109 Comments

• I have ADHD

  I agree with you 100 percent. See what I did was suck up to the guy who was in charge of shlichus, thats what you should have done.. I didnt even need to learn a word.

  and yes in my group of guys on shlichus, I was the most active so yes.. Us ADD & ADHD guys have a lot to offer.

  Dont loose hope, someone will definitely want you and they definitly will be lucky to have such a good writer lol.

• i got shlichus - but;

  gr8 article. hit the point rite on. although hanhalas do see effort u put in sometimes. thanx for voicing alot of bochurims fears. remember just cos u didnt get shlichus it doesnt mean ur a failure, the hanhaloa is – as u rightfully said. good luck, and keep up the spirit…..

• Anonymous

  I love it, “Sent from my friends iPhone who is getting Shlichus”

  Your not supposed to have cell phones in Yeshiva that go online…

• mendy

  Oheli torah is corrupted

• mendy is right

  Agree with #4

• 19 year old 4 2 long.

  Vary nice. But forgot to mention the guys who did not get shlichus because they did not turn 20.

  i’m not getting shlichus because i did not turn 20 b4 Rosh Chodes Elul.

  Dont forget about me.

• Please Clarify

  I don’t understand. I was never in OT, and while I have heard of the “point system”, I do not know all details involved. Can you please give a brief description. If you came to chasidus every morning and you learned chasidus and niglah, why don’t you have enough points?

• Rabbi Dovid Yossi Goodman

  I would bring you out but I have girls in the house.

  Keep fighting, there are many shluchim who will want you. A guy like you would take such a effort to wright this and to try to do things on your own is a guy who would make a good shliach.

  I wish you much Hatzloch.

• Pish in neval

  Ari is that you?

  Zalman! lol i like that

• Chaim

  to # 6
  You can get shlichus next year.

• C805

  Why dont you take advantage?
  Leave the crapy system.
  I did, you can.

  Go to collage, get a degree & get a life.

  Shlichus is gr8 but it dont give you much for the real world.

• Shlichus ?

  Who`s shlichus is this anyway? The Rebbe only sent Bochurim Shluchim to Melbourne in the years of 1967 to 1975,

• shliach

  Find out where your chaverim are going to, contact the yeshiva and ask them if you can come along too! even if you arent an official shliach..

• 19 year old 4 2 long

  To #10:

  I spent 6 years of yeshivah with my best friends and you want me to split away from them because I missed a deadline?
  Let me clarify, i missed the deadline by 25 days!
  My parents chose to send me to school & did not take this in to account. the damage is done…

  4 your info I am burned out as well. dono what im doing yet for next year but i defenetly am NOT going to a Yeshivah.

• Take meds

  Take ritalin.

  lol

• to C805

  It sounds like you learn`t alot in College. Spelling, grammar etc.

• gluck

  if shlichus is where you see yourself in life, then you need to pursue it, but like #11 said there’s nothing wrong with going to college, getting a degree and doing something else. You need to stay true to yourself and everything will iy”h fall into place

• Zalman C

  To #3: Welcome to the real world.

  To #4 & 7: Please do not attack yeshivas by name. (I am not necessarily in OT)

  To #6: Good point, my bad. some people have A.D.D. & some are born late.

  To #8: I love you.

  To #11: Wow. You prob just read the first line and made your comment. you are exactly what I dont want to become. Thanx for helping the community understand what i’m talking about.

  To #13: I have. most of these places fill up to what they can afford ($) so that is a route but a vary hard one… Its vary hard to call someone and explain that why I did not get Shlichus.

• lol

  agree with #16

  C805 get a life

• SPELLCHECK

  to #11
  While you’re in COLLEGE getting a life, do you think you can learn how to spell?

• Also got burned by OT

  The point system is corrupt. Lesches said so himself they are such tools. It really sucks for guys like us that want to go and get screwed over nothing to do now :( ur 1000% right!

• 100% right

  this guy is right
  the yeshivas NEED TO TAKE ON THE ACHRAYOS of finding boys a shlichus to match their behavior and abilities
  do NOT go to college though, read the Rebbe’s letters about this-no one comes out of college unchanged!!!!
  you sound like a super guy-call yeshivos, call shluchim and THEY will be the ones lucky to have you, and you them…
  Hatzlacha to all the bochurim out there

• Ch cynic

  C805 has a point, even if the way he said it sounded more like he had an axe to grind than a point to make.

  What happens when a bochur goes through the system, goes on shlichus, and gets semichah. How many yungerliet are in kollel, looking for work, looking for shlichus or just doing nothing?

  There is no shame in getting a job. There is no shame in going to school.

  Get an education, learn a skill, work hard and you will succeed. Bochur shlichus is what you make of it, but rarely is there infrastructure in place to enable that bochur to grow and be productive. Might as well spend the year preparing for the inevitable reality that is life.

• A bit of advice

  Well written! i myself had a similar issue, instead of going on shlichus ‘altz the Yeshiva’, i went independently. i went as a dorm counselor to a yeshiva where my good friends were shluchim. even though i wasn’t officially sent, the yeshiva & bochurim treated me as a shliach. It was the smartest thing i did.

• #7

  Zalmen C.

  I apologize, i was not attacking OT; it was simply the only yeshiva that had a point system when i was in zal. I just wanted clarification on how the point system works and how a good bochur would not have enough points at the end of the year.

