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NY Times Magazine

Readers of the New York Times magazine were surprised today to find a photo soon-to-be married Chabad couple, Tomer Weingarten and Rochel Wiener, gracing its pages. In a section called 'What They Were Thinking,' the magazine posted a Black and white photo of Tomer and Rochel in the Ohel as they were about to be engaged under the title: 'Seeking a Marital Blessing,' along with a quote from each.

NY Times Mag Features Lubavitch Couple in the Ohel

NY Times Magazine

Readers of the New York Times magazine were surprised today to find a photo soon-to-be married Chabad couple, Tomer Weingarten and Rochel Wiener, gracing its pages. In a section called ‘What They Were Thinking,’ the magazine posted a Black and white photo of Tomer and Rochel in the Ohel as they were about to be engaged under the title: ‘Seeking a Marital Blessing,’ along with a quote from each.

TOMMER WEINGARTEN (RIGHT), 22: It’s a custom that before you announce your engagement, you first go to the rebbe and you ask for his blessing. You ask him to deliver your prayers on high, that they should be heard by God and answered speedily. So we went to the ohel. It’s the grave of our rebbe, the Lubavitcher rebbe. And my arm was in a sling, because I fell off my longboard and broke my collarbone. I’m into skateboarding. My friends set me up with Rochel. It’s called a shidduch. I’m excited to get married more than ever. I’ll be honest, I didn’t see myself getting married this young, but when you find the right one, if you wait too long, she might run away. I don’t want to be that guy who looks back at his life and says, ‘‘You know, there was that one girl. . . .’’

ROCHEL WIENER, 23: We dated for about three months before we got engaged. Basically you date for however long you need to decide if you want to marry the person. Usually it’s a very short period of time, in part because, according to the Torah, we abstain from touching before marriage. Without physical contact, you can really see who the person is intellectually, without a lot of emotional interference. Once you realize the person you are dating is the other half of your soul, you go to the ohel to pray, and then you plan your wedding as quickly as you can. We’re getting married on Sept. 18.

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21 Comments

  • Ohel Visitor

    Is there an aprrpriate way to dress for going to the Ohel?

    Tznius squad: we need you input.

  • Tachliss

    Positive food for the shidduch nay-sayers.

    Rochel in particular, answered very well for the NYT.

    For the unmarried, her 3 months or as much as you need to decide, beggars the question: If you don’t know, how do you decide that time will be useful? You may be open to a stretched run for no reason.

    Iremember Reb Shloma Chayim (mashpiya iLod-Kfar Chabad) saying to a somewhat modern American bochur (who was shlepping around in that 3 month syndrome, when it was pretty clear where his feeling were) “Genug shoyn zich arumdreyen mit dayn kallah.” With a smile of course.

    Tachliss: Get a mashpiya if you don’t have a parent (just joint biological gene-donors, who are good friends, but too timid to be a real parent.)

  • motti

    #7 – what is wrong with how they are dressed? Unless you are suggesting he tuck his shirt in.
    It’s Ellul. Look at yourself. Why did you have to be the only negative comment

  • To # 7

    what does that mean? She’s wearing sleeves way down her arms past the elbows,her shirt goes completely up to her neck all around, a skirt. He’s wearing a hat and jacket and a white shirt. Probably prefers not to have needed the sling for his broken collarbone!

    What imput do you need from the tznius squad?

  • Kiddush Shem Shomayim

    The kallah’s father, Rabbi Moshe Wiener, wrote the authoritative halacha sefer on tznius “Kvuda Bas Melech” regarding which the Rebbe wrote “chaval al kol yom shmisakeves krias v’limud sefer zeh” — so we certainly should assume that however she dresses is according to the highest standards of tznius !

  • to all who misunderstood #7:

    I understood #7 to be asking what clothes are appropriate for them to wear to ohel, possible because they have never been and don’t know. I highly doubt they were negatively critiquing the way the couple is dressed

  • GO TOMMMER!

    Tomer is prbly the COOOOLEST chossid out there!!!!!!!! Go MAN GO! U guys will be the most rockin couple in chabad

  • Clarity

    To #7

    Are you suggesting they were too informally dressed? That they would not have gone to Dollars in that style?