Weekly Story: Rabbeinu Tams’ Tefillin
by Rabbi Sholom DovBer Avtzon
Posted L’zechus the Bar Mitzvah bochur, Menachem Mendel ben Devorah Leah
Recently at one of Rabbi Nissan Mangel’s weekly Shabbos farbrengens he mentioned that in 5713 or 5714, when he was still a bochur (student) in the yeshiva in Montreal, during a yechidus, the Rebbe asked him, Nissan, do you put on Rabbeinu Tams’ tefillin?
No, was my response, and then I asked, “The Rebbe feels that I should?”
Yes, the Rebbe replied.
When I heard him mention this at the farbrengen, I began to wonder when did it become the norm for the bochurim in Lubavitch to put on Rabbeinu Toms’ tefillin at 18? As it was obvious to me that contrary to what I thought that it was always the custom. Evidently it used to be that we began wearing Rabbeinu Toms when we got married, just as other chassidim do.[1]
My proof to that conclusion was that at that time Rabbi Mangel was older than 18 and it didn’t dawn on him or the Hanhala to encourage him to begin wearing Rabbeinu Tams.
So I began asking elder chassidim and I am presenting here the preliminary results of my research that is not yet complete, with the hope that some of the readers would help me with additional details.
As always, your feedback and comments are greatly appreciated and most welcomed.
We all know that during the farbrengen on Purim 5736 (1976), the Rebbe stated that from now on, no one should ask him anymore about whether they should begin putting on Rabbeinu Toms, as every boy should begin putting them on from their Bar mitzvah.[2] The only condition is that they have their own pair, so this way they would be able to put it on every day.
I spoke to numerous people and while I still did not come to complete clarity I figured I would put this out for everyone to read and perhaps some of you will be able to fill in the gaps.
Doing the 7 Days of shiva after the histalkus of the Frierdiker Rebbe on Yud Shevat 5710 (1950), the Rebbe stated that he doesn’t understand why the custom is to put on the Rabbeinu Toms only when one gets married, he noted that people should start putting it on earlier, meaning at 18. [If anyone was 18 then, by now they would be 95, so we don’t have that many people to ask exactly how fast it became the norm, so I spoke to people in the mid-80s and high seventies to find out their recollections.] So far this is the information that I have.
Based on what Rabbi Mangel mentioned, that at that time, when he was in Montreal, he doesn’t remember any other student in the Yeshiva who was putting on Rabbeinu Toms, it seems that the custom didn’t gain any traction for a few years. In other words, at least in Montreal the custom did not become a custom until some years later.
However, speaking to those who were students in 770 around 5720 (around a decade after the Frierdiker Rebbe’s histalkus) or a few years earlier or later, a different scenario comes to light. There were those that did put on Rabbeinu Toms at that time, and there were others that didn’t. However, no one was supposed to begin putting on Rabbeinu Toms without first receiving permission from the Rebbe.
The normal way the bochur asked was when he entered the Rebbe’s room for a yechidus before his yom holedes (birthday) and included in the note that he would give the Rebbe was the question of whether he should put on Rabbein Toms or not.
If one couldn’t obtain his own pair (or at least be positive that there is a pair available for him to use every day) the answer was no, and swiftly it became known not to ask until that criteria is taken care of.[3] To some the Rebbe said yes, to others he stipulated certain conditions. Many people told me that the Rebbe asked them, or their friends how often do they go to the mikva.
One person who was asked this in his yechidus understood that toiviling in the mikva was a requirement and he replied, from now on I accept upon myself to go every day. Another person told me that he replied that he goes on Monday, Thursday and Shabbos and then in reply to the Rebbe’s question about erev shabbos, he clarified that when he said Shabbos, he also meant erev Shabbos.
To some the Rebbe stressed that you realize it is a commitment for life just like Rashi.[4]
Others told me that the Rebbe gave them permission without asking them any questions, while others told me that their condition was to add in learning Chassidus and to some the Rebbe specified which Maamorim they are to learn.[5]
But interesting enough, some people told me that they didn’t ask and began putting it on at their wedding.[6] Additionally, to some who asked, even if they regularly went to the mikva and learned Chassidus, the Rebbe’s reply was not to, and they waited until their chassunah.
One person told me, it was a few months after he became 18 and he wrote to the Rebbe that he is going to be learning in Kfar Chabad, and he added that he had just checked his tefillin and a letter was cracked. Although he immediately obtained a new pair of tefillin, his question was what should he do to rectify the fact that for some time his tefillin were possul (invalid), and subsequently he missed who knows how many days of putting on kosher tefillin.