• The Best Is Yet To Come

  Even if the Hanhola mad their decision for the wrong reason – ultimately, everything is the way it is supposed to be. If the Shlichus door is closed it is evident that the One Above has another door open for you. I am certain that if you broaden your perspective you will find the perfect opportunity for your unique mission wide open! My suggestion would be to talk with a good friend (or Rav you trust) and explore the possibilities; who knows, you may find the road less traveled will yield the greatest of rewards :-)

• Gedaliah Goodman

  You young kids are badly mistaken, or very poorly educated. You, all of you, are on shlichut, like it or not. The Rebbe MHM already
  told us, all of us, that we are on shlichut. You are not required to go out from any office or be sent to a specific place. That my
  boys is called a job. There are hundreds of young men out in the world, very, very, capable young shlichim, out there extremely sucessful, without being sent out from any office. On a personal note: when the Rebbe MHM asked me to do my special shlichus, the Rebbe MHM told me to go to R. Chodakov, & I answered the Rebbe MHM,
  no, I do not want to be part of the shlichim being sent out from the official office. (this is b’kitzur, in short). The Rebbe MHM asked my why, & I answered the Rebbe MHM. The Rebbe MHM became very serious, and said,—–(not necessary to write here), and then
  said, do this as a special shlichus for me. That was more than 25 years ago. It’s very different now. Everyone, men, women & children were given the command to be shlichim, and we are, like it or not. We all have ONE shlichus to do. Do it, you are a shliach of the Rebbe MHM, don’t do it, you will still be a shliach, that’s the command, but it will only be a JOB, just like ANY other job in the world. Be matzliach, it’s up to you, & you & you. See you in 770 for a farbrengen this week, Tues. 26th Sivan, B’Ezrat HaShem, after the Rebbe MHM’s shacharis minyan, b’erach.
  YECHI HAMELECH

• this is what i would do:

  1) find (by yourself) a yeshivah that would appreciate another shliach and join the group thats going there. or,
  2)find another bochur with the same problem and go with him to help a chabad house for the year

• israel

  nachman doesnt care all he cares about is people who suck up to him

• 345

  everyone settle down.

• israel

  why should we setle i also dont have shlichus and no one cares . the yeshiva of ohlei torah zal is like a factory they dont give a darn about you

• qq

  and when you have a nutty old man like shmerl as you’r mashgiach it makes things harder.

• 345 to israel

  so if ot is a factory and they dont give a darn about u so move on with life.go to college.get a degree,ur gonna get married soon and ur going to need to work.if u don’t go to college,ur not gonna know what hit

• TY

  OT AND SHAPIRO

• in sympathy

  All my boys got cheated by the system & one is ADD too. The others aren’t. I feel for you, I just don’t know what to tell you. I’m so burned out from dealing with these idiots.

  Of course, if your last name was the “right” one or you had some kind of influence (money or yichus or relatives in high places) you wouldn’t be writing this.

  the system is rotten through & through but I don’t see it changing. My suggestion: find your own shlichus. All my boys did, it worked out very well for all of them they went on to Smicha with their friends & then marriage.

  Good luck, you sound like a dynamic young man. If I had a daughter….ADD shouldnt be a stigma, its not a disease.

• Dangerous

  We’re all shluchim of the Rebbe. It’s just that some of us get the official title “sh’liach”, which can be dangerous – like what happened to the shluchim that Moshe Rabbeinu sent out as told in last week’s parsha.

• C508

  I did not go to collage. I wish.
  I can’t spell because I went to a lubavitch cheder.
  I can’t go to collage because I have no deploma or GED.
  Now I have a life. I work part time, I’m getting a GED & I’m haveing the time of my life.
  No more hanholo & no more crap.

• seminary too

  its the same sytstem with the girls. Not everyone gets into seminary either. its alright stay behind it only works out for the best! i did and im glad i did

• college is NOT a guarantee for work

  and the effects it has on your Yiddsihkeit-especially when it is mixed classes aren’t worth it.
  Hashem helps you find work, not your college degree. There are many ways to get training nowadays in a frum environment and at the right time.

• Bochur in OTU

  WHY DIDNT YOU MAKE A DEAL WITH SHMERL FOR THE LAST TWO MONTH???
  many buchrim did!!

• Pop

  Don’t let this get you down. When you get beyond the yeshivas and institutions, ADD is no longer an issue. You will find your niche in life. Your ADD can be a gift. It helps you think and function outside the box. There a so many more opportuinities and possibilities in life. Hashem will help you harness your talents and you will have hatzlocha.

• corrupt and more corrupt

  ..and then there’s the push, pull, in, out, protectzia and all that jazz…

  really a disgrace about who goes where and for what reasons…OT is totally corrupt…All you need is push and pull. so, so corrupt

• OT Alumni Who Passed The System By Far

  Hey you know what I was in OT not so long ago and got shlichus to a place which is not one of the better ones. Although I had a very successful year which i enjoyed, It is not the place for someone who past the OT system by far. I left OT With at least 5 extra points in each Seder. Ya that means I never missed a Morning Chasidus the entire year!

  Stats: Parents BT (not Gezsh)!And din’t suck up to no one!

  Good Luck all those going on Shlichus.

• to #11 & #17

  the rebbe was all up against college get yourselves mashpiem and FAST!!!

• Zevi K.

  I agree one thousand percent with this Bochur. If anything i would write harsher things. The “system” is corrupt. Hanola members themselves say it. Yeshivos are just trying to “get by”. Its ridicules the pain and agony a decent bochur has to go through to get accepted to yeshiva, let alone shlichus. I know many bochurim this year that went to less sedarim then me and managed to get shlichus due to the fact they have money or had some strings to pull.

  Anyone who did not go through the “system” has no right AT ALL to object to anything this bochur said!!

