110 Comments

• i wish i could pay less...

  its about supply and demand. so the babysitter can ask for what they would like to be charged. it seems that people are desperate and end up paying whatever the babysitter requests. However as the consumer using this service we could refuse or try to find someone else if the price is not right. or we could as the consumers rally together and set a limit on what we pay.

  i’ve heard of this happening in another local jewish community when cleaning ladies where getting to expensive they collectively decided not to pay over a certain amount. it worked after after short period of time.

• Mom of 4

  Well said!!! I remember babysitting in the 90’s for $5 an hour! As a working mon who sometimes needs/wants to go out with my husband, I find it absurd that the going rate is $10/hr. people get paid $12 an hr to do real office work and earn money to pay their bills!! These are high school girls who, as the author says, most times are being paid to make sure the kids aren’t in a house alone (ie they are sleeping)

• baby sitters R us

  your pathetic
  baby sitters outside the community are making 20 a hour and cab fair home after the fact get a grip and pay your baby sitter

• Penina S

  I don’t think it is wrong to ask for a set compensation, because we are paying for their time, as well. Yes, it is admirable to volunteer, but often these girls are very busy and they are giving their time to help babysit. I have a job and I am paid by the hour, the same rate if it is a busy day or if i am manning an empty store and reading a book. You could consider some alternatives. Maybe set up to trade services with another mother or get together and pool with other families for one babysitter. Of course, each scenario has challenges, such as having all the kids in one place, but these are not insurmountable. If you feel you are not getting your money’s worth, maybe have a list of tasks the sitter could work on if it is a quiet night. But I still think her time is valuable, too.

• margaret

  MANY years ago in London, there was a group of girls who babysat in return for a gift or very little pay.I like to think that their kindness was not abused.We often did not go to simchas,or only a husband OR wife went.Perhaps there could be a sort of gemach,whereby a donation to a cause chosen by the sitter and a gift for her could replace high charges.

• I agree!

  I agree. When I was in highschool we got $3/hour. That included feeding, bathing and putting kids to sleep.
  Now I go to a simcha and it costs me $100 between some kind of gift and babysitting expenses.
  I think it needs to be a set thing. One babysitter quoted me $14 an hour!!!! Outrageous!
  They say a couple needs to have a date night. How are we meant to do that if just the babysitting costs so much?
  I think we need to find a solution to this problem. As it is, it’s hard to find a babysitter. Most of the girls won’t do “such petty jobs” or are afraid to miss out on some fun their friends may be doing. When you finally find someone, they make you broke.

• Great Idea!

  I think I should start putting these babysitters onto my payroll for taxes. Maybe when they’re paying taxes they’ll realize. I pay them more than what I make an hour. I only work because the little bit my paycheck brings in is more than nothing. But I get paid $10/hour and I work on the books.

  • C.H. Teenager

    In my opinion the amount a girl gets paid should depend on her age or how responsible the girl is, I don’t think it’s normal for someone (at least) under 17 to get more than $10-$11 an hour (depending on how hard the job was) although, regarding to what you said, if you have a daughter over 13 years, or when you have one, how about YOU pay for EVERYTHING she wants/needs until she can support herself with a full time job.
    ***By the way this is coming from a high-school girl who HARDLY gets babysitting jobs (and when i do, i usually charge $8 if the kid/s are sleeping and $10-$11 if they’re up) and yet I still pay for most of my own things because unlike some people in C.H. my parents cant afford to pay for everything of mine.

• Come on

  First of all u being a parent know that chalenge of dealing with children most of the time it is hard i know a 3 year old who locked the babysitter in the bathroom once the point is that just Becouse the baby is sleeping some times not always will he stay asleep and not always is the child sleeping to begin with. it is a very hard job and the little that we ask that u pay ( some times as u metiond) is not that much if u realy feel that u r paying to much then bring ur child to the simcha other wise stop complaining

• Been there-years ago

  In Borough Park, parents of young children take turns going out to local simchas – each staying for a while and then returning home. Parents are not allowing their daughters to babysit. Among other issues, there have been too many “stories”.
  V’hamayvin yohvin. Nobody wants to put their child at risk.

  Young parents here might consider doing the same.

• Crown Heights Mother

  I take babysitters on a regular basis for my 2 kids. Their responsibilities are little to none and they basically sit on the computer or their phone the whole night. It drives me crazy to fork out hundreds of dollars a month to the the same few girls knowing how hard it was for us to make it, and how easy it is for them to take take it! It also really bothers me when the sitters feel its above them to put away a couple of odds and ends the children were playing with so I don’t have to come home to a messy house at the end of the night. I try to hint it to them by saying things like “kids, after you color, everything has to be put away!” hoping the sitter will help them clean up with them. Little more I am afraid to suggest, in fear of angering the teenager that is sitting in my house with my kids and my possessions.

• :)

  I feel your pain, but keep in mind that it is a free market defined by supply and demand. I am sure if there were enough out of work babysitters out there, the rate would drop to $6/hour. Although, you may not be getting the most responsible/mature ones at that rate.
  Also, why don’t you try countering the “I usually get x amount” with “We can afford to pay you x, would you still be able to watch ‘Shloimie’ for a couple hours while you study for your next exam”?

• hi

  ummmm ok! another op ed about nothing. another kvetch! neeeeeext please! why is crown heights filled with such a bunch of whiners?

• coudnt agree more

  i cant agree with you more- i had a babysitter tell me she charges 10 if kids are sleeping and 13 if they wake up- i was nervouse at the thought of hiring her incase C”V my kids woke up!!! i pay my cleaner 11 an hour and she works extremely hard and does real house work- whenever we leave our kids with a babysitter they are alwasy in bed and sleeping- the babysitter is basicly being paid to use the internet in our home and yes of course make sure they are safe- im not even sure if they even go in to check on the kids since they are so involved on the internet- …maybe if we all come with a fair price that if kids are sleeping and its not a day time job- being a moms helper- it would be fair to pay 6 an hour without feeling bad!!!

