People it’s time to wake up and confront these atrocities and DEAL with them. A Mother
@ # 1
To Commenter # 1
You say “no nemes but i am well aware of how they abused boys”
and then further down you say “but now when i go to 770 i still see him being treated with respect what should one do”
What one should do, to start with, is NOT say something like “No Names” It is because people like you choose not to SAY who they are that they continue to be treated with respect! They are treated that way because people do NOT know their names, because people like you say things like “No Names, but how terrible”
If names were used, those people would no longer be able to walk in our shchunah with their heads held up high. YOU, yes, YOU help them do that by not naming names. You cant say things like “what should one do, while saying things like ”No Names” Shame.
to #4
What about the next boys he abuses?
I realizes it’s hard, but please DO come forward so you’ll stop him.
Nachliel Bamos
Thank you for this much needed response. A criminal is a criminal with a title before his name or not.
Wow!!! Can-t agree more!
Very well written. Very true and to the point!
NEVER NEVER let down the cry of a potentially abused child or adult. Many adolescent boys/girls might be victims as well of very well looking individuals.
I see the lack of Tznius of both genders as a direct consequence of the cover-up of all various forms of abuse in our midst.
You want to see the level of Tznius improved? Don’t say a word about it any more. Put ALL the effort to eradicate abuse in all its forms from our community, then you will slowly start noticing improvements in Tznius as well.
You see, the “heavy chassidic garb” has been for way tooooo long a comfortable cover up for so many. To so many of us, it is a easy reminder of the abusers that still walk freely in our streets. The different types, from “voyeurs” to actual moplesters and abusers.
Such a Sofek (doubt) should always be “lechumra”! When a child or adult reaches out to you, never doubt him/her. listen and support them as possible.
If we can reach transparancy in our values and moral behavior, it will also influence our level of modest dressing bez”h.
money and power equals easy abuse
article suggests children of rich and famous are more protected. wrong. reality is otherwise. in our circles, the rich and famous are some of the worst perpetrators. that’s part of the reason why there is so much cover-up, because they have the power and influence to enforce it.
U Know who
Lubavitch London UK Hanholah and members of the Lubavitch so called community and mostly the people that consider themselves true shluchim and Chassidim still stand very firmly publicly and privately by the side of abusers and totally ignore and bad mouth the victims and victims family’s,
mendel
I was abused by two rabbis in Lubavitch school,(1973/4/5 )I was then abused by an older bocher in Lubavitch yeshiva (1981) who’s name has recently appears on Crownhightswatch with more them 30 other victims and now my daughter was abused by a Lubavitcher good friend of mine 2000
I have had enough of Lubavitch I know it’s all corrupt
Another side of the story
Btw there r pple out there who have vendettas against others and choose to wreck their reputation by making up lies. I personally know of of such a situation. The accuser went online and googled a story and made it his own in order to take revenge… Don’t believe everything u hear…
There but for the grace
Did anyone ever wonder why Hashem makes people have such problems as being born with cognitive and/or physical disabilities, with emotional or financial problems, or those who are abused? Isn’t it to test teh rest of us, to see what our reaction is going to be – to help those more unfortunate, or to not believe them and not support them, or by shunning them? There is a saying: There but for the grace of G-d go I. What does that mean? It means that it could have happened to anyone, and Hashem decided to make it happen to someone else and not you! Be thankful! And now, respond: Hashem wants to see who will be helpful or who will not; who will make fun of the unfortunate or who will be tune and offer help, whether emotionally supportive help, babysitting help, financial help, or any kind of help at all.
to number sixteen- please read
Before you generalize on the entire Lubavitch, know that you experienced abuse 4 times and that there are thousands of amazing, devoted teachers who spend hour-less time and patience with students.
Before you say that Lubavitch is corrupt, know that there are thousands, THOUSANDS(!!!!), of strong supporters to Lubavitch who believe that Lubavitch is amazing (which it is).
I am sorry that you happened to have experienced negative activities that coincidentally happened from Lubavitchers but please do not generalize like that.
Do you know how many teens are reading comments? If even one teen happened to read your comment and say “Oh my goodness! Lubavitch IS corrupt!” it would be your fault.
And why? Because you are venting out your anger on a website.
So next time you want to go saying that Lubavitch is corrupt, say it to someone who wont get affected.
to number eight
stop making up reasons why Hashem created people with disabilities. You dont know why. Keep your mouth shut. Thank you.
SIC SIC SIC
THAT IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU START ACCUSING INNOCENT PEOPLE AS WELL, SIMPLY BECAUSE THE ACCUSERS HAVE THEIR PERSONAL GRIPES AGAINST CERTAIN PEOPLE. AND BY ACCUSING OTHERS IT COVERS UP THEIR OWN ABUSIVE ACTIONS. I SPEAK ON BEHALF OF SEVERAL INNOCENT PEOPLE BEING ACCUSED W R O N G L Y!!!!
to number 20
You look stupid so keep your face shut!!!