• CALL FOR ACTION

  WE NEED TO MAKE A PROGRAM THAT PUTS SHLUCHIM / HANOLAH INTUCH WITH BOCHRIM LOOKING TO GO ON SHLICHUS, AND THEIR IS ALSO SOMETHING BETTER FOR THIS, YOU CAN MEET FACE TO FACE AND GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER BEFORE GOING ON SHLICHUS UNLIKE THE YESHIVA SHLICHUS

• shliach

  Your article has brought up a lot of feelings and emotions by me.
  Although, i am sure you are good Bochur, and work hard, and try your best, Shlichus is NOT a Birthright. When the Rebbe sent shluchim to Yeshivos, not everyone was sent, actually, most Bochurim were not sent, and these Bochurim went to 770, Yeshiva continues.
  I am a married guy. When i was in Yeshiva, i did not miss a minute of Seder, i learnt well, even wrote a few Chidushim, and tried to get out as much as i could from the Yeshiva and Hanahalah. I was sent on Shlichus, and very well there. I got Semicha, and continued my learning. In short i was a Bochur that fit well in the system.
  I got married and went to kolel. when i finished Kolel i looked for Shlichus, and so far have not gotten anything. I am learning the hard way that in LUbavitch it is not what you know, but who you know.
  I am currently stacking Sheleves in a Grocery Store, that is how a am supporting myself.

• Everything is gonna be alright

  The “system” threw me over many times i cant say im that religous i tried really really hard when i was in the system and i meant every bit of it but after a while when the teachers wouldnt step i pretty much thought it was a dead road to go down and decided to get a job instead and im happy where i am today but it was those few good shluchim that did help me and were there by my side who really kept me going for the time that i did

  So this is to you “zalmam” or whatever your name may be you sound like an amazing guy and i wish you lots of luck with next year but i just want to remind you that you can think out of the box sometimes and remember you can get your own shlichus (if i had a chabad house i would take you in a heartbeat) or do something else with your time and lots of luck with everything

• WHY DOES -GEZSH - MATTER

  @ #43 why does “gezh” have to do with anything please explain this to me if your a good chassidishe guy and do what your supposed to why does it matter

  if i hire you to do a job do i ask you where you were born i dont care all i need to know id that you can do the job that i am hiring you to do who give where your from what nationality ethnicity etc. WHY PLEASE EXPLAIN

  SINCE WHEN DID CHABAD BECOME THOROUGHBREDS AND HAVE TO CHECK OUR ANCESTRY?????

• My 5c

  Coming from a different angle. I too suffer from learning issues, and when shlichus time came I was not even considered an option. But I landed on shlichus anyway, how by calling some yeshivas in Israel and creating a program with the hanhala. This has been done before in FL so I am not unique and in Vancouver. Grab some guys, start a small yeshiva in a Chabad House city for example. The program I started still exists and is now an official shlichus with OT. Otherwise start a business if you cant wing it.

• DO NOT COME TO MORRISTOWN YESHIVAH.

  IN MORRISTOWN THIS YEAR WAS 45 20 YEARS OLD BOCHURIM. THIS 45 BOCHURIM WANTED TO GO ON SHLICHUS.
  THE PROBLEM IS THAT R’ SPALTER DOS NOT HAVE A PLACE TO EVERY ONE.
  THIS YEAR WAS JUST 22 BOCHURIM FROM MORRISTOWN SENT ON SHLICHUS.
  THE OTHER 23 THEY NEED TO FIND SOMETHING TO DO NEXT YEAR.
  EVEN THAT YOU LEARN AND COME TO SEIDER EVERY DAY.
  THE YESHIVAS DO NOT WANT ANYMORE BOCHURIM FROM MORRISTOWN.
  THEY KNOW THE TRUTH ABOUT MORRISTOWN.
  SO IF YOU WANT TO GET SHLICHUS IN THE FUTURE DO NOT COME TO MORRISTOWN YESHIVAH.
  DO NOT COME TO MORRISTOWN YESHIVAH.

• To #49

  You must be a troll. Either that or youve been under a rock your whole life.

  SINCE WHEN DID CHABAD BECOME THOROUGHBREDS AND HAVE TO CHECK OUR ANCESTRY?????

  Since they were in Nevel, you moron. Grow up and face the truth. Its not what you know it who you know. The Gezh stick together and look out for their own. The rest are nothing.

• Funcused

  So, let me get this straight.
  You have ADD.
  But you failed the system because you missed too many Sedorim?

• to 36

  Last week’s parsha you mention? What about this week’s? “Kol ha’eida kulom kedoishim.. umadu’ah tisnas’u al k’hal Hashem?” That was Korach talking.. not Moshe.

• Milhouse

  Zalman, you need to understand that while a bochur who goes on yeshivah shlichus certainly gains tremendously from it, that is not the purpose of the shlichus. The purpose is to give, not to get; the question is not what you would gain from the yeshivah, but what the yeshivah would gain from you. And you have to consider that perhaps the hanholo was right in deciding that the particular talents that Hashem gave you are not ones that would enable you to do this particular job.

  Hashem made everybody different, and gave everybody a unique set of talents that suit him for certain tasks in life and not for others. There are many different jobs in the world that need to be done; every single one is important, or the world would not survive. The world needs doctors, but if everyone was a doctor we would all starve to death; so Hashem made a certain number of people with the talents to be doctors, and others to be farmers and produce food. He also made some people to be mechanchim, some to be plumbers, some to be full-time talmidei chachomim, etc. Your shlichus may be in a field that you hadn’t considered until now, but that should not discourage you.

  How do you know what your shlichus is? Your disability may guide you. Moshe Rabbenu had a speech disability, so he concluded that his shlichus was not to be a public speaker but to be a shepherd, where speech isn’t necessary and his other talents would speak for themselves. And he was very good at it, until at the age of 80 Hashem revealed to him that his real shlichus was in public speaking, and that he had been created without this talent only so that when he started speaking eloquently everyone would know that it was a miracle. But unless Hashem has appeared to you and told you something like this, you should assume that the talents you don’t have are the ones you don’t need on your shlichus, and therefore you should look for your shlichus in an area that doesn’t need those talents, and does need the ones you do have.