• CM

  When you work you want to get paid, so do these girls. And no they do not want to get paid below minimum wage . Many of these girls come from families who are also struggling and they must buy many things themselves. So please stop being selfish and think about others. As a girl I cant tell you how many times I have done chesed and not been paid,and many of those families never appreciated it rarely saying thank you.

• ch res

  I asgree, Stop the madness

• Wake up call...

  Get real. It’s a rough world out there. There are no favors!

• Be sensitive towards others

  Maybe think for a moment that her family is struggling as well
  and she needs to earn money for things she wants
  other than absolute basics ( like going on a class trip
  that her parents can’t afford)

• Adam Smith

  But a girl citing her rate (I include those who use fancy words like I usually get ‘x amount’) always troubles me.
  —
  Welcome to the FREE MARKET! Our ancestors left the gehennom-holes we came from so we could live under the free market system.

  So long as the girls are competent and polite, they have every right to demand the going rate and to receive that rate. Are they less deserving than the illegal cleaning ladies who set rates and demand them?

  Babysitting is a service. The girls who do it need money too. They could be from broken homes, or from chinuch families where salaries are 6 months behind, or even just typical girls from large families that are struggling even more than usual thanks to the anti-free market government that is turning the US into a gehennom-hole of failure. They need to buy things for school or save to help pay for sem, etc, etc, etc.

  Unless your close friend’s daughter or sister is doing you a favor, or you’re a teacher who did so much for a former student that she feels she wants to repay you (not that you make her feel she owes you one, but that she really wants to help you because she looks up to you) – I have but two words for you:

  Pay up!

  Skimp on the gift if you have to – unless you feel that your children are worth less than the difference between an OK gift that will be appreciated and a slightly better gift.

  What’s more, these days you can get online and find a metziah on something interesting and useful that will cost you less and be worth more than what you were originally planning to give – and the difference will leave you with plenty to pay a decent price to someone who is watching those who should be regarded as your most precious assets.

• ummmm

  Yes you are being unreasonable…

  -a parent

• your wrong

  the rules of every gave are supply and demand. if that what they are getting, it must be worth that. otherwise, why are people giving it.

• Chaya L.

  Yes, you are being unreasonable. To a young girl, babysitting is her job. Whether or not she is busy with the children or relaxing on the couch, it does not matter, it is still her job. I dont think this has anything to do with how we raise our children. Would you tell your boss you would like less money because it is a slower time of year? I highly doubt it.

• op-ed...think agian

  Yes you are being unreasonable and unfair. girls who babysit should get paid atleast $10 an hour, and the parents of the babies should also make sure to pay the night of…as there are many who get girls to babysit and 3 weeks later they still owe them money!!! as far as thinking $10 is too much,well as the saying goes no money no honey,babysitting is an accessory NOT a necessity!!

• sam

  yes ur being a cheap crown heights farmer who probably drives a leased 2011 car.

• Goat

  “Am I being unreasonable here?”

  You bet! You get a service you pay the fee. Why should Lubavitch teenagers have to work for free?

• parents

  I have one child who is sleeping, the girl gets food TV Internet and quiet to study and they demand between $10 & $12 a hour
  That is more then most workers in the US who get paid on the books for hard labor

• Dina

  If you want to go out socially, you have to pay for child care. The end. This is the safety of your children…don’t be cheap.

• montrealer

  let me tell you that they are overpaid !! I can’t find a babysitter for less then 15 $ an hour.
  watching just one baby sleep.

• pay

  as a relativley new parent, with not such a big income, i think i understand where you are coming from. and bottom line is if someone does a service for you, you gota pay the going rate. we have no right in the world to ask make them do us a favor. unless it is so presented in the first place. this is their “profesion” at the moment and are entitled to be paid. if it is too hard for you, then take your kids with you, or let the wife go first and then the husband, or move out of crown heigts to a place where the cost of living is cheaper and you won’t “have” to go to so many simchos.
  and you have no clue what that girl needs the money for, she may even be collecting to be able to pay for summer camp that her parents can’t afford… vda”l

• 8 or 10

  I pay 10 an hour. My kids are asleep. I always leave food and nosh, they have access to my computer ect. I do think that it is a bit much. I think 8 dollars is fair.

• Wages

  No, there is nothing wrong with charging $10/hr.

  If you can’t afford it, then you and your husband should take turns going to the Simcha, rather than going at the same time, so that one of you can babysit.

  Another point: when you go to a Simcha, especially one of not a close relative, you really don’t need to spend more than 1 hour there.

  You are forgetting that these girls are given large homework assignments, and they are most likely losing out on precious time when they babysit.

  So yes, it’s worth $10/hr.

• real world skills

  Babysitters can charge whichever rate they would like to make. HOWEVER, how they present their rate is an expression of their derech eretz or lack there of. Just as when an adult interviews for job, compensation is the last topic to be discussed, a babysitter with class will have the same approach. In addition, a babysitter with responsibility and people skills will be able to handle the employer saying “and by the way, no phone or computers when you are with my kids, that’s my preference.”