Why pick on Lubavitch
To nos 15 & 16:
You know, I also had an incident in Lubavitch, where a well-respected shaliach blamed the victim. But, I did not generalize this as being a Lubavitch problem.If you ever heard of Dov Hikind, this is something that plagues ALL of the “Frum” velt. Take a look at the websites of abuse activist, “Nachum Rosenberg.” So, why pick on Lubavitch?
But before you think it’s any better in the Fry velt, I was abused there, years before becoming Baal T’shuvah.
ooops! this is number twenty!!
oops i meant to comment number 18 not 8.
Oy Vei
To 19 & 23
I hate that come back “it happens ells where” I was brought up to believe that we Lubavitch is the best, but i now see that we are no different to any other Jewish organizations, in fact we offer much less to our own then any other chassidish kehillahs.
It reminds me of the saying “the shoe maker go’s with out shoe’s” we (sorry in the Lubavitch that i was brought up in) they preach Ahavas Yisroel but have absolutely no Idea what it is
But no shortage of Ahavas Momoine, they even spat out one of their own after 40 plus years, and you think that teens don’t see wrong in that
You say how many teens are reading the comments, Oh Please they read such comments and what, what about the teens seeing, feeling and being discarded by certain schools or mechinas that they feel unwanted scum, and this go’s on a daily and yearly basis, (at least were I live) and this has been going on for 30 years and still go’s on, and worse still all in the Rebbes name
However now I do mix more with other chassidisher frum yiden and see that In my personal Lubavitch they have nothing to offer ME not b’gashmiuse or b’ruchniuse UNLESS I have money to offer them
Frum criminals
When “frum” people, even well-respected Rabbsnim commit a criminal act, is that a problem with the Religion or the person?
Look at Alisha Ben Avuyah (Rabbi Meir’s teacher and mashpia), a Cohen Gadol off the derech when he got into hi 80’s, etc.
Okay, let us know
To 25:
Okay, I’m all ears. You mix with other Chassidisher Yidden. Please, let us know which one(s) have the most to offer. We want to be comfortable too. Maybe we’ll be happier that way.
You know, maybe you should read some of Meir Kahane’s (HY“D) publications or hear his tapes. What attracted even non-frum Yidden to Kahane was his ability to inspire a sense of self-sacrifice for the good of Klal Yisroel, even if that mean’t going to jail! Yet, members (young teens, even women) would go to this extent.
BTW, it’s because of Rabbi Kahane that Jewish inmates can get Kosher food, because when he was in Jail, he knew the law, and was able to convince the authorities that they had a legal obligation to provide this.
Now, the Rebbe did not hold from many of Kahane’s violent tactics, especially against Soviet diplomats and other interests (felt it made things worse). Nevertheless, what makes Lubavitch (maybe can include Breslov) different than the rest, is compelling members to sacrifice the comforts of a large American Jewish community (e.g. Crown Heights, Boro Park, Williamsburg, etc.) and go to Jewish Communities, bereft of Yiddishkeit, and make it glow, even in third world countries, which is not very comfortable.
What does it say in Pirkei Avos, ”If you are in a place where there are no men (meaning righteous people) you be the example. So, my friend, are there serious problems in Lubavitch, of course there is?! But rather than running away from it (you might not be happy about other problems elsewhere), why not be an idealist and see if you can help rectify it?
mendel
#27 I read your comment last night however before replying I wanted to think about it
Re kahana, well please forgive me but no comment on that.
Re you comment,,,,You mix with other Chassidisher Yidden. Please, let us know which one(s) have the most to offer. We want to be comfortable too. Maybe we’ll be happier that way. I mix with satmer and now certain Rabbonim and friends from satmer convinced me to spend my time learning, my chavrusa is a gurer chossid a rosh Kolel and truth is I am really enjoying learning, now although similar things go on in all other chassidim and yiden bichlall, but we had the Rebbe and when I see a whole community dissolve because of inadequate shluchim and that their whole focus is money this angers me, so after many years trying in many different ways of making children’s rally’s at my expense as the shluchim are to busy and then being asked by one of them to pay for the use of the shul for the rebbes work, and various other activities, and in reality one could see by the vast amount of places empty in the shul, that at one time you where lucky if you had a place at the corner of a table to me that is a sign of a problem, so now I want to do the Rebbes work and I have been given an opportunity by a gurer chossid in another area, and I have now heard by 3 different people that the main shliach has been spreading the word that we will not last, and they should not help us, why, as one of his big donors father in-law lived next door and passed away so we asked if they would like to donate a bimah, a seforim shaffer or just seforim, now they think will take him away, it’s all about money, nothing to do with the Rebbe, and this money thing has taken over most shluchim from doing the Rebbes work, however one shliach that all shluchim should learn from is Reb Mule Azimove of Paris, to him it makes no difference if you have 5 euro or 5 million, you will always get the same smile and greeting from him and the proof that he is doing the Rebbes work by the amount of chabbad centres the Rebbe has through his Ahavas Yisroel.