• Just To Clarify

  to C805: i’m not sure what your experience in life has been so far but i was on shlichus this year and i can tell you that it definitely prepared me a lot for the real world; having to fundraise for peulos, learning how to talk to and deal with people, etc. it definitely showed me a glimpse of the harsh reality we live in! even if i dont go on shlichus after marriage shlichus has helped me for life in a major way!
  to CH cynic: i’m not saying going to college is a shame but i know many, many yungerleit who didnt go to school and are now b”h supporting themselves very well, i also know people who went to school and sadly don’t make a living, so you cant generalize that

• larry

  my head hurts from all this. the WHOLE yeshiva thing sucks there is no hart or feeling careing to many people have their heads up their — there has to be change and i am out of it 20 years and it still make me sick. thats were i lost all respect for the yeshivas

• You are Wrong

  If a bochur is ADD or ADHD you should have been taking piils for this. If you didn’t – how do you expect to go to a Yeshiva on Shlichus (where younger bochrim look up to you) and not sit still and learn. This is not OK. Your parents should have put you on ridolin to cure you. Sorry – you are wrong!

• To #58

  Sounds like you know nothing about the condition. Medication is not the solution to ADD – every case is different.

• Deeper Issues

  “Zalman” than you for writing this. What we write abot only scratches the surface of the Problems of the current “system”. Firstly, in general the vast majority of frum schools and yeshivas have no idea how to deal with any learning disabilities (including ADD which I also have). Even if they claim they do they likely have someone who went to Turo college or some otter Mickey mouse school who is a “therapist” because that’s what everyone else took.

  The problem I see with the system is that they prepare you to go along a set path, but there are many gaps and holes along the way that you can fall through. It’s simply not fair or responsible. What exactly do they expect people to do who do not get Shlichus? Even worse. are those unfortunate souls sittig in Kollel for years, struggling to support their families. It’s truly heartbreaking.

  I struggled through the system and I am in a semi-decent situation, but I can assure you, I will be doing everything in my power to help my children avoid the pitfalls of this system. Even if tue don’t turn out “shpitz” I’d much rather kids with deep Ahavas Yisrol, Yiray Shamayim and an honest way to earn a living.

  Good luck to you! Keep smiling, keep yor head high, and do what’s right for YOU.

  P.S . Don’t stress your ADD too much.

• over 100 bochurim

  My question is this. What if this Zalman guy did get shlichus, how would that solve the problem for the other 100 bochurim who didn’t get shlichus?

• Zalman C

  First of all I want to thank all those who made time to comment.
  Also to the kind people who emailed me at shlichus5772@gmail.com

  If there is one comment I must reply to its #55
  NEVER have I been told something so hurtful and disgusting. your a bucket of cold water on the encouragement I have been getting.

  You want me to understand that the point of shlichus is to give not to get. I want to have the opportunity to give to others like I was given to. I want to go and be a shliach so I can give and get. Nobody will disagree that the Bucher gets as much if not more then who he is giving to.
  You said “You have to consider that perhaps the hanholo was right in deciding that the particular talents that Hashem gave you are not ones that would enable you to do this particular job” WHAT?! Did you read the article? This is my point. Ya, hanoholo decided that I dont have the ‘talent’ for shlichus, this is my point. No i’m not the best learner, but this dose not change anything about my ability to go on shlichus.

  My learning disability dose not change anything. Like you said, Moshe had a speech problem and still became the Jewish leader. I can become who ever I want despite MY disability. The way I plan and hope to live my life mandates that I live in a Kosher Chasidish environment.

  You Comment Is a warped support for my Op Ed. You have helped everyone understand what kind of people run hanholo.

  That said I wish to comment on some other comments.

  To #28: This is exactly what I want to do. I want to get in to a program but its much harder then you think. Nobody as of yet has wanted me.

  To #58: Your comment about taking meds for A.D.D. is vary true.
  My parents decided not to put me on these medications for whatever resin. I dont think they are the magic cure but they can help.

  One of my Big problems is I dont have the skills that I need to learn. I cant read and translate gemoro vary well and forget about Rashi & Tosfos. Giving me Meds now would give me the ability to sit, but not to learn. IF I had meds from shir Aleph Misivta it would be a totally different story. Over 6 years of sitting and learning would help me to pick up these skills. But the damage has already been done. so ATTENTION ALL PARENTS: You may be afraid to give meds to your kids because you dont want the side effects. Well a huge side effect of NOT giving the meds is there lack of learning skills.

  To #53: How did A.D.D. affect shlichus? Because When you cant sit in your seat its hard to get marked on time. When you dont get marked you dont add up. when you dont add up you dont get shlichus, regardless of your important talents.

• Milhouse

  #58, While drugs are sometimes necessary, they are rarely an answer. Unless the problem is severe, and life is unbearable without them, it’s far better to adapt ones lifestyle to ones nature than to cripple ones body and force it to ignore the signals it’s getting from the way Hashem created it. Ritalin is very far from a cure; it’s a poison that is sometimes necessary, r“l, but should never be taken lightly. It usually does its job, but at a price which is often not worth paying.

  If going on shlichus was the only goal Zalman’s parents had for him, then perhaps had they put him on Ritalin it would have worked, and he could have faked being the kind of bochur who gets snapped up on shlichus. But that would have been a *wrong* thing to do, because the risk far outweighs such a tiny benefit. Far better that he is the kind of bochur that he is, the kind that Hashem made him, and that he learn how to be the person that Hashem wants him to be, rather than copying what Hashem perhaps wants his friends to be.