• Realistically speakin

  First,comments such as #6 are probably from an unmarried high school girl (and if its true dont pretend your not)Anyways, when someone comes to me to babysit (and do not go on a rant about the next few words, I get girls who I know are 100 fine with it) they have tv, internet, FOOD, ect. I pay around 12 an hour for a sleeping kid. I do not expect favors, It is a job, but seriously though, 12? Makes more then me, and I work with 18 up, active kids. I think $8.50-9.00 should be the going rate

• fp

  I think we all need a break to enjoy and go out at night 10.00 is a bit high but all people should be paid for there time regardless if she just sits in your house.You are paying her for her time and she is there so nothing happens to your sleeping children you could hardly go out and leave them alone.We all find money for the things we want in life we should be asking ourselves how can i leave my children with someone all day while i go to work or shopping who is not Jewish even if she is kind and trustworthy what is this person who in the first 5 years of a child’s life most influences that child’s development what message does this one send?To all the parents who want to save money save your children and don’t leave them with a non Jew as for the girls they must be paid im sure there are some that don’t charge so much but they also need to be paid they are providing you a service if it was your daughter who uses the money for things to help her struggling family provide there needs so lighten up and think before you write.

• awake vs asleep

  I think that if the kids are up, and they need to do supper, bedtime ect, then 10+ is normal. If kids are already sleeping 7-9 is normal

• Mimabat Sheni...

  I have been babysitting since I was thirteen. My parents are shluchim and I buy my own clothes and I paid for seminary. So I think when look after your children in your fancy house as you pull out of your double driveway in your rolls royce, it would be only menchlech to give me a reasonable amount of me. Yes, more than 15 dollars an hour.

• Scrooge

  To the anonymous writer du jour:

  You are not just new to the world of parenting, it seems you are also new to the world of business and concepts such as supply and demand.

  You can offer a girl any amount of money you want, but why should she take your $3/hour when someone else will give her $10/hour? No one needs to do you any favors because you want to go somewhere.

  Babysitting is not a mitzvah, and you should not expect anyone to treat it that way. They are providing a service just like anyone else you hire to help around the house. Are you paying your cleaning lady to much to clean up after your angels?

  And yes, I am a parent who pays a babysitter when I want to go somewhere.

• Parent

  It’s really sad to read how little some folks value their children. To compare the babysitter’s salary to the cleaning lady’s? Really? Is your floor more important than your children????

  Unfortunately girls MUST state their going rate in fear of being payed severely lower than average. If they don’t make it up before they get taken advantage of. There are also plenty of people who “owe” the babysitters who is horrific. Again, is this how you value your children? And why should she ever come back? This is by some homes are black listed ad they can’t get anyone.

  People talk, trust me.

  A good babysitter who is respectful of your home, and caring toward your children is a precious commodity. Stop complaining and realize that your gems deserve the best.

• Pick your battles

  If you cant afford the fancy car you dont buy it!
  If you cant afford the babysitter dont go out!

• CH Resident

  Number 35:

  So therefore when you make a lemonade stand, $4 a cup is reasonable because you pay your own expenses? Get real. I do feel bad for you as I understand that your parents are struggling as shluchim and you pitch in to buy things most girs take for granted… But please stop your feeling of entitlement to more than the normative rates. And I think the author was addressing those babysitting struggling families, not Bill Gates’s Children if you are fortunate enough to get that gig.

  I think the more important question is what we should give the girls as they babysit. Should we give them internet access? Should we not? I think some leadership from the community heads on this is long overdue. I tremble when I see my wife telling them the computer codes lest their neshomo get negatively impacted and it would be partly if not fully ourselves to blame.

• Babysitting is not mandetory

  When a babysitter does not state a rate then they are taken advantage of and given $5 to $6.

  To the idiot who compared rates to the 90’s, $5 back then bought you $10 today.

• chaim

  I think the price of gas is high but I am not writing an op ed about it.

• all crown heights mommys.

  baby sitters r a Luxury.if u cant afford it,then dont get 1.

• Seriously?

  Unreasonable. Actually, 10 an hour is considered cheap to most people.In other communtities it can go up to 20 an hour. Really, charging 10 an hour is a chessed. And there is no guarantee your child won’t wake up and give the babysitter a run for their money. Also, if your babysitter is their teens, this is probably just a way for them to have a little spending money. They don’t have regular jobs.I don’t think anyone should be complaining about them making more than you do at your job, because trust me, they dont. Unless they are babysitting 8 hours a day which i doubt they are. So if you want a babysitter, shell out the 30-40 dollars. Babysitting is a luxury, not something that’s thrown into the baby package for an extra $3 an hour.

• Pop

  My wife and I have trained my daughter to accept what she is offered. In a couple of cases where I knew the family that she is baby sitting for is struggling financially, she has refused payment. Or if she is babysitting for a pregnant woman going to the hospital etc.. she does not take payment. However, when my kids were younger and we could not afford a babysitter, we would alternate going to simchas unless it was a close friend or relative. It is quite different now a days. Many young couples go out to dinner or other outings which are more or less discretionary. If they can afford to go out to a fancy dinner, than the can pay my daughter $10 and hour. If you want someone responsible to watch your kids, you have to be ready to pay.

• HAHAHA

  i wish i was overpaid! babyistting is my full time job and 10 and hr is not enough. it all depends on the nature of the job.

• logic

  Why should a girl who goes to school and works hard studying give up her few preicious hours for free.

  Maybe call up jet blue and ask for a free flight to california and when they decline say YOU ARE GOING THERE ANYWAY. Thats the logic you are going with.

  Some of these GIRLS come from houses that dont have money and this little money keeps them going.

  What diferance does it make if the kids are awake or asleep. If something were tohappen she would be held responsible.

  Plain and simple STOP COUNTING OTHER PEOPLES MONEY!

• to 12 and 6

  to #6

  i didnt even get past # 12 and i am so sick of some of these comments people wrote. for some odd reason i get the feeling that the babysitter you wrote about was actually the girl who wrote comment #12.

  the only thing that makes me think differently is that i don’t think she would have quoted you 14, 14 + supper + overtime might have been more like it.

• to Pop

  I will say a tefilla that Hashem should generously pay your daughter for the chessed she does for those financially struggling. I’m not best buddies with Hashem but take my tefillas hedyot for what it’s worth.