The Rebbe response was, being that you are going to Eretz Yisroel which is holier than your home country, you too should become holier. Therefore, it is proper that you should begin wearing Rabbeinu Tams.[7]
I also heard that a bochur wrote to the Rebbe (in the chof’s 60’s) that he missed one day of putting on Rabbeinu Tams tefillin, and the Rebbe responded with the question of who instructed you to put on Rabbeinu Toms? [Evidently this bochur put it on without asking.]
In 5726 (1926), a few months before the summer the Rebbe told a bochur, Yes you should, but being that you travel often, you should wait until you are sure that you have a pair at your disposal every day. As once you begin to put them on, it becomes the same mitzva and obligation as Rashi’s. Furthermore, you should publicize this.
He said that he realized that the Rebbe was anticipating a problem that could arise in the summer. During the summer numerous students go out on Merkos Shlichus to various cities, towns and farmland to visit the Jews living there and uplift them.
The problem may be that some students were borrowing the Rabbeinu Toms of their friends, so by the summer they either had to obtain their own pair or join with a bochur that had his own pair.
But some who are around 75 told me that at that time around 5731, being that everyone was getting permission without any questions or conditions, they understood that this is what the Rebbe wants, so why should they waste the Rebbe’s time and ask, so they just began putting it on, on their own.
However, not everyone waited until they were eighteen to ask, a few asked around their bar mitzvah, and many especially bochurim in Eretz Yisroel were encouraged by their mashpiim to ask at sixteen and some even at fifteen,
However, they demanded from the students a certain commitment or even an accomplishment in order to have their permission to ask the Rebbe. For example, Reb Nissin Nemenov allowed the students in France to ask at 15 or 16, only after they had mastered the first twelve chapters of Tanya and the Introduction by heart.
However, this wasn’t limited to Eretz Yisroel and France, I was told by a student of Oholei Torah that in 5732 his mashpia gave him permission to ask the Rebbe at his 15th birthday, and the Rebbe replied Yes. Evidently the Rebbe was slowly implementing the point that it should be begin together with Rashi’s at the age of 13.
Being that we mentioned in the beginning of the article about the sicha on Purim 5736, it is interesting to note, one of my friends, his birthday is Shushan Purim and that year he was turning 18, and he received an answer from the Rebbe a few days before Purim to begin putting on Rabbeinu Toms on his birthday.
While Rabbi Leibel Schapiro sheyichye, told me that from around Rosh Chodesh Adar on many boys did not receive a reply from the Rebbe concerning putting on Rabbeinu Toms and they as well as the hanahalah were perplexed as to why the Rebbe was not responding.
But after that Sicha, everything was understood, as the Rebbe wanted everyone to do so from their bar mitzvah on.[8]
Rabbi Daniel Goldberg told me, that in the shul he grew up in, in England there was a Kopuster chossid. He once quipped, I don’t know why you Lubavitchers wait until you are 18 to wear Rabbeinu Toms. In Kopust, the custom was that a bar mitzvah boy received both pairs of tefillin before his Bar Mitzvah.
When I was about to post this article, I met Rabbi Herschel Morosov, and he told me that before his Bar Mitzvah, his father Reb Mendel a”h asked him if he wants to put on Rabbeinu Toms also, explaining that that is what his father the chossid and Mazkir Reb Chonya (Elchonon Dov) hy”d told him to do at his bar mitzvah.
[Author’s note: We can perhaps derive from this, that this was the minhag at least in Beis HaRav and perhaps even more widespread among some chassidim.]
Herschel continued, I replied, “I will follow the general custom of asking the Rebbe before my eighteenth birthday.”
A Taste of Chassidus L’huvin… Yufeh Shu’uh Achos B’Teshuva Umaasim Tovim Torah Ohr 16A
In this maamar the Alter Rebbe is coming to explain the deeper meaning of Buh BaYumim (well on in his years). The possuk begins by stating, “And Avrohom was old, well on in his years.”
Seemingly the last few words are a repetition of the first words that Avrohom was old. So The Alter Rebbe explains that the words “Avrohom was old”, is referring to the spiritual level he attained, while “well in his years” is informing us that he had also acquired certain spiritual garments.
And the main concept of this maamar is explaining what those garments are needed for, or in other words, what they accomplish.
He begins, our sages state that one moment of Teshuva and fulfilling Mitzvos is better than the entire world to come. The question on this is, being that in the world to come every person receives their rewards for their accomplishments in this world, how can we say at the same time that the preparations done to merit Gan Eden are greater than Gan Eden?