  Oh, and about geza hachasidim, or ”gezh“: yichus is a wonderful thing. Rashi tells us that Yitzchok was answered before Rivkoh because he had better yichus. Let nobody disparage it. But what you have to realise is that yichus doesn’t make you a better person. Money is also a wonderful thing to have, and so is good health, but neither of them make you a better person. A good person *with* yichus, money, and good health, is better off than a good person without those qualities; but a bad person with all those qualities is still a bad person. Korach had a wonderful yichus, but he was still Korach. You don’t get more ”gezh” than Berke Gourarie, but who would want to be him? So no, gezh is not the be all and end all, but nor is it anything to be mocked or put down. When combined with other good qualities it is something to be proud of and to cherish if you have it, or to admire if you don’t.

• think

  This article is completely irrelevant.

  Even if every bochur would be perfect, there still would not be enough spots! You would miss out anyway.

• TO COMMENT 51! KUDOS!

  AS ONE OF THOSE SCREWED OVER BY SHPALTER I PUT FULL FORCE BEHIND WHAT YOU SAID! STAY AWAY FROM MORRISTOWN AND FAR AWAY FROM SHPALTER!HE IS A SLIMY CORRUPT UNSTABLE PERSON!

• Your chance hasn-t passed

  As a bochur who was “burned” by the yeshiva system as well, I can relate to your story. I have been out of the “system” for two years now. I was supposed to be going to NY for Shiur Daled (pre-shlichus) but of course was “burned” by the system. So instead I started making calls to shluchim to see if they were looking for any bochurim. I suggest you do the same. Think of where you would like to go and find out who the shliach is. Give him a call and tell him that you (and maybe some of your friends) would like to go on shlichus. I am doing it for the second year already (third year out of yeshiva) and I have to say that Baruch HaShem it is going well.
  Take the initiative. Be proactive.
  As for shidduchim, sure people will look at you and say, “oh he didn’t get shlichus from the yeshiva….”, but are those the people you really want to associate with.
  Believe me, I have many more things going against me when it comes to shidduchim but frankly anybody who is going to say, “oh look, he is a ”yeshiva drop out” or the like, I want to have nothing to do with them.

  Hatzlacha

• woow

  very well said good luck to u and all the rest of teh bochurim with this problem . something needs to change with this system ! now !

• woow

  very well said good luck to u and all the rest of teh bochurim with this problem . something needs to change with this system ! now !

• @58

  @58
  I hope you are telling a very poor tasting joke and you don’t actually believe what you say. Blaming it on the fact that he wasn’t taking meds, (which, by the way, you don’t know that he wasn’t) is in very poor taste. Who says he wasn’t? And even if he wasn’t, who says that is to blame?
  I have worked the last two years at a camp where my job was to deal with the “trouble kids”. You know, the kids that are constantly getting into fights, the one’s that none of the counselors want to deal with. Often times these are kids that just need some personalized attention. A lot of these “trouble kids” have ADD or ADHD and they just need someone to sit down with them.
  Why condemn them just because of a medical condition? Instead of shoving meds on them and expecting the condition to go away, why don’t you try showing the love.

• problamatic

  #13 I TRIED THAT APX 5 YEARS AGO, AND THE SHLIACH SAID THEY HAVE A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF MONEY THEY HAVE FOR THESE BOCHRIM. I OFFERED TO PAY HIM. HE SAID HE COULDN’T DO THAT. AND YES, MY SON TOO IS CHASIDISH, RELIGIOUS, KEPT SAIDER, FFB, GEZHA, ALL OF THE ABOVE. I’M NOT SURE WHAT THE ANSWER TO THIS PROBLEM IS. WE JUST KNOW THAT IT IS A PROBLEM.

• Rabbi with a degree

  I got shlichus to a place I didn’t like and turned it down. I ended up helping a shliach who I liked in a place I liked, continued along to get smicha and then went through college and secured a very decent job and career nad have a wonderful family.

  Looking back, I was BH blessed with siyata dishmaya and a bit of mazal.

• Nobody

  To #58 – not everyone is naturally of a type to sit in Yeshiva Zal. The idea that they should be taking the chemical equivalent of cocaine and risking addiction over it is ridiculous. Some people have real ADD or ADHD and need medication. Easily the majority (according to some 75%) are taking medication they don’t need. As you see in this case, here you have someone who had to change their middos – very hard work, but they are a much better person for not having gone the medication route.

  The problem here is that there are not enough Shlichus places for the number of students. I was in Yeshiva just before that became a problem where it was very tight, but any decent bochur who could go did.

  What ended up happening is that the Shlichus system destroyed the Yeshiva learning program afterwards. 770 has long been a joke, but back in my time there were no alternatives (since Bochurim wanted to be near the Rebbe). Serious learning stopped after Shlichus for the majority of Bochurim. Study for Smicha and get married and that was it. But Shlichus became a requirement to be part of the Yeshiva system.

  Now, there are not enough spaces for the Bochrim that still belong in Yeshiva (those who are being matzliach there, like our writer), but there is no place for them to go. That is a disaster.

  And then the suggestion is College, R“L. Even the Goyim are saying it is not a good way to earn a living anymore (Google ”Higher Education Bubble”). If Bochurim have money for College, they have money to pay for a Yeshiva as an alternative to Shlichus, and someone who is actually in Chinuch needs to start one that is just as respectable as Shlichus.

  There is a reason that the Rebbe Rashab said that you have to think about Chinuch for an hour a day – it is constantly changing, and you have to adjust to the current reality.

• Dovid W

  Sorry to say it but welcome to life, and many times Life isn’t fair. Trust in God and move forward.

