WSJ Featuers Front-Page Story on Kiddush Clubs
After These Jewish Prayer Services, Things Come ‘To Life’ at Open Bar
Come Saturday, the Jewish Sabbath, the atmosphere at Rabbi Sholom Lipskar’s synagogue near Bal Harbour, Fla., turns festive. The eating and drinking start early.
Very early.
The synagogue, called The Shul, attracts anywhere from 500 to 800 people each week. Most attend services in the main sanctuary that start around 9 a.m. But some early birds show up for prayers that begin at 7:15 a.m. and conclude by 9:15. Then it is party time for the largely male crowd.
This elegant seaside place of worship is on the cutting edge of the Kiddush—a lavish repast that has helped transform the staid postservice fellowship hour to the kind of boozy, over-the-top spread synonymous with weddings.
Such affairs have become so de rigueur to luring congregants that Rabbi Lipskar has solicited donors for a special “Kiddush bank” to fund the pricey libations and epicurean fare that can cost anywhere from $1,800 to $3,600 per week.
“It is perfect,” says Rabbi Lipskar, whose synagogue is part of the Hasidic Lubavitch movement. “God didn’t make the delicious stuff only for non-Jews.” Those who want a shot of hard liquor—they don’t say “let’s have a drink,” but “let’s have a L’chaim,” he says, referring to the traditional Jewish toast “to life.”
“This is not a drinking fest,” he adds. “The drinks are in small cups.”
In the face of dwindling attendance at religious services, many rabbis have become similarly creative. At the Bal Harbour shul and other synagogues, the sumptuous food, fine wines and liquors are a way to help draw congregants.
As early as January, Rabbi Marc Schneier was already well into planning his synagogue’s summer worship in New York’s posh Hamptons community. He is lining up guest speakers, interviewing assistant rabbis—and considering ways to improve on the martini bar.
The “L’chaim” table of high-price spirits is the most popular feature of The Hampton Synagogue’s Saturday summer service. “There is always vodka, an assortment of single malts, tequila,” says Robert Fisher, a friend of the rabbi who serves as adviser on food and drink.
Rabbi Schneier notes that the fetes don’t get overly boisterous. It is all about the “M-word,” he insists—not martinis, but “moderation.”
The same might not be said about the food. One weekend the entrees included pan-seared sesame salmon and sliced steak with horseradish cream. There is always seafood salad—the rabbi’s favorite dish—albeit made with pollock and whiting since the congregation adheres to kosher laws banning shellfish. The “herring bar” features 12 different variations named after each of the Twelve Tribes of Israel.
Raising a glass during or after services isn’t strictly an Orthodox phenomenon, says Rabbi Gerald Skolnik, who is president of the Rabbinical Assembly, the umbrella group of Conservative rabbis. Among both Conservative and Orthodox Jews, he has witnessed what he calls “the cult of alcohol on Sabbath morning in shul,” which means men leaving even during prayers to have a drink with their buddies. As kosher certifications for wine and spirits have exploded, observant Jews have had access to finer wines—and they have indulged.
“Finding a really good Kiddush—that’s a blood sport in the Jewish community,” says Rabbi Skolnik, who presides at the Forest Hills Jewish Center in Queens, New York City.
Lincoln Square Synagogue on Manhattan’s West Side was a mob scene last Saturday as congregants gathered in the elegant new $50 million sanctuary to pray and then descended on the “Gala Kiddush”—an array of gourmet dishes piled high on different table—meant to help draw new members to the institution.
“It is very competitive,” says Ora Hamelsdorf, one of two people assigned to oversee the Kiddush.
The Orthodox synagogue’s newsletter announced the formation of its own “L’Chaim Club,” asking members to contribute $100 for the purchase of liquor. In doing so, the bulletin added, a person can partake of the booze “guilt-free.”
It wasn’t always this way. Traditionally, Kiddush consisted of some “stale sponge cake and Tam-Tam crackers,” with a smattering of herring, says Rabbi Schneier. It was a modest interlude, like its Christian counterpart, the church coffee hour.
“Once upon a time, some people went to synagogue to talk to God. Nowadays, more and more people come to see their friends,” says Jonathan Sarna, a professor of American Jewish history at Brandeis University. The prayers and sermons “are a distraction. Conviviality goes better with a drink.”
Beth Jacob Congregation of Beverly Hills has six different Kiddushes on any given Saturday, corresponding with different services, including one for “young professionals.” But the rabbi, Kalman Topp, says the growing trend is to have “breakaway Kiddushes” beyond synagogue walls. These are held in people’s homes and typically are men-only, with liquor being a big attraction.
