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Video: Get-Refuser Thrown Out of Shul

Yechiel Friedman has refused to give his wife a get for nearly 18 years, says the Organization for the Resolution of Agunot (ORA). As a result, a member of ORA forced Friedman out of a minyan at the Yeshiva University synagogue in Manhattan on Tuesday, following the ruling of the Beth Din of America calling to ostracize Friedman until he relents and lets his wife move on.

49 Comments

  • 1. anonymous wrote:

    at least someone who has the gut to tell the truth loud and clear and take action. If fthis would be dfone to all the gangsters of the crown heights community who disguise themselves as respected mashbirim the community would be in a much much better shape.

    • 2. YMSP wrote:

      It’s absolutely shameful for CH.info to be reporting on any of this. I don’t know this case at all. Neither do any of the commentators. Is he holding out for some custody? Did his wife have him arrested or is she impoverishing him with imputed income laws? While it may still be advisable to end it, it’s not his halachic duty in any of those cases (Shulchan Aruch is very clear, unfortunately so for the get-loons crowd). What is clear halacha is that this is halbonas pnei chaveiro and anyone taking part in this loses their chelek in olam haboh, Hashem Yerachem (hopefully their too incompetent to lose theirs – but then why would someone want to join that group).

      I can tell you that the YU “Beth Din of America” issues false seruvim on demand, their “seruvim” aren’t worth the paper they’re printed on and their administrator was recently reported to the FBI for counseling a woman to commit perjury and pursue false arrest, in addition to a racketeering complaint. Not your usual “Bais Din!” They also work with ORA, which is led by Hershel Schachter (the same creep at YU who called for the assassination of Olmert and Netanyahu, G-d forbid). He was taped encouraging a beat-up of a father fighting for a custody share with his daughter.

      There’ve been women who had custody challenged because of their connection to ORA, especially after Schachter’s public maniacal calls to violence.

      But don’t take my word for it. Do 2 minutes of research on your own.

      Supposedly, as Jews, we’re supposed to be governed by the Shulchan Aruch. We definitely had a better society and better people when we were.

      Nothing to do with this case, but it would be hard to count how many workable marriaged the “Beth Din of America” sought to destroy. Yes, why not bring that to Crown Heights?

      Not sure what happened to people who call themselves Lubavitchers but who show blatant disregard for halacha and for basic morality, or who’ve sold their soles for feel good social activism.

      This is truly shameless beyond words.

    • 3. YMSP wrote:

      *souls – Blessedly, they still have their shoes (and I know that certain readers will disregard all true points above and pick at the typo instead).

      As to the true points, if anyone looks and can’t find sources, ask.

  • 5. perfect! wrote:

    there should be a wall of pictures in each shul of which people to not let in. anyone who refuses his ife a get should be on there!

    • 6. same for the women wrote:

      we should have pictures of all women who refuse their husband the right to see their children

  • 9. loshon hara to the max wrote:

    i agree it is wrong of him, but why on earth is crownheights.info reporting this ?

    • 10. agunah of CH wrote:

      because there are “lubavitcher” men who have refused to give their wife a get. And they are still welcome to daven wherever they want. Crown Heights WAKE UP.

  • 11. as if its so simple wrote:

    to just “move on”

    Behind the scenes, as always, the two are deeply entangled in a relationship resembling octopus legs embedded on a spider web. Instead of assisting, all our university educated rabbis, leaders, and professional therapists end up with their profound knowledge remaining behind in the toilet. In reality, in the shul, they throw him out like a dog, like muppets programed by society to quote edicts in the name of a beth din.

    instead of pushing a person out of shul,
    פאק אויף די טלית און תפילין און גיי טו עפעס צו העלפן אן איד

  • 14. mitzvah man wrote:

    He doesn’t count towards a Minyan nor can he Daven in shul until he gives a get.