So for me the hurt of shluchim(where I live ) not having true ahavas yisroel and watching them destroy what was once an amazing Lubavitch community has become unbearable and for health and mind relaxing reason’s I have to turn away from Lubavitch
27 replies to Mendel
You know, my Zaide, HY“D (murdered in Aushwitz), may have been a Satmar Chasid. Before the Satmar Rav moved to Satmar, he was first the Rav in a town close by, so my Zaide used to visit him. Listen to this: Pinny Korf’s brother told a Satmar Chasid (maybe former, he was clean-shaven) about the beard incident. He replied like this: ”I know what they did to your brother. It was worse than that. But you don’t know Satmat. In Satmar you have people who are beheimas, but you’ll find that the majority are wonderful people that you can get along with.“
Let me ask the same question. Some shluchim have been a turn-off, but what about the majority? Is it fair to abandon a movement that exhausts itself to reach out to so many lost Jewish souls, worldwide, just because of some bad apples?
Now, Satmar and the other Chasidic groups are wonderful, don’t get me wrong? How they help each other is surreal.
But, let me end off with this: A non-Lubavitch Chasid once asked my opinion about the Rebbe being Moshiach. I said like this: ”Let’s talk about two Rebbes. One Rebbe looks out for the welfare of his Kehilla and keeps them Frum, very important and laudable. The other Rebbe goes after people who know nothing, baal taavahnicks – you know, pork eaters, beach-goers, womanizers, etc. He convinces these people to give up their taavahs and live a life of Torah. Who’s the better candidate for Moshiach?“ He said, ”I hear you.“
By the way: today’s Satu Mare, in Romania (known as Szatmar when it belonged to Hungary), has two meanings depending on who you ask. The Satmar Chasidim say it means ”S. Mary.” But the Romanians will say no, it means the Big Village(Satu – village, Mare – big).
Court of the Land or Gd, Take Your Pick!
Don’t worry, the cases of every victim in America are currently being prosecuted in the court of Gd…..a drought and famine that affects everyone will change everything for everyone, including the victims…..as long as it does not affect you, no need to worry, right!!! Gd will be more than happy to let it affect you!
For every victim, it says, vengeance is mine, saith the L-rd. If you are unable to prosecute in the court of the land, and we all know who rules in the land, prosecute in the court of G-d. We know who rules the court of G-d!
Justice is G-d’s soapbox theme!
What Goes Around, Comes Around!
By the way, I find it interesting that while America chose not to protect her victims, she became a victim!
Sin is sin no matter where you go!
Mendel, while Lubavitch says no to leaving under such circumstances, that is a step in the right direction for healing. You will always be welcome back by the true shluchim and community!!!
You need to leave to see and experience different things and to broaden your perspective, grow, and learn what is really truth and what is not! Just don’t slam the door!
All religions can become tools of manipulation and you need to learn the difference! And, when you see it again in the future, you will know to immediatley run!
When you leave the shluchim behind, be sure you do not leave Gd behind. You can live without the shulchim, but you will die without Gd! Remember, Gd didn’t hurt you, man hurt you! Gd has wanted the best for man, and child, from day one.
Scripture talks about Gd being your counselor….put all things Jewish behind and read your text for what it says with no commentaries, no opinions, no arguments….just your text. If you need clarification on a portion, chew on it for a while and ask Gd to open your eyes. Become your own teacher and let Gd become your Gd!
Gd is the master physician, He can, and He will, heal you inside and out, if you allow Him! He is the master of cleaning up the messes of man! Let him become your master…..the one that will never hurt you or your family. He might ask for a sacrifice here and there or an unexpected obedience, but He will never harm your or let you do it alone!
Walk with Gd, not the Shulchim. And please remember, there are some good ones out there who love you dearly…as if you were their own child whom they would never hurt. Let them love you one day!
Finally, the hardest point to understand and accept….even though they have done what they did to you, Gd still loves them as much as He loves you! And, He will bend over backwards for them just as He would for you in accord with His covenant!
