‘Torah and Tea’ Taken Up All Over in Honor of Rashi

“Ten minutes before 8 p.m. [on March 11], my wife Rashi sat at the head of the beautifully set dining-room table waiting for women to arrive for her weekly [Tuesday-night] class in our home called ‘Torah and Tea,’ ” writes Rabbi Hirshy Minkowicz, director of Chabad of North Fulton, near Atlanta.

Just before the first guest arrived, Rashi, a 37-year-old mother of eight, went to her room to rest due to a bad headache. She never woke up.

She was buried the next day.

The following Tuesday, the group met again to study and draw strength from their beloved rebbetzin. They were not alone. In well over 150 locations—from Australia to Mexico—“Torah and Teas” are being held and heralded, dedicated in her memory.

Chanala Rubenfeld says she hosted six women in her home in Chesterfield, Mo., where she and her husband direct a Chabad center. The event was modeled on Rashi’s format, where women get together in a homey atmosphere to sip tea, snack on pastries, and connect with each other and their common Jewish heritage.

For her first class, Rubenfeld led six women in a discussion on prayer. Her preparations were based on notes Rashi had prepared for a talk she gave and then shared with her fellow Chabad emissaries through an internal file and idea-sharing system, in which she was an active and valued contributor. In the coming weeks, Rubenfeld plans to shift to the weekly Torah portion as a springboard for conversation and growth.

“I was amazed. The women really connected to Rashi, feeling that she was a living presence in the room as we studied,” says Rubenfeld, who did not know Rashi personally, but benefited from her recipes and programming ideas through mutual acquaintances. “I spoke about Rashi’s life a little bit and read a letter that she had written to her relatives about overcoming tragedy with joy.”

The letter reads (in part): “ … Obviously, we know what we need to do. Somehow we need to transform the energy of our crying into joy because joy is as productive as sadness is destructive. Both require energy … To be joyful in face of unbearable sadness is the hardest challenge of all … We continue to keep their spirit alive by smiling while we are weeping and by continuing to climb the arduous mountains that are put in our way … ”

Tributes Keep Coming

Other communities and individuals are holding various kinds of memorial events. Some women have reported that they have started holding “Torah and (Iced) Tea” with their own families in Rashi’s memory; others have dedicated challah-baking sessions and other Torah-based programs as a tribute.

In Flanders, N.J., Fraida Shusterman, co-director of Chabad of Northwest N.J.­-Western Region, says she will be welcoming women into her home for weekly study sessions. “We have had many women’s events that incorporated cooking and baking, as well as a Torah thought, but this is going to be our first time doing an exclusively Torah-oriented event,” says Shusterman who studied with Rashi at Bais Chaya Mushka Seminary in Montreal. “I sent out an email to 30 women and got an amazing response. Women whom I never thought would come to something like this are planning to attend.”

Back in North Fulton, Ga., Jocelyn Schorvitz says women from the community gathered to share Torah thoughts and “Rashi stories,” to be compiled into a scrapbook they hope to share with the eight Minkowicz children.

“It wasn’t a question in my mind,” says Schorvitz, who collaborated with Rashi on many local events in the 14 years that they knew each other. “We needed to get together. I knew that we would have a ‘Torah and Tea’; the question was just where and how.”

Last week’s class was held in the Chabad center, since the Minkowicz family was still in New York sitting shiva.

Schorvitz notes that she and other women will continue to host “Torah and Tea” at least twice a month, with rotating presenters from throughout the community.

This week’s class, on Tuesday, March 25, will be held in none other than Rashi’s own dining room. It will be led by her mother, Sara Lieberman—a high school teacher, lecturer and mother of 17—picking up where her daughter left off.