  • 16. יפיל את עצמו לכבשן האש wrote:

    ואל ילבין פני חבירו ברבים

  • 18. wwc wrote:

    I give respect and hakoras hatov to this Rabbi.
    Anyone who would rob a woman of 19 years of being able to raise a family is a total thief, he held back neshasmas from coming down, and he must have a Personality Disorder to think that he can exercise the power to do this. Very sick mind. We must help our Jewish communities to be aware of Mental health issues, such as Personality disorders. People among us in our communities have it and it is usually not detected until the recipient is suffering in one way or another. Silent suffering. Sorry for those who are afflicted in any way, and pray for this to be eradicated. Moshiach NOW

  • 19. WAY TO GO!!! wrote:

    Bravo!! But it seems this sick individual won’t relent unless he is completely ostracized from all segments of Jewish/communal/social life. Hope he rots in hell.

  • 20. To Rabbi Stern wrote:

    You’re the greatest!!!! I waited 10 years for my get!
    We wish there were many more out there like you to stand up and actually throw him out!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Good on you!!!!

  • 21. Moshe wrote:

    A great Yasherkoach to the one who threw him out.

    P.s I personally think the “rasha” calling was unnessecery, but overall thank you.

    • 22. Brain, turn on wrote:

      So name-calling, unnecessary verbal abuse; but for physical abuse of dragging a man out of synagogue – for that you shout thanks.

    • 23. to brain wrote:

      If it was your daughter who couldn’t remarry because some jerk is ignoring a siruv from Beis Din, you would have done a lot more than just order the bum out of shul. Babies are growing up with no family – no – babies are not being born!!! – because of men like Friedman who roam the streets of CH with impunity while withholding a get for even over 20 years!!!.

  • 24. to WWC wrote:

    before handing out personality disorders as if it were a matter of picking your favorite Sheitel colors with branding labels, the least you could do is educate yourself to learn what exactly makes up a personality disorder. You haven’t shown a single sign, symptom, trait, or description. In fact, you probably know this man’s personal medical history all the way back from his mother’s womb. I’LL bet your husband, children, neighbors, and entire extended family have all sorts of “personality disorders”, based on the bathroom books you took out of the library. The first rule of labeling somebody is that you need evidence. The second rule is that this evidence is nobody’s business (most first year psych residents haven’t yet learnt about this second rule, but hopefully get the idea before a lawsuit teaches them the hard way. The brighter ones eventually learn that the entire basis for “personality disorder” doctrine fed to undergraduates doesn’t even exist, but then with no such a thing they can’t bill insurance, so at that point the ultimate wisdom prevails by raise of hand that these phenomena do in fact exist, paired to a highly sophisticated billing number affixed to the DSM-!V label).

    so, not every girl envied for her sheitel has a personality disorder. And not every man who doesn’t pay his child support has a personality disorder.

    You also accuse this man of stealing “neshassmas”. In your limited world view somebody who doesn’t have children may be the equivalent of a serial rapist because they are outright stealing “neshassmas” from HasChem. If you claim to be familiar with how neshamas wander around up there beyond the confines of Kingston and Albany Avenues, I’d have sufficient evidence that you are not only hallucinogenic, but paranoid schizophrenic scared that somebody is going to steal your neshassmas…

  • 25. Brain, turn on wrote:

    wow these readers simply repeat what they hear. Reuvein video’s Shimon, calling him a rasha, and fifty bystanders clap with the hands cheering him on, without even stoping to think for even less then a second. We are puppets. We copy what we hear.

    You people don’t even stop to think to verify if there is any truth to this. It could be a hoax, and wow how quick these people jump to conclusions! The man in the video might not even be this alleged “Yekeskel”.

    What happened to the organ within our skulls?

  • 26. Shalom Ber wrote:

    I cannot comment on any particular case.
    If however the Beth Din of America issued a Siruf I am confident that they exhausted all other mean to bring a husband to issue a Gett.
    Many times the individuasl suffer from personality disorders.
    Would a wife have married in the first place if she would have known, maybe that point can be utilized to nullify the Kiddushin.
    These are devastating realities for wives as well as children.
    Let us hope that in the case mention a Gett is issue as soon as possible.