• gys

  Why do you need someone to tell you or give you a official shlichus? That should not stop you.You can do shlichus on your own doo you want suggestions I would be more than happy to suggest a Self Shlichus within our region. After all it’s about doing the Rebbe’s work & not politics etc. You don’t need anyone to tell you what yes or what no

• 20 year old educator

  To 72 Your comment is 100% right on target. 58 is a tard

  BUT

  I think there is another way to look at it.

  The guy who made this article probably likes learning, just cant. In my expirance (all of 20 years and with add) I can say this:

  When you have a.d.d. you cant sit in one place. This leads to 6 years of not so solid learning skills. If the child’s years of learning would be solid he would have those skills. SO, Zalman is missing the basic learning skills (because the elementary schools suk) and his 6 years did help, but not much. So now he is at the end of the yeshivah line and he cant read a Rashi.

  IF he would have taken medication he WOULD have had the ‘zits flish’ to sit and learn over 6 years. By this time he would have gained the skills to sit over a gemoro and ‘kovetz miforshim’ for a looooooong time and be HAPPY doing it!

  Based on this i dare say that Zalman did not take medication & he wishes he would have. (am I right zalman?)

  So while there is bad side effects, there is good as well.

• to the author

  This is going to be very encouraging – at least thats my point in writing this. Before i start though – i want to say that i do not agree with you at all in saying AD/HD is a mental disorder – because it is not!!!! Nor is it a handicap at all!!!! it simply is a different way that your brain is. In fact tons of people who have ADD or ADHD are very highly intellegent.

  Please dont let anything stop you from obtaining you dreams. Especially because you just happen to have ADD. I myself, have ADHD and am an Occupational Therapy student. My dad has ADHD and has been a full fledged top doctor since the age of 23!!!!!

  My point is, whatever you dream, as long as you work hard, you can achieve it!!!! I wish you all the best!!!!

• Beis Chabad of Geodon

  Sadly, in my travels I have met bochurim on shlichus who should be taking something a lot stronger than Ritalin, and some who should be taking Antabuse because all they’re doing is getting shikker every day. (They are a minority. It is usually one bad apple and one sucker who looks up to the bad apple and joins him).

  These bad apples get through, and better bochurim are denied, because of pull, family connections or gelt.

  However, there are alternatives and unofficial shlichus out there – hatzlocho.

• what`s the problem

  Since when does everyone have to “get” shlichus (what does it mean to “get” slichus anyway). what a bochur is supposed to do is sit and learn. There are limited yeshivos to be sent to. so if you are not being sent anywhere just find a place to sit and learn. there is no issue of “a 100 bochurim not being sent on slichus”. what is wrong with learning in 770.

• yossi

  if your that worthy of shlichus, then i would tell you to sit and learn another year, or do smicha.
  i think your really NOT intrested in learning. and just want to complain the system…

• zack

  go to school get a trade be a frum chassideshe yungerman, give tzdaka have shiurim to go on dhlichus today you have to marry a head schliachs daughter

• someone who knows whats going on

  just would like to clarify.
  the truth is that the idea of shlichus -factualy- means a bochur learning in a yeshiva without paying tuition. the yeshiva agrees to take only those who they think will help them with their goals. the sending yeshiva has no control on the receiving yeshiva to force them to take mr. so-and-so, they only suggest and cojole, but the receiving yeshiva is always looking first and foremost for what is the bast choice of bochur who could help them.
  after saying this-meaning that this is mostly a financial problem- sometimes parents or friends make a deal with the recaiving yeshiva, to help them pay for the cost of upkeep of this bochur.
  if not there is a true problem. this has nothing to do with geza or even being a casidisher bochur, it just simply is the survival of the fittest- only a limited amount of yeshivois take only a limited amount of bochurim and therefore pick out only a few out of the total available.
  true this is a terrible system. but the fact is- there is no united organization caring about all talmidim and all yeshivois.
  there is not enough money being put into yeshivois to help them upgrade their staff to divide their attention to each individual. you wouldn’t beleive how much behind, the staff is -in many yeshivois- in getting their wages, and therefore are depreesd to a certain degree -on top of everything else.
  i don’t see any change in this as long as all this machloikes is going on- where every one is pulling to his own and not caring for the general klal.hashem yerachem!!!!

• exch-r

  To #55

  Your condescension is breathtaking. I have no clue as to who wrote the Op-Ed but who the hell are you to tell him what his job is in life? Why? Because he has ADD? Shame on you!

  The reality is that it’s a tough system to crack these days and many decent and fine bochurim just do not make the cut . Often times it has more to with the ego of the mashgiach than with the quality of the bochur (It’s well behind me now and with a very busy life involving a business and a young family ka”h, a distant memory. But I know how it’s become in recent years).

  To those in charge: I would urge you the pressures of your job notwithstanding and despite the realities with which you struggle, that you approach your duties with love and kindness. Please remember that you are educating bochurim who have never seen the Rebbe (and if they have, the memories would be vague at best).

  We live in a Dor Yosom. These are young kids becoming young men in a much scarier and much more unpredictable world than the one you came of age into. If a decent ehrlicher bochur wants to go on shlichus, LET HIM GO.

  Please don’t play tit for tat. It’s not about you. You are a grown man and should be bigger than that. Please stop using shlichus as a bargaining chip to ensure his shmiras hasdorim. Shmiras hasdorim in Tomchei Temimim is sacred so inculcate in him a sense of privilege instead. Show him that you care if you do and if you don’t promptly seek another avenue for your livelihood.

  Show him kindness today and you will affect his future generations. Don’t let him become bitter about shlichus. Because when he does it is but a small step to becoming bitter about yiddishkeit, such was the education he received and it is ingrained in him that they are one and the same.