• cheap

  They are worth whatever you are willing to pay, if you wish not to pay do not go out.
  They are helping you marrige so you can go have a fun night out dont complain

• its life

  i cant agree anymore! My wife and I give the babysitter our labtop with internet and our food and our child is asleep and i need to pay you 10 an hour! My favorite is when they ask if a friend or two could come over to study(i am happy to have them over) but then i am paying you to study with your friends!!! I do think we must pay the girls and show our appreciation to them, but in return i feel they should give us respect and appreciation for my internet/wifi and food and a quiet place to study!

• To #12

  You said it the best.

• parent

  Like others have pointed out, babysitting is sometimes the worlds easiest job. If the children are asleep, than to sit online for four hours surfing, facebooking etc. CANNOT be compared to a real job like tutoring which is an engaging service. If babysitters want to be paid real wages, take the difficult homes, otherwise, anything above $5 is generous pay to facebook. I understand that many girls don’t only get the easiest of homes, I’m addressing those who do.

• Very Unreasonable

  As a mother of 6 ka“h, I take a lot of issue with this op-ed. Financially, we would fall in to the ”we BH pay our bills with little to nothing left over“ category. Despite that, I am happy to pay the going rate ($10/hour) even though 98% of the time we leave the babysitter with sleeping children.

  I BH come from a very large family, with lots of simchos. When I can’t afford to pay a babysitter, I either take turns with my husband or I don’t go! Would I rather go with my husband? Yes! I would also rather have money to spare, but I don’t and I make it work BH.

  Get one thing straight: No one owes you anything! This attitude of ”hakol magiya li” is wrong; not the girls that want to be paid for having their evenings tied up.

• personal finance

  I do think you’re overreacting. But in the big picture, you are discussing saving up to $15 a time, if you could cut the price by 50% for 3 hours. I’d suggest looking into saving money in areas like rent, cars, and maybe groceries. Even if it means moving out of Brooklyn.

• Op-ed author

  I understand how the free market works. I personally subscribe to the Austrian school of economics (AKA Laissez-faire economics, AKA Adam Smith Economics AKA free market economics…). My point was to suggest whether parents and schools still feel it necessary to genuinely instill a sense of altruism to an age of girls who generally don’t need to earn a living at that age, to their own community. When the bochurim donate blood at Ahavas Chessed, they can say we want $40 a pint as hospitals pay $200 per pint but they don’t do that. When we are talking about one’s own community, is priority on altruism or earning a living? Of course those families making comfortable livings ought to pay for a service, but what about families that forking over $40-$50 to attend a cousin’s wedding? There is zero problem with the babysitters making such demands from an ethical standpoint, and I detest freeloaders as much as anybody else who want something for nothing. That’s why I addressed the families of those really down on their luck who would give appreciation money as opposed to an hourly “wage”. And those families that pay $20 an hour tend to be in the wealthier communities where salaries quadruple in median income that of the median income in CH though the family size in CH quadruple those in the upscale communities.

• Liat

  Considering I babysit 7 kids every afternoon/evening (homework, supper, baths, listening about their day, taking them shopping etc.), and I only get paid $10/hr, either I am incredibly underpaid or these girls watching a sleeping baby are incredibly overpaid. Actually, I think it’s a combination. I should probably be getting closer to $20/hr, and they should be getting more like $6-7.

  and to poster 35 – I see you’ve picked up that ‘i’m entitled to everything because I’m on shlichus mentality. Drop it. It’s very unbecoming.

• they work you pay

  These same girls do chesed as well – they go weekly -to help families that need a little extra help after school. they do this happily and they never miss their chesed days. there are various programs set up through school and bikur cholim. However if you call them to work for you then pay them

• omg seriously?

  hello stop whining if u dont want to pay for a babysitter then dont go out
  simple as that
  if u want to go out and spend time together then dont complain if i want to charge u $10 an hour
  thats not even alot
  wait until ur kids r older so they can babysit until u go out together if u dont want to pay

• A babysitter

  I babysit all the time. I have specific families that ask me, consistent jobs, I babysit for my aunts, and I know that the price depends on who’s asking. If I’m babysitting for someone that I know is barely managing with basic needs, I will make sure that she does no pay me, even if I babysat for five hours when I could have used my time for other things I needed to do. I would not take a penny from an aunt or cousin, because I don’t feel like I’m sacrificing anything for a relative. And when someone asks me “how much an hour?” I say whatever you want. I usually get 7-8 dollars an hour, but not because that’s what I demanded. I take it cause that’s what they can afford to give me. It doesn’t matter if I’m taking care of an awake newborn or sitting on the computer with sleeping kids. It’s still my time and sometimes my energy, and unless I’m doing chesed for someone that can’t afford it, I do expect to get decent pay. If someone

• From a MOther who rarely goes out

  You can’t compare donating blood to babysitting. Donating blood requires a few minutes of your time, and then your body makes more blood, with little to no effort from you. These girls don’t NEED to make a living? You don’t HAVE to go out. If you don’t want to pay a babysitter, don’t go out! It is no one’s JOB to watch your kids. Would it be nice if a girl did it for free once in while? Of course! But it so wrong of you to suggest that girls should be taught to do this. Helping out in one’s own family is a responsibility. Babysitting others kids for free is not.

• Seriously...

  So why don’t you quit your job and become a babysitter instead, if they make so much money?