To a victim, this is the worst sin anyone could experience and it shakes one’s mind to believe Gd would allow it to happen without immediate judgment. But, He does! So, to Him, this sin is no more earth-shattering than any other sin and He is not stopping the world because of it (at least not yet)! (He only released the children of Israel from Pharaoh when the cries of all of them reached Him.)
So, keep in mind, when you or I sin, our sin is also heinous in Gd’s eyes. And, because you are hurt, you do not have a license to ignore the law of Gd. In fact, if you do, Gd will come after you Himself and it will not be pretty!
Finally, while you think those who harmed you are getting off scott-free, please know, they are not! Gd has a way of putting them in a slow-cooker that makes their lives a living hell until they are miserable every moment of every day until they either repent and restitute or they die!
May Gd bless you and your family!
mendel
to 27/29 Let me tell you that my family and I have had it very tuff over the past 7 years and if not for Satmer I would not even want to think were we would be, I am a Lubavitch from birth and they helped us and look after us as their own, and I know satmer has their politics and all ells, but they also have another side their love to help another hiemishe yid is incredible. To 32 May you be blessed with all good,
I 100% agree with you my belief in H.K.B.H has increased two fold, I have recently written a book of my life(not for publication) flowing a suggestion by a Talmud chochom I can see how the direction of my life has led me to where I am today and in turn has shown me how I need to lead my life, in helping others, and due to my life’s situations and experiences I can relate to and understand other peoples hurt and problems, the Rebbe has and will always be my Rebbe no matter were I go, my dream would have been to help other people and most importantly yidisher children as the Rebbe did, under the umbrella of a chabbad/Lubavitch moised but my yichus or lack of money would not allow that in the country I live, so I have been left with no choice but to follow the hand that H.K.B.H has sent me and to do the Rebbes work under a non Chabbad/Lubavitch umbrella, for example the place I have moved to is right opposite a catholic church and the catholic school has 15 Jewish children my first job is to open a Sunday school for them to know and understand their Jewish roots and who they are, that was a number 1 that the Rebbe wanted to save yiddisher kinder, but this shliach seems to be worried more about his donors then these Yidisher children, to me this is heartbreaking, my son spent shabbos in the area we used to live he came back and tells me people in Lubavitch are saying I’m doing this for the money, well there is no money, I have no money at all but I have H.K.B.H Torah and the Rebbes teachings and very clear direction for wich I am very happy, and although it may be a little later in my life, its never to late. So all I ask, to the people who know me and know what I’m talking about, to leave me alone stop bad mouthing me or in fact any one ells and let’s do the Rebbes work. (I include my self in the last part.) may you all be blessed with a L’shonah Tova U’mesukah and all be zoicha to the true and ultimate G’ulah
Divine punishment to perpretrator
To 32 and 33:
Like I wrote before, I was very angry when the Rav blamed the victim (not me, but a vulnerable family member). What really got me the most was because the perp took advantage of someone defenseless.
Anyway, without getting into the details, the next day, the perp tripped and fell (no, not any kind of Mafia thing) and was bleeding profusely. Yes, I’ll say B”H, not so much that he would have needed emergency care. But I hope he got the Divine message
from 32
Mendel,
Thank you.
I must ask, what is more important–the Rebbe’s work or, like Abraham, doing as Gd directs? Maybe G-d would like for you to do Mendel’s work and not the Rebbe’s work!
Obviously, the Rebbe did not have what was needed to deal with these types of issues within leadership. Maybe Gd now needs a Mendel and not a Rebbe! Maybe not! Remember, every one of Gd’s leaders had flaws…some worse than others! Gd picks the oddest characters!
Sometimes, the hardest part is letting go of dreams and moving whole-heartedly in the new direction Gd opens. Leaving behind the direction of the Rebbe for Mendal’s direction may be necessary! Then you can create our own flawed work just like everyone else :)! Hopefully, your work will not have such putrid flaws!
Just remember the story of Dinah….
That said, may Abraham’s Rebbe bless and keep you!
Gd is real
#34 — America is now tripping and falling for the same reason!
Watch the 30-year drought….which could become a 40-year drought in America!
to #4-
We need to go after the abuser, because unless we do, he will repeat, repeat, repeat. Would your child’s therapist agree that it is not in the best interest of the child? If so, could he testify to that and contend that his patient should not be directly involved? It’s a terrible position, I’m sure. What have others done in a similar situation?
Has it ever been o.k.?
Unless the person standing behind the accused abuser thinks that the abuse is really not abuse at all, but some kind of natural phenomenon, I can’t imagine why they would be so cruel as to stand behind him if they view this as a crime. It is pathetic. But somewhere I read that this sort of behavior has a historical perspective different from the typical disdain. Can anyone speak to that? Has this behavior or any variation ever been viewed as acceptable according to historical Jewish information?