“It usually involves quality whiskey,” says Rabbi Topp. “The perception is, the more expensive the bottle, the more prestigious the Kiddush.”
In Westhampton, N.Y., Rabbi Schneier’s synagogue has private sponsors each week who shell out $7,200 for food and $1,800 or more for the ever-changing bar—which may, incidentally, include rum-based mojitos, Champagne-infused Bellinis and the like. The L’chaim liquor table costs an additional $1,800—so the total can exceed $10,000 for a single Sabbath. Despite the steep cost, there are always eager sponsors, says the rabbi.
Last year in Bal Harbour, one donor made an unusual contribution. Each Friday afternoon, on the eve of the Sabbath, his driver appeared carrying a leather suitcase with a giant 1.75 liter bottle of Johnnie Walker Blue label tucked inside. At the Saturday Kiddush, a special volunteer handed out shot glasses of the $500 scotch. “It went pretty fast,” Rabbi Lipskar says.
Some of the faithful cast a cold eye on such excess. “It is very upsetting. It is not in keeping with Jewish standards of modesty,” says Rabbi Tzvi Hersh Weinreb, executive vice president emeritus of the Orthodox Union, an umbrella organization for Orthodox congregations.
Neither does Rabbi Hershel Billet, of Woodmere, N.Y., approve of heavy drinking as a part of synagogue culture. He recalls how, a few years ago, men were getting up and leaving in the middle of his own services. “They’d return drunk, loud. It had to stop,” he says.
While he himself likes a glass of fine wine, he decided to ban liquor in the synagogue several years ago. Some members left in protest.
Meanwhile, Kiddush in the Hamptons is shaping up to be more upscale than ever. On a recent evening, Rabbi Schneier and Mr. Fisher brainstormed about the season ahead, which starts on Mother’s Day weekend and lasts till Thanksgiving.
“Do you think we could have a Kentucky Derby Kiddush?” Mr. Fisher muses. Some summer residents start the season early by coming to check on their homes. “We could serve mint juleps,” he says. The women, he imagines, could don fancy hats.
This practice is obscene!
It’s a terrible example for minors. These people are
shallow and self-indulgent. Would that most of
this money would go to worthy charitable causes –
even if these sponsors already support good causes.
A kiddush after the davening is one thing. Leaving
the sanctuary during davening for this is (or
certainly should be) unacceptable. Am less than impressed with these so-called spiritual (non-)
leaders.
Anony-mouse
Great. Now as well as looking weird (as per New York Slimes) we’re a bunch of alcoholics & gluttons, & ready to keel over from heart disease or cirrhosis.
Mavin
What a shameful waste of money that could have gone towards far more urgent causes in the jewish community.
If the rabbis had an ounce of self respect, they would close these shuls down completely rather than tolerate these drunken bacchanalias in a mokom kodosh.
oy
this is what chabad has come to? HaShem Yerachem
Hey
Unzereh Mazel is that the 770 hoodlins have no taste in food or mashke……
Yechi Kratz Bros. Catering!
zalmen chain
$3 per person is hardly expensive. YY Kratz & mafia (gaboim) charge alot more per person. You only get 1 bottle of red smirnoff.
Puke
Feh!
OY
I SECOND THE EMOTION. i LIKE A GR8 KIDDUSH AS MUCH AS THE NEXT PERSON ONCE IN A WHILE, BUT THIS IS NOT RIGHT. I’M HOPING THAT IN CHABAD FACILITIES THE KIDDUSH IS USED AS A VEHICLE FOR A FARBRENGEN WITH CONTENT.AT LEAST DURING THE WINTER MONTHS THIS EXTRAVAGANZA COULD BECOME A WASHING KIDDUSH FOR THE ENTIRE FAMILY AND THERE COULD BE SOME PROGRAMMING THAT WOULD LAST INTO MARRIV. THEN THIS COULD SERVE A VERY POSITIVE PURPOSE.
OY
I’M NOT THE SAME OY AS #4- GUESS I SHOULD HAVE CALLED MYSELF OY2
Andrea Schonberger
Of course people can do exactly as they please with their own money but WHAT IN THE WORLD?!!! This sounds like getting down to party hardy instead of some serious davening. Kiddush–wine, a l’chaim, and a small repast–are all that anyone needs. If you need or want more do and buy it on your own time.
chaim36
Tragic !These rabonim should not have given an interview to these reporters.
ruchel
I am a member of the Shul of Bal Harbour and would like to mention that our Shul and its members send hefty support around the world to the needy. In addition our weekly kiddush feeds many many needy people who would not have a meal on Shabbos. This article is somewhat correct but the message given over is also not correct. Fellow jews, please look at the entirety of each picture, the amount of tzeddaka for example that comes from our community. Are we exhibiting jealous traits? Do we look into what you do with your pocketbooks??