  To all you “They make more an hr than I do..”
  Yes, that may be true, but your babysitter is only there for, what, three hours? And how many hours do you work a day? If someone works for you for just an hour, you wouldn’t have as big of a problem forking over a 10, would you? ‘Cuz it’s not really adding up. The more hours you’re getting paid for, the harder it is for the employer to give a higher pay, as it adds up.
  So yes, maybe your babysitter is demanding more than you make an hour. And true she isn’t paying bills and sending kids to school. But she doesn’t work as many hours a day as you do. And not necessarily does she get a babysitting job every evening. So now compare her paid hours to yours. She works maybe… 7 hours a week? Assuming she babysits for 2 or 3 nights… So yes her expenses may be less than yours but she gets paid for 7 hours a week while your get paid for … 40 hours? More?

• Try to take the high road

  The reality is that some people can afford to pay more and some can’t. When my children were young, I couldn’t afford babysitters and we rarely went out. Not even once a year for our anniversary or birthdays.

  But I find some people’s comments appalling. Not everyone leases a car; not everyone even OWNs a car. I only go to simchas chossen v’kallah so I won’t be obliged to give a gift. Yes, there are many wealthy people who are cheap and poor people who are generous. Let’s remember to TRY to judge favorably (or better yet, not judge at all).

  I think that couples should be able to go out and be able to find a good, responsible babysitter without going broke. But I realize that a “pay what you want” system will never work because we have too many people who “use the system” and anything or anyone without a second thought.

  Personally, I feel that $10 an hour in cash is way too much for sleeping children. That translates to about $14. an hour for an ‘on the books’ type of job.

  The only thing we can hope for is a change in attitude by those who babysit feeling entitled to high pay and those who can afford it learning not to resent them.

• ME!

  i dont charge more then $10, but its not right when u have ppl you babysitting for and they just say we will pay u and never do. bc i understand not ever one has money so i say anywhere between 8-10 and believe or not we check on the kids very often just bc when u get in u see us on the computer we check on the kids a couple of times…
  and if u don’t have money for a babysitter then don’t go out to eat…. we come home late and we need to be up by 730 am to be on time to school… and most of times we are not bc we were babysitting late for U GUYS!!!
  so just have that in mind. and most other commuintes there babysitters get payed anywhere between 15-20 an hour.

• babysitter

  I babysat a while back for a few hours…kids were up…I played with them…fed themm…the Mom gave me 5 dollars. I didn’t say anything but I definitely felt like she took advantage of me.

• Internet?

  Why is it ok tl leave the babysitter access to the Internet?

• Money

  If people think the babysitter gets paid more than them maybe they should get a babysitting job!

• to 59. A babysitter

  You are a mentsch!

  I want to point out that often it is difficult to decipher who’s struggling and who not. A leased non luxury car (say a civic or accord) may be just to have a reliable car to get to work without spending days at mechanics and thousands on maintenance because it is difficult to earn a half doable living when your mechanic is your home away from home… I even know of a fellow in a 7 figure home which bought it when business is good and now he struggles to cover his basic food/energy/medical bills. Doesn’t mean you have to treat them as charity cases with pity… but not necessarily are the “rich looking people” the cash cows you think they are. Many were idiots to take for granted a period of prosperity and foolishly assumed (and over leveraged) that the prosperity would last forever and now… I truly pity those people.

• What are you paying for?

  The question is what are you paying your babysitters for? If you look at it that you’re paying them to sit around doing nothing while you’re children sleep then yes, $10 seems like a huge amount. But in truth you are paying them for their time. I get the occasional babysitting job from the people in my community (oh and by the way, I’m a guy). I’ve been paid everywhere from $5 an hour to $12 an hour. I don’t generally ask for the payment, and if they want to take a couple days to pay me then that’s ok. That’s just who I am. But the truth of the matter is that They are paying me to take my personal time to stay in the house to make sure their kids are safe. Is $10 really too much to ensure your childrens safety while you and your spouse go out to enjoy time together or whatever it is you may be doing?

• Andrea Schonberger

  When I was a teen in the 1970’s I charged $1.00 an hour even if I had to do something extra like cook a meal. My husband was a career soldier in the US army and when we were stationed in Korea I babysat for free as I knew money was tight with those couples. I guess it depends on the situation on what type of compensation you should get.

• babysit

  I understand your point; paying a babysitter $10 an hour for sitting on your couch isn’t right.

  But i used to babysit for someone who treats her babysitters in a disgusting fashion. It starts with “babysitters do nothing, but sit on my couch, while my kids are asleep, so I’ll only pay you $8” It was a harsh statement, but I get it, so I agreed to $8.

  But she’d come home and watch me as I sit on my laptop doing homework, making comments such as “the sophisticated teenagers of today…is that why we babysitters pay you? do go buy laptops?”…

  her comments were more disgusting with each babysitting job, so I stopped going, and I tell my sisters and friends not to go either. It’s ok to pay less, but to talk to young girls in such a humiliating manner is not ok at all.

  Mothers: we get it! but don’t expect us to be ok with getting paid less if we’re mistreated.You want others to respect you, you got to respect others as well-even if they’re 20+ years your junior

• Remember when you were 15?

  Babysitting through high school was the only way i could afford to participate in high school activities. Shabbaton, production, clothes… It’s an expensive world out there, even for a teen.

• The truth of the matter

  It happens to be that the girls that tend to babysit tend to be the girls that need the money ie out of town girls that need to buy their own shampoo and don’t want to call their parents for money every day. Or the girls that need to buy their own clothes because their parents can’t afford it.Babysitting is not a hobby, its a job. You only do it if you need the money. Look at the girls you hire as babysitters I doubt they come from millionaire families.. So if you would like to go out with your husband pay the price! Just like a cleaning lady its not a necessity its a luxury. You can’t afford it, so don’t hire!