  • 28. Shalom Ber wrote:

    if a woman requests a Gett the husband should comply.
    People should not be forced to live with someone they no longer desire.
    Obviously the needs of the children need to be safeguarded.

    • 29. Milhouse wrote:

      That is not the halocho. The halocho is that, except in extraordinary circumstances such as abuse, a marriage can only be dissolved by mutual consent, and if only one party wants to end it they must stay. That is what you agree to when you get married. Nobody is entitled to a get just because they want it; neither a man nor a woman. If someone really wants out, their only option is to persuade their spouse to agree, and if this involves payment then they should pay up.

  • 30. Brain, turn on wrote:

    Shalom Ber, before rushing to retroactively nullify KIDDUSHIN based on the Ezras Nashim’s official diagnoses of “he is a meshugerner,” if these disorders are in fact so common, then have you ever thought about nullifying the imposed GITTIN??????

    I know someone who (someone told me, that someone told him, that he) is autistic. Does his kiddushin count? What about my neighbor, she “has” ADD, her sister herself told me. It would help me to know if her kiddushin didn’t count, this way I could hang out with her and not be concerned about issues of Eishes Ish…

  • 31. To Jeremy Stern: wrote:

    Why did you have to film it and embarrass him in public?This definitely did not help the situation!

  • 34. Let her get the get wrote:

    זבל אנושי חלאת אדם בזיון ובושה
    לכלוא אותו עם שאר פושעים בכלא
    כל כך הרבה שנים של סבל
    אולי אם היו עושים עליו חרם היה זז משהו קודם

  • 35. from rabbi, dr A.J Twersky's book wrote:

    in his book called “”the Shame Borne in Silence” . Or domestic abuse in the jewish community. R. Twersky mentions “without exception, every case of an aguna, every case of a husband’s refusal to give a get will reveal a history of a women having been abused during marriage’/ This last and perhaps ,greatest abuse of power, the refusal to give a get, is used only by individuals who were abusers and who had been either batterers, or tyrannical controllers of their wives”

    • 36. Milhouse wrote:

      If that’s what he claims then he’s full of garbage. Women abuse men just as often as men abuse women.

  • 37. in williamsberg wrote:

    The Satmar Bais Din Hisachdis, doesn’t recognize the Bais Din of America because they r Modern Orthodox & very very very pro the state of Isreal & pro zionist. So maybe not everyone would recognize this siruf especially in most chareidish circles. I’m talking Skver Satmar, Belz, Ger, Eida Hachareidis etc. The bait din of America celebrates Yom HaAtzmaut.

  • 38. 2 sides to every story wrote:

    (1) “beis din of america” is not recognized by almost every single frum beis din. (b4 you start questioning that fact go and ask one!) Children born as a result of gerusim or gittin issued by bda are sofek mamzerim according to most american botei din and are vadai mamzerim according to most Israeli botei din. 
    (2) The man says in the video that his ex wife also has a siruv against her. Maybe that’s true? Don’t be so quick to judge him. Perhaps this “Rabbi” who was mevazer him in public should have verified the facts before jeopardizing his olam habo?!
    (3) ‎There are many lowlife men who withhold a get and Epstein the “cattle proder” was probably right what he did to them. 
    (4) There are also many lowlife woman who lie to get their husbands arrested, withhold children from father’s, go to court instead of beis din: and then come crying to beis din that they are entitled to a get!! These lowlife woman should also be “cattle proded” and never get a get. 
    (5) Throwing someone out of shul because he withheld a get has no basis in halocha. Throwing someone out of shul because they are mesariv beis din should definitely be done and has a basis in halocha. But siruv beis din are also given to people who go to secular court to fight over money, real estate, yerushas and many other things and we don’t “throw these people out of shul”. Some of these people with siruv’s against them are president’s of our shuls!