  I wish the author only the best of luck in all his future endeavors.

• small communities

  there are lots of smaller communities with Chabad Houses, and lots of orthodox synagogues with many non-observant Jews. Move to these cities, get a job, learn a trade such as plumbing, electrician, etc… and support the community as a leader. Learning in the evening, Shabbos and etc with the community. You show people that one can work during the day while still being an observant Jew. Outside of the large Jewish communities it can be rare to find an observant Jew who is not a Rabbi but works a regular job.

• #83 - you need to get out more!

  “ Outside of the large Jewish communities it can be rare to find an observant Jew who is not a Rabbi but works a regular job.”

  Sounds like you’ve not traveled much! There is life outside of New York where frum yidden hold ‘regular jobs’

• Wife of an unacknowledged ADHD guy

  I’m married to someone in denial about having ADHD. He is extremely bright, but you have to live with him to see this. On the surface, it looks like he gets words wrong when he reads out loud. But somehow, he understands the words anyway, and his insights about very deep chassidus are awesome. He’s also quite creative and has a great sense of humor. And he’s a good Yid, honest, B“H, who loves learning and loves Torah.

  That being said, he has some behavioral issues — impulsivity problems (K”A“H, nothing self-destructive), impatience in interpersonal situations, and he is often flighty about remembering things (even when he did a good job of faking paying attention).

  I highly recommend that you find the best professional person you can, to help you cope with your ADHD and build on your strengths, to make up for whatever you feel you may lack.

  I also recommend you ignore the negative letters and read carefully the letters from the people who found creative ways to make their own shlichus and/or arrange to join their chevra on their shlichus as ”one more extra (unofficial) guy“. L’chatchila ariber!

  But please do everything you can to learn the alternatives to help you maximize your potential, whether it be meds, counseling, training that builds on your strengths, etc. Read every book you can on the subject. Your success as a husband and father, and in parnassah, will depend on this. Don’t be in denial, like my husband, as great a guy as he is.

  PS– it’s not a mental illness like you said; it’s neurological. Please don’t think you’re ”crazy“ or ”mentally ill”; you’re not. But you do need to seek the best help you can. You have the potential to be extremely successful, but it won’t happen if you go into denial.

  You sound like a great guy — bracha v’hatzlocha, b’gashmius u’b’ruchnius.

• about morristown 5771

  IN MORRISTOWN THIS YEAR WAS 45 20 YEARS OLD BOCHURIM. THIS 45 BOCHURIM WANTED TO GO ON SHLICHUS.
  THE PROBLEM IS THAT R’ SPALTER DOS NOT HAVE A PLACE TO EVERY ONE.
  THIS YEAR WAS JUST 22 BOCHURIM FROM MORRISTOWN SENT ON SHLICHUS.
  THE OTHER 23 THEY NEED TO FIND SOMETHING TO DO NEXT YEAR.
  EVEN THAT YOU LEARN AND COME TO SEIDER EVERY DAY.
  THE YESHIVAS DO NOT WANT ANYMORE BOCHURIM FROM MORRISTOWN.
  THEY KNOW THE TRUTH ABOUT MORRISTOWN.
  SO IF YOU WANT TO GET SHLICHUS IN THE FUTURE DO NOT COME TO MORRISTOWN YESHIVAH.
  DO NOT COME TO MORRISTOWN YESHIVAH.

• to # 86

  to #86
  this is truth.
  i was in morristown this year. do not go to morristown next year.
  you are not getting shlichus….

• out of town

  to # 84… I’m #83, I’m talking about places in Montana, Louisiana, Tennessee, Arkansas,

• to #86 & #87

  I don’t know what you’re talking about. I was there with you, and I got shlichus. if you were
  “I do not
  Touch my beard in any way, have a chup, listen to goyishe music, watch TV or movies and I do not smoke (anything).

  I do
  Walk in the street with my hat and jacket, go to the Mikvah every single day, and Daven with a Minyan.

  In other words when I walk down the streets of Crown Heights, I blend in with all the other Bochurim. I look, sound and act like any other good Bochur.”
  But since you’re not, of course spalter ain’t gonna arrange anything for you

• To #84

  You obviously didnt read 83’s comment…he said outside of large Jewish communities, not outside NY…and he is true outside places like NY, NJ, Phillie/Pittsburgh, Chicago, Baltimore, Cleveland, LA etc small places like montana, south dakota etc the frum jews there GENERALLY are rabbis…

• bad spelling

  wow boys have really bad spelling. compare these comments to the comments and the type of language on seminary op eds.

  speaking of which, both systems seem to have many issues at this crucial point. boys and girls. sem and shlichus. going where you aren’t known…

• The truth from a real mechanech

  While you are obviously a most lovely bochur and have great intentions, you and the other “ADD” bochrim in my yeshiva made my life a misery, every time i tried controlling the Zal you guys came along and made major bitul torah! ADD or not, I cannot take achrayus for you to go to another yeshiva and destroy their yeshivah! you already caused enough damage.

  You will do much better work if you went to a shliach and used your energy to be mekarev yidden to yiddishkeit.

  The only complaint that you can have is 1. We should send you to a Shliach for the Shlichus year 2. we should of thrown you out in shiur aleph when your ADD first started ruining the seder of yeshiva and the dorm.