• Leah

  I find comments like #3 to be really upsetting. There is no need to put down anyone and call them names – and if you are going to do it, at least get your spelling correct (you’re instead of your). $10 an hour for someone without training is amazing. There’s plenty of people out there who are making $10-13/hour and they have typing training or restaurant courses. I’ve never heard of high school babysitters making $20. Please share with me where, so I can move there, abandon my high stress job, and get more money than I’m earning now ($25/hour after taxes comes out to less than $20 in cash) – and I can be watching my child while babysitting another one. And regarding cab fair, what happened to the days when a babysitter’s parents would pick her up, or the mom or dad of the kids she was watching dropped her off home?

• to #55

  I don’t know what you do for a living, but perhaps you should do it for free in the name of altruism.

  I can hear you thinking, “Work for for free? That’s absurd!”

  Exactly! Our girls have no moral obligation to provide a service free of charge because you want to go to a wedding or to Le Merais.

  “This person wants something and doesn’t want to pay, so please go do it for free” is not the type of “altruistic” values I hope to teach my children. That’s just teaching them to let people take advantage of them,

• Esty

  I am a Teenager and i charge $5 dollers an hour,I just babysat for 6 kid, with 3 friends, 9 kids altogether for 12 houres and I got $60 dollers
  i think that was a very fare price, With big familys I charge $5 or small (1-3) I charge $6 I think it is really silly to be paying $10 dollers an houre.
  I have been babysitting for 4 years and my price has only gone up a doller.
  I sometimes say “dont worry about paying it was fun”, but I am always afread to say that in fear thta the next time they ask me to babysit they are expecting a free babysitter, Note to parents, If a babysitter says no thank you to money, please do not expect the girls to babysit for free just b/c they did it once to be nice.

• To #65

  The same reason it’s ok for you to use the Internet. Seriously, so many people in this community are pathtic.

• Tzippy

  if there is a girl reading this, and ready to babysit for $8 an hour please put your number as a comment
  even better, i am sure that there still must be some girl in ch who will babysit for less so, please lets create a gmach who will hold a list of girl with good reference and for a better price

• WORRIED MOM AND NANNY

  I am amazed at the waste of time and space to this topic just make sure you know who is watching your children i see to much out there with all the non Jews watching our children live in also you might save money and have a clean house but your children are being abused i am not extreme in my saying this for that is what this is abuse i see it in the park and on the street don’t wait till your the next story on this web site. ALL THIS IS TO SAVE MONEY NOT TO HIRE A JEW

• ShanA

  When I babysat in the 90’s I got paid $4 an hour. I was from out of town and every penny I earned went to buying dinners and basic necessities. I babysat about 8 hours a week.

  Today as a mother of three I pay $12 an hour.(I don’t live in ch). I encourage the girls to tell me how much they want and not to be embarrassed. I don’t want to do the wrong thing by someone who is taking care of my kids. Besides babysitting is the first step in making our girls assertive in a real work environment. I actually tell them they shouldn’t be shy because they need to learn to assert themselves.

  Better that you pay a little extra to the babysitter and then not higher them again, then for someone to walk around broiges that you didn’t pay them enough.

• Ahavas Chessed Volunteer now abroad

  “When the bochurim donate blood at Ahavas Chessed”

  They get $10 in vouchers for a local restaurant and a free lunch before they donate.

  Hate to be cynical, but the truth is the truth – most of them do it only for that reason. Some of them are freeloaders who used to show me welfare cards as ID when I volunteered at the AC blood drives.

  I refuse to accept/use the voucher or any gift other than something to eat before/afterward when I give whole blood, but I fully understand those who do donate for the voucher and their blood is just as red as mine.

  There’s no such thing as a free lunch, but there are far too many “frum” Jews who expect one both from the community and from outside. (Far too many Americans in general expect the same, and that’s why I’m abroad and you have Obama.)

• to 80

  You are cynical. When I lived in NY I also donated via Ahavas Chessed and graciously accepted the vouchers. Now that I live out of state, I donate at the local hospital which the only thing free is a cup of juice before/after donation and validation of the parking during donation. Blood donors are freeloaders? I’m speechless.

• A high school girl

  I’m a high school girl who babysits occasionally. I’d like to say a few things. First of all, when you got $6 an hour all those years back, it’s almost equivalent to $10 an hour now. Secondly, us girls have a lot better things to do than sitting in your house and watching your kinds no difference if they’re sleeping or running around. I can’t even believe some of you mothers are saying that babysitters shouldn’t always demand money. We babysit I have a few extra dollars in our pockets, we don’t enjoy watching someone else’s kids. If your looking to get a free babysitter, don’t hire a girl. Hire= getting payed. I’m shocked beyond words from this article. If someone really can’t afford to pay $10 an hour, then tell the girl BEFORE she comes how much your planning on paying her per hour.
  And remember- girls aren’t slaves!!

• High school babysitter

  As a babysitter whenever they ask me how much I charge I always say whatever u want unless it’s someone I know who can’t afford it I always say don’t worry I didn’t do anything so u don’t have to pay me bc I don’t have Internet at home and when I go babysitting I can finnaly use the Internet and study in a quiet place!!! When I say to poeple give me whatever u want they usually give me $10 but I’m happy with whatever they give me. I always think ahead to when I’m a mother and need to go out and Chas vsholom I can’t afford the going rate I would not want that to happen to me!!!

• Pay Up or Stay Home

  If you can’t afford a babysitter, then stay home with your kids. Hashem will provide.

• babysitter

  i used to babyssit quie often and yes it is tiring- youa s the parents should know- you are with the kids all day. I had to “name” my price and i sid say “i usually get $10 an hour” because if i didnt, they would see a sweet girl who would say yes to anything, and I’d get paid $40 for an entire day of babysitting and come home thoroughly exausted

  And someone esle satted correctly, that this is the job these girls have now and many of them have expenses they have to pay.