  • 39. Way to go Rabbi Stern wrote:

    Whoever you are, i dont know you but i applaud ypour actions and taking a stand, as there is communitty watch for pedifiles, maybe a website listing all those who refuse to give a get would be a good service to the jewish community

  • 40. some one wrote:

    you may be right but when a psak din is existing the person is in cherem so you have to act kanoim pogeim boh

  • 41. Bnei Brak wrote:

    To comment # 33 I don’t even think Lakewood holds from the Bais Din of America. The only ppl who hold from them is the Modern Orthodox that’s basically it. 4sure Rav Moshe Landau av beis din of bnei brak & the Eida Hachareidis don’t hold from them.

  • 42. this is horrible wrote:

    how can you judge people like this?
    you never know what kind of mental isusses this guy has, to throw him out of shul like that?
    is this the yiddesher way? grow up!
    enough with all this loshon hara flying back and forth!

  • 43. Anonymous wrote:

    In today’s day and age the courts are very liberal. Custody is expected to be 50/50. If the court is in agreement that the children to not have contact with the father, there is GOOD reason as to why not.
    Also a way that women will protect themselves from not receiving a Get is to also get married civilly. There is a law in New York that part of dissolution of marraige, the husband by Law must give his wife a Get.

  • 44. ORA is a sham! wrote:

    The ORA create many mamzerim with their agressive tactics and maneuvers.
    They are not Frum and could care less about Halacha. Many Rabonim agree that their methods of extreme pressuring and shaming someone until they give a get isrenders the get “coerced” and invalid, thus when the wife remarried her children are mamzerim.

    To those who say “no one” Should ever be able to do this, or “never” should a man withhold a get, or “no women” should have to suffer like this…. You are RADICALS! Stop saying such things! Every case is complicated. Even something as horrible and extreme as Murder has an exception where it’d OK – self defence. There ARE SOME valid and completely legitimate reasons why a man can, indeed should, withhold a Get.

    The ORA is a progressive leftist MO organization that should elicit no respect or legitimacy from out community.
    the Bais Din of America is a MO progressive sham as well, and no other Drum community accepts their legitimacy. Neither should we.

  • 45. Why? wrote:

    Maybe I grew up in liberal America, but maybe someone should shed some light as to WHY a person should be forced to be married to another person? If it’s a custody issue then they should deal with secular court. Why would a sane man want to be married to a woman who does not want to be married to him. I already heard from one such man “she hit me and called me names make her return to me!” Marriage is not a jail cell! Please enlighten me as to why it would be a good idea for a man to withhold a get.

  • 46. to #44 wrote:

    Many Reshonim hold that a forced get is kosher the yeshivas in Lubavitch all over the world r learning gitten this year.

  • 47. mitzvah man2 wrote:

    Be is Din of America is not such a frum mosed. That said it’s good they threw the guy out of shul

  • 48. to comment #43 wrote:

    (1) Have you ever met a father who has had his children taken away from him? Have you ever met children who are desperate to see their father? Withholding a get is often the ONLY answer and usually the only leverage the father may have.
    (2) A get is a halachic ‎jewish document of divorce . If a woman acts in a way that is against halocha: for example going to secular court or having a man falsely arrested, or playing the dirty game of restraining orders: then halachicly she can not obtain a get. It’s often not a matter of the man “withholding it”, halachicly she is simply not entitled to it. It’s the same as somebody eating pork and then going to their Rabbi and asking for it to made kosher! If you are uncomfortable with that reality then switch religions or join the FOR PROFIT gangsters of Ora who…just like reform…or beth din of america…seek to change halacha to suit their own agenda
    (3) ‎It should be noted that the issue of get refusal is not a one way street;‎‎ A study of the Chief Rabbinate of Israel in 2007 found that in the prior two years 180 woman were refused divorces by their husbands, but a full 185 men were refused a get from their wives.

  • 49. great job but not so great words wrote:

    the rabbi has a point i can imagine what the wife feels like it could be that im 10 but imagine living with somone that you hate and that person is just bothering you but on the other hand i would be very embarressed if somebody would call me a rasha

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