Becoming Friends Through the Friendship Circle

When Jenna Kress, 16, first met Danielle Orleans, 9, she had to stay on the other side of the room for a visit that lasted about 15 minutes. Fast forward three years later, Jenna continues to visit Danielle, who is high functioning on the Autism spectrum, every single Sunday, staying for hours to read, write, cook and bake with the little girl who has allowed her to not only come close in physical proximity, but in her heart, as well.

Jenna was introduced to Danielle through the Friendship Circle, an organization based in Potomac that pairs children with special needs with teen volunteers in the community. Brought to the area in 2007 by Chana and Mendel Kaplan, the Friendship Circle serves more than 100 families in the area and employs roughly 150 teen volunteers.

“Life is about community and helping people in need,” said Rabbi Mendel Kaplan. “We wanted to find a way to help the people of the special needs community, who tend to get looked over, and wanted to be impactful.”

Despite initial resistance from Danielle’s parents, Linda and Michael Orleans, Chana Kaplan persisted in wanting to have Jenna be Danielle’s buddy, a term used to describe the teen volunteers in the organization.

“I kept trying because I felt that I knew both of them and I knew that even though Danielle had challenges with people, she needed a friend because at the end of the day everyone needs a friend,” she said. “I knew that Jenna would understand that it wasn’t going to be a typical relationship to begin with, but I trusted it.”

For six visits after that initial meeting, Jenna stayed about six feet away from Danielle.

Orleans remembers the day when she heard her daughter say “Jenna, come close,” and watched as the little girl who has extreme anxiety when others are near her, allowed Jenna to come close to her, so she could apply make up to her buddy’s face.

“I think we were almost in tears, it was so amazing,” she said. “No one else was able to get that close to Danielle, there was a trust there that she had with Jenna.”

“I was in shock that she felt comfortable enough to come that close to me, and it just made me realize the progress that I have made with her,” said Jenna, who is the n’siah (president) of Ahava BBG and incoming n’siah of D.C. Council BBG. “I felt like wow I really am her friend, and I really am a person that she sees as being safe in her life. It was such a great feeling.”

Jenna, who described her relationship with Danielle as “shaping her life,” explained that the Friendship Circle is so important because, “it provides people with special needs with something so simple which is friendship. It has given me the opportunity to provide joy in another person’s life, and my relationship with Danielle is one of the most special relationships I’ve ever had in my entire life.”

Orleans described Jenna as “another member of our family. It’s the biggest gift we can give to our children to get a buddy like Jenna, who just gets them. She has helped Danielle developmentally but has also allowed her to feel so connected. It’s been life changing.”

Although Jenna, who will become a senior at Walt Whitman High School in Bethesda next fall, will eventually head off to college, she explained that she will never truly leave Danielle.

“I’m not worried for Danielle because she’ll be okay, but I feel bad leaving the friendship that we made. I am by no means leaving her, even when I’m not in the Friendship Circle anymore, I’ll still be her friend because of the Friendship Circle.”