• agree with 39

  I agree with #39 that it’s long overdue that one of the educators or rabbonim ought to make guidelines for what parents should do when they hire a babysitter whether they should grant the babysitter internet access or not. A mature girl over 20 I guess I would trust but what about high school age? I always let them just because I don’t want to be seen as mean. But am I placing them at risk of harming themselves? I’d rather not think of it. So can a CH Rov or Senior educator step up to the plate and write guidelines on this and post it to the Chabad news sites? Pretty please!

• CH resident

  A babysitter provides a service. If you can not afford this service do not hire for it. Girls would rather hang out with other girls or go out or do other things besides sitting in your house and watching your kids. Please, no one owes you anything. The girls work for the money. I know girls who save up for class trips, yom tov cloths, camp or just spending money in seminary. Why do you feel that anyone owes you? Maybe think of the girls. You say everyone is entitled to a “date night”. NO they are not. Not if you can not afford it. Stop this me, me me. If your job is answering the phone and it does not ring for an hour, do you say to your boss “do not pay me for this hour” as I just sat and read a book? Stop kvetchin. Grow up! You can’t afford it no one owes you anything. Please get this into your head. Enough of this whining and selfishness.

• seriously!

  im a 12th grader in crown heights and i babysit, and yes i agree that if its a few hours and a sleeping baby $8 is fine! but if your kids are up then u should totally be paying $10an hr or more. i also beleive that you should be paying per kid, that is if you are leaving 5,6 or 7 little kids you should be paying more than if its one or 2 little kids! yes, many girls today rely on this money to buy things they need or to save up for seminary ect this is their job remember? and if you cant afford it, there are many girls who do chessed hours and will babysit for free, but that is not called hiring a babysitter, its a wonderful girl doing you a big favor! appreciate it either way. girls who take of their time to come babysit should be paid, and well!

• babysitter

  im in high skool and i babysit. whenever i dont charge bc i do it 4 chessed the people barely say thank u. getting paid is 2 me almost like a thank u 4 the work bc of bathing supper putting 2 sleep etc. i charge under $10 and if a kid is sleeping i charge less but i want 2 not be so dependent on my parents 4 pocket money so thats y i generally charge i dont kno if thats y we all charge but like u we want money 2 buy ourselves nice things.

• I WILL BABYSIT FOR LESS THAN $10

  I’m an 11th grader in Flatbush who has been babysitting for a few years already. When I started babysitting I got $5 an hour. Now I sometimes get $6, but usually $7 an hour. I don’t mind if you pay me $8 or more (if you can afford it). I think it is ridiculous to get $10 an hour, you get less jobs if you charge so much. I actually enjoy when the kids are up as long as it’s not late at night or if I don’t have too much homework to do. If you need a babysitter you can call me at ….

• get a job you lready get food stamps

  get a job and pay your baby sitter why is it our fault that you dont earn enough money! i work 2 jobs and my wife works 1 halfday and wew still dont have the most amazing income but when we go out we pay min$10 -$14 a hr

• mother in crown heights

  Uh….You leave a teenage girl with free rein to the COMPUTER….?????!!!!!

• IMHO

  The world doesn’t “owe you” just because you have kids. Having a family is a privilege and comes with responsibility; financially and otherwise. You are not entitled to free or under priced child care just because you followed social norms and had children. If you are truly strapped for cash you can always ask for chesed help through the schools. My husband and I go out only about three times a year due to our tight budget, and I pay my infrequent babysitters commensurate to there experience. Usually between 10 and 15 and hour and my kids are sleeping. I would not consider offering under the going rate as these are my children and those extra few dollars are worth having a happy sitter who feels appreciated and is not going to skimp on her duties.

• to 81

  A certain group did indeed donate blood just for the vouchers. I could not blame them, but I also know that had there been no vouchers, most of the crowd from that group, which is known for a certain type of behavior and associated with a certain flag, would not have donated on their own. When I saw some of these characters with EBT cards, I was amazed.

  The donors from Anash and local young people were another story altogether. Most donors fall into that category.

• think carpool

  you might want to set up a “carpool”-style arrangement with a friend – “I’ll babysit tonight for your kids (while my husband is home with our kids), and you do the same for me next week”

• alternatively

  you could advertize that you are willing to provide xxx amount of tutoring in exchange of xxx amount of babysitting. could be a win-win for many reasons

• montrealer

  i babysit for a few families i know and i get around 8-9 $ an hour. it doesnt matter if the kids are awake or not.

• High School Girl

  I for one feel that babysitters are DEFINITELY overpaid.
  To get $10-$12 an hour only on the conditions that the kids are sleeping, there is full internet access, no housework involved etc. is not normal.

  I alone feel bad taking money from parents, especially if the kids are asleep. Also considering that i have married siblings and they sometimes would like a simple night out with each other, but it’ll cost them to pay a babysitter, just as much as their evening. They are lucky enough to have a sibling who would be able to watch the kids for them for free, these other parents who want to go simply to a family simcha have to pay an arm and a leg for a little high school girl to watch their already sleeping kids.

  I know that not too long ago, maybe even 10 years ago, a babysitter would change diapers, play with kids, put them into pajamas, put them into bed, clean the house, laundry, etc. all for $5 an hour.

  That makes more sense, especially considering that it’s going to A FIFTEEN YEAR OLD who in reality DOES NOT need an income the same as that of a working mother.

  Now, the dollar is worth differently and a teenagers time is “considered” more precious than earlier days, but i still feel that to babysit sleeping kids should cost no more than $5 an hour – what effort is the high school girl putting in already? That she has a quiet place to study???

• just me

  10 an hour seems okay. I would not mind charging twelve, but I realize then that people may not hire me. 3 or more kids though, and if becomes 13. If you don’t like it, don’t hire me. (Don’t make rules, and you WILL get walked over) Oh, and btw, about the 3 dollars you’d charge 30 years ago- factor in inflation, so it’s all relative-duh!