Ben
I’m sorry that some could not see behind the liquor and passed judgement on that. I think that when done properly such places will bring people closer to religion.
men fulgt nisht
direct result of flaunting the gezeira on mashke.
Yikkes
It is not a Kidsesh Hashem to show the world in detail what big fressers we are are. I was once a member of “the Shul” and do understand that their is a need to do things sort of over the top to attract the kind of people who live in Bal Harbour (and the Shul has done many great things including a top notch Kollel). Never the less IMO this is not an article that reflects well on us….
Modesty
As a Lubavitcher this embarrassing. All the years the Rebbee farbrengen he never found it necessary to flaunt a fancy meal at the farbrengen.
Rabbi Lipskaaar you can wear the same hat as the Rebbe but you should copy his modesty.
How can ask people for money (yes you asked me for a donation) after wasting so much money on chumrius and gashmius?
Unfortunately this is not at all an approach that we are learning about now in our shiurei chitas of Tanya. It negates all the teachings of chassidus.
yitz
Many years ago, in the shul I served as Rabbi, I discovered 2 or 3 men sneaking out during the Torah reading. A good friend told me they were starting a kiddush “club”. The next Friday, I peeked around the shul office and found their hidden bottle. I poured it out and filled it with what looked like tea. They did sneak out and came back pretty quickly. My sermon that day was about how people manipulate minds by substituting nice words for uglier ones. I.e., how “abortion” became “reproductive rights” and homosexual” became “gay” etc. Then I moved into the real topic. Lately, “Orthodox alcoholics” has evolved into “kiddush clubs” which I then blasted away at for several minuted. That ended the club for the balance of my decades in the synagogue. Any shul that sponsors a nice kiddush should at least make absolutely sure that the door to the social hall be locked securely until the end of the services!
Milhouse
How about “ganovim” who call themselves “rabbonim”? You openly admit stealing, and even pride yourself on it, and yet you call yourself a rov beyisroel and had the chutzpah to get up and give mussar to your victims?!
Israel Clapman
I’m not impressed at all!!
Big deal that the Shul spends a lousy $1,800.00 for 500 people, I’m involved in a shul where a half decent Kidush is $400.00 for 50 people.
Milhouse
$1800-3600 for 500-800 people is only $3.60 to $4.50 a person. I don’t see why spending that much is anything to be embarrassed about. It seems quite reasonable. Especially since *on average* the people will have smaller lunches because of it.
Avraham Yosef Follick
Once, when Reb Areh was in Lubavitch, the rebbe said to him: “I hear that in Dokshitz they study Chassidus with pannes. Tell me, what connection is there between the teachings of Chassidism and a samovar of panes . . . ?!”
So, when Reb Areh came home, he informed his fellow Dokshitzers that henceforth the after-Shabbat session would be a Chassidus-only affair.
On the following week, the crowd of participants was perceptibly smaller, and it continued to dwindle throughout the winter. When Reb Areh was back in Lubavitch a year later, and the rebbe asked, “What’s doing in Dokshitz?” he was forced to report that the Chassidus class now attracted a fraction of the crowed it had pulled back in its “drink and learn” days.
“Nu,” said the rebbe, “so bring back the pannes. As long as they study Chassidus . . .”
Mendel
Looks at all the chazals that praise anyone who spent an exorbitant amount of money on oneg shabbos. Obviously this goy left this out of his article.
Josh
This outrage is silly. It’s a nice thing for people to be able to socialize a little bit and have a drink. I think some people here would have been happier joining a covent.
Yaakov
When I was a bochur in Lubavitch, I remember having a tremendous respect for the elter chassidim. Notwithstanding the respect, I was, from time to time, surprised at how Lubavitchers could have so little intolerance for anything that was even slightly modern (e.g., certain Jewish music, etc.). I felt that Lubavitchers were the masters of riding the edge of contemporary society, pretending to “fit in,” but in reality being outsiders.
Well, in my “old age” of mid-30’s, I’ve seen the light. Among some of us, the “pretending to fit in” is over. We need to refocus on our task and remember that we need to “pretend to fit in” or at least not koch around in the shtussim so much.
People are looking for Yiddishkeit, they are not looking for us to out-goy the goyim. We need to be ourselves and present a Torah-true picture of Yiddishkeit and give up on this silliness. That’s just one person’s opinion.