• shpalter needs a tellmarkiting job

  to 89. Your a retard. I was in Morristown with you and I did not get shlichus.
  I sent a email to this guy because he is just like me.
  I am a good boy, but I have a hard time learning. That’s why I was barly in zal. Shpalter don’t give a darn, never said anything to me the entire year.
  read the article one more time. You missed some important points.

  ohJ ya, don’t go to morristown. YeverU

• To #89

  To number #89! Please stop spewing your lies! I as well was one of the bochurim who did not get shlichus from spalter, and im lucky I was able to arrange one myself and for a few of friends. But sly and slimy spalter, not only failed to give shlichus to a majority of the bochurim, but actually stood in the way of many of us that were all around good bochurim this year – our only deficiency was: We didnt suck up to him!

  That is all the corrupt spalter cares about! Nothing connected with being a chassidishe bochur or someone who can give over a tremendous amount to Yeshivos in his shlichus tickles his fancy.

  All thats required to get shlichus from spalter is to lick and suck up to him!

• morrisotwn

  stay away from morristown

• Motown bochur

  Morristown rocks the house and is the best place to go because they do look at every bochur individually and there is no point system or the like!
  It happens to be that a lot of the bochurim who did not get shlichus this year had to do with the fact that they are from Detroit and after what happened with the Detroit bochurim this past year, no yeshiva wants them anymore!
  Stop blaiming Rabbi Shpalter, he sent out a good 60 bochurim last year including guys who did not deserve it!

• To 92 real mechanech

  And it is exactly because of people like you we has a system that we have. Uneducated teachers who don’t know what it means to be a professional teacher. Most of you don’t have teaching skills and are doing it because it’s job and you need to support your families – not because you are decent teachers. Your comments make me sick, and it’s exactly because of people like you that we have so many kids going off the path. If I knew who you were and if I’d have the money. I’d pay you to stop teaching.

• Been there-

  I find it realllly hard to believe that a ‘real’ mechanech talks this way in todays age and time; Whats more, if this is who and what a real mechanech signifies, then all I can say, is ”Och un Vei”
  Shocked beyond words at such a response from one involved in being mechanech our boys! How tragic and how scary;
  Thats the problem today, the teachers are only there for you, as long as you ‘toe the line’, go even one step out of that line and you’re finished, dead meat, you don’t stand an absolute chance of getting anywhere, You’re written off totally; Time and time again we see this , and yes! THAT is why SO many of our boys have ‘gone of’ because of ‘real mechanim’ (r”l) like yourself, who thinking the way you do, are destroying our boys on a daily basis;
  Hashem, Ad Mosai .

• ex ch-r

  to 92

  Please do us all a favor and quit your job.. You area monster and should not even be hired as the janitor for school much less an educator

• one hundred

  i just wanna be the 100th comment

• Bi-POlar Guy

  Shalom ADD man.
  Deal with it as bext as it can. You should rule it,it should not rule you.

  I am a 62 year old male Bal Teshuvah.

  I also suffer from Bi-Polar Disorder I think there is nothing worse than this diease out side of Cancer. The trick is to find the right medication.
  I wish you well and Good Shabbos!
  -Bi Polar Guy

• craaaazy

  to 92

  How dare you write something like that? Why don’t you work with the students? Did you ever think of taking the Bachur who has ADD to a psychologist? Did you speak to his parents and ensure that he takes appropriate medications or remedies?

  A “real mechanech” would meet with the Bachur and his parents and direct him to a proper Yeshiva or Vocational school that is equipped with proper educators and professionals who can deal with the ADD personality. You can call the great esteem mechanech and chazzan and great esteemed all around mechubodike person Rabbi Nachum Caplan, he would help you with the ADD problem students, he will for sure have alot to explain and pass down to you.

• Nobody

  to #92,

  What do you think the Rebbe would say about the idea of taking a Bochur who is at the age of sitting and learning and yeshiva, and tell him – quit yeshiva, don’t get married, and go live in some out of town community and work for a Shliach with no real supervision or thought about this Bochur’s chinuch?

  I’m sure it is an appropriate option in some cases, but to say that this is the general solution for the most at-risk Bochurim, those who are not in the top half of the Yeshiva, or even the top two thirds?

• att 92

  i am almost 100pct sure that i know who you are, you are forsure the mashgiach at the yeshiva i was in this year i can see you saying this words. i think you should be fired right now!

• opportunities

  im starting up a shlichus organization, campus, working with old people, pre school, etc

  wana join

• to #21

  chony never said the point system is curupt, he said “it has wholes in it” (for example if you come 90 minuts late to nigleh you might aswell miss the whole thing cuz you anyways got a full point etc, for more deatails asl Levi L. he is a chony expert).
  what he did say is that there are ceartain members in hanhalah that get their way etc………

• to #32

  take it easy on shmeril, he is take a wall, BUT: he is from the only authentic hanhalah mebers over there that ha his head on strait, he is a tziur of a real mashgiach, and he would fir right into tomchei temimim in lubavitch, how meny masgichim can you say that about

• Yeshiva Menahel

  Not everyone is cut out for yeshiva. In the old days, a bochur who wasn’t made for learning would get a job shortly after his bar Mitzvah. Only the solid bochurim remained to learn in yeshiva through their teens to marriage. Most yeshivas had very high standards to accept a bochur – and probably 90% of todays bochurim would not qualify to get in, even if they wanted to. There is nothing wrong if a bochur who isn’t cut out for learning starts considering getting a job. It can be in kli kodesh – a sofer, a mohel, a shochet, or even a melamed of alef bais or a shammas in a shul. Not everyone is shayach to Tosfos, ktzos etc. We pretend that they are – but they aren’t! The fact that a bochur stayed on “past his expiration date” until shlichus year, doesn’t mean that he is fit to continue into a shlichus if he never made the cut.

• databochur

  before the point system, hanhala was accused of playing abusive favoritism.

  Then came the great solution, the “fair” point system.

  So now there is no one to blame. The point system is based on numbers. Either the subject logged in or he didnt.