• A teenager with a word about babysitting

  I babysit all the time. Here are my rules:
  If the family I am babysitting for is struggling for basic needs, I will absolutely refuse pay if they want to run to a close friend’s simcha or something. They can go to a simcha once in a new moon without having to forgo an essential need. That’s a chesed that is needed; your luxury of a date with your husband is NOT my chesed project.
  If I am babystting for my aunt or cousin or some other close relative, I refuse to accept pay because after all, I’m just doing a favor and anyways it’s a give and take life.
  At anyone who I’m babysitting for as a service, when I’m asked “how much an hour?” I say I’m not specific. I only babysit for good people and I know that they will give me how much my time is worth. From the most common homes I babysit at, I take $7 an hour. I pay for most extras that I want to buy, and this is where it comes from. At one home I take care of a couple month old baby,and in the other one I usually put kids to bed and watch them at night. I always get tipped, and if the parents come home really late and feel bad they’ll raise it to 10 an hour for that time, and also 10 an hour if I’m watching the kids during the day.
  I would never quote a price to a shliach. And I never before thought that seven bucks an hour might be too little, but now seeing 14 dollars an hour, who knows…those girls should get a real job if they want so much money.
  What I suggest to parents afraid of high price is either: If six dollars is going to be your limit, either don’t go out or take your kids with you. Or maybe stop being so frightened about giving away a few dollars in return for your child’s care and safety. I you love your children, get them a babysitter that you will pay because you love your kids.
  Or: If you are a parent that can afford to pay your babysitter a normal price, but you don’t want to faint when she announces her price, be certain that BEFORE you hire her, her price is within your price range, and that she is actually going to check on the kids every ten minutes even if they are soundly sleeping in the back room.
  Don’t expect your babysitter to clean up after your kids’ mess: they are plenty of illegals in this city waiting to be hired for cleaning. I love children; I absolutely despise cleaning. If you want me to clean while watching your kids at night, don’t be surprised when I quote you a cleaning lady’s price + a babysitter’s price- per every hour. Babysitters are usually teenage girls like me who’s job is taking care of your kids and not cleaning up your messes. When I’m playing with them, we’ll clean up together just because that’s what we do with children when they finish playing.
  And about internet, you, the ones hiring us, are not our parents. These days, I can’t do my homework or study for a test without it- everything is stored on Google docs, my email, or a notes website.
  I consider myself to be a good babysitter with fine pay, doing chesed for the people who need it, and not the spoiled new parents who want to go on a luxury outing with a free babysitter. Life only accepts pay for work,and not free service for spoiled brats.
  For all you babysitters out there who are taking more than 10 an hour for sitting with a computer, it IS outrageous unless you’re babysitting till 2 a.m., and you may just find that babysitting calls are disappearing on you, and soon enough you’ll be out of business. Go sit at hard paperwork for $14 an hour and then give all that over to your babysitter.

• this is nuts

  this is madness these girls dont have to babysit for you they are doing you a favor especially high school girls they have a high volume of tests a week and they have to go to sleep at reasonable time i repeat: THEY ARE DOING YOU A FAVOR take it or leave it i know a lot of families are struggling but a lot of these girls dont get allowances so they work to go out with theyre friends and have a good time i really do feel bad that this is what ch has come to whining whiners if you dont want to pay then get a relative to do you a favor a sister cousin whatever i think that what you people are asking is insensitive and please dont complain they are doing you a favor always remember that and be grateful

• to #77 Tzippy

  maybe you should post your number and someone will call you. i’m not sure how many girls are willing to post their private number on the web

• Pay up or Stay in.

  If you don’t want to pay for a babysitter than don’t go out. Wait till you have to pay school fees then babysitting seems like a breeze. Children cost money – face facts.

• they should get paid...but i agree

  10$ is so high- and we only go out when we absolutely must! no- not just for fun!and the kids are always sleeping..it would be nice to get a lower rate…

• Adam Smith

  As for paying babysitters when your children are asleep – do you refuse to pay your home and car insurance because you have no claims? Try that and see what happens.

  A babysitter for sleeping children is an insurance policy for your most precious possessions – and if you think you don’t have to pay for that, you should not have children.

• Wrong Perspective

  You are paying because, in case of any sort of problem, there is a capable person in your home to deal with the situation. If the sitter is not capable then you should not be hiring him/her in the first place. If they are as capable as your children then let your kids watch themselves.

  Hire someone you find capable and pay them accordingly. If you don’t think they are capable/deserving of the salary then you may as well leave your children alone because you obviously don’t really care about the safety of your children

• Inflation

  All expenses has gone up. When a sitter got paid 5 dollars/hour, the cost of a slice of pizza was not more then 1.50.
  If everything has gone up, including salary, why should the sitter not go up?

• totally don-t mind getting $8 an hour

  i would totally not mind babysitting for $8 an hour. i usually get 10 an hour cuz i live in a rich sefardic neighbrohood. i dont mind getting 8 an hour. i dont think badly of the ashkanazim who pay 8 an hour. i live in flatbush though so i dont think it would work for those in crown heights

• francine

  i’m a mom who has 3 children that are age apropiate for babysitting.ages 17, 16, and 14. i usually DO NOT LET them babysitt for i know that these mothers take advantage of their babysitters. my oldest daughter babysatt once and came home and asked “ma, are all mothers so nasty and cheap?” when i asked her why she answered that she got $4 an hr wich means she got $20 for 5 hours and the mom didnt even say thank you OR walk her to the door. ever since that she has never babysatt again. but i dont let my other daughters babysitt bec #1 they dont need the money when they need or want money i give them the money and #2 i encourage them to hang out with frinds. in my opinion i think socializing is more important then making money.they are children, its child labor. they only babysitt for my friends who call once i a while and want someone they know and their kids know so that they wont go crazy the second they leave.