He explains that there are different levels of Hashem’s Shchina. In one possuk it says מלא כל העולם כבודו – that the whole world is full of His glory. From this one can infer that the world is full of His glory but not of His essence. Yet, another possuk says, את השמים ואת הארץ אני מלא – My presence fills up the heavens and earth, meaning my essence fills it up, and not just My glory.
So the question is, what is revealed in the Earth and Heavens, is it Hashem’s essence or is it just His glory?
The explanation is, Hashem’s essence is not revealed in the physical world. The reason for this is, for then the world would feel His presence and will be completely nullified, and Hashem wants it to have the ability to feel that it is independent of Him. So, Hashem concealed His essence and left only His glory be revealed and seen.
But Hashem’s greatness is not in the fact that He created the world, as Hashem is much greater than that. Rather, His greatness is that He concealed His essence and lowered Himself so that one can find or see Him in such a miniscule aspect of His essence as we exclaimed “How vast are Your creations (ma’aseicha), Hashem, of being involved in creating the world. Subsequently, if we see how great Hashem is, by looking at His creation of the world, how much more so is the greatness of Hashem’s essence.
In simple terms, here in the physical world we only could see the effect of Hashem, how He gives life to everything, but in Gan Eden, the essence of His glory is revealed, not just of what it can accomplish.
This brings us to the question of how could a Neshoma, who although is connected to Hashem’s essence which is unlimited, yet being that it descended in a limited form, how can it understand when it is in Gan Eden Hashem’s essence, which is unlimited?
Chassidus explains that when one thing connects or unites two things it has to have the property of both of them. [An aspect of the higher one, and an aspect of the lower one.] So here too, for the Neshoma, which came down and became part of this physical world, in order for it to understand Hashem’s essence, it has to have something that is both physical and spiritual (limited and unlimited). And those are the garments that Teshuva and good deeds create every day.
On one hand, the mitzvos are given physical parameters: certain mitzvos are able to be fulfilled only in a specific time, others in a specific place, or other physical requirements, such as size. so that is how they are connected to this world.
Yet, at the same time Mitzvos are the will of Hashem, and as is known, He and His will are one and the same. That demonstrates that they are unlimited and are connected to Hashem’s essence.
Subsequently only through fulfilling Hashem’s mitzvos on a daily basis, does the Neshoma attain the garments that these mitzvos form, and those garments which are essentially unlimited and G-dly, allow the Neshoma, which was sent down in a finite form to be able to comprehend the infinite and essence of Hashem’s glory in Gan Eden.
Because essentially, they are on an even higher level than the essence of Hashem’s glory that is revealed in Gan Eden. As anything that is revealed, is not the essence of the thing, and mitzvos are part of Hashem’s essence.
So being that they are higher than the essence in Gan Eden, so therefore the neshoma of a person who is limited is able to truly comprehend it, as the Neshoma fulfilled mitzvos, which are higher than the revelation that is in Gan Eden.
Rabbi Avtzon is a veteran mechanech and the author of numerous books on the Rebbeiim and their chassidim. He is available to farbreng in your community and can be contacted at avtzonbooks@gmail.com.
[1] As I continued this research, I believe that perhaps they used to put it on earlier, but because of the difficulties at that time (Communism etc.), it was decided to delay it until the wedding.
[2] Sometime later, in a letter from the Rebbe it was clear that the Rebbe was saying that they should begin to wear it before their Bar Mitzvah. Originally it was thought that they should begin a month before the bar mitzvah, when the boy says the brocha on donning tefillin, and then it was clarified that the Rebbe meant to it one, at the same time as the boy begins to put it on when he begins donning Rashi’s.
[3] Based on this, I believe this is the reason why many students whose parents were not from Montreal, did not ask, as they felt that their parents wouldn’t buy them one.
Years ago, Rabbi Simcha Bunim Pikarski related, that he didn’t ask, however, the Rebbe brought it up on his own, asking him if he is putting them on. He replied, “No, because he believes that his father, [the Rosh Hayeshiva of 770,] would want him to follow his chassidishe custom of waiting until his wedding.”
The Rebbe instructed him to discuss it with his father, and when he heard it was coming from the Rebbe he immediately replied that he should begin that day.
[4] One person told me that the Rebbe told him in the Yechidus, it is a proper think, but you should put it on just like Rashi’s. Being that the Rebbe did not note, which means every day, he understands it that it should be put on in the morning immediately after Shacharis.
Author’s note: The benefit of putting it on immediately after Shacharis is twofold: A. There is no possibility that you might forget or be stuck later on in a place that you cannot obtain a Rabbeinu Toms tefillin. B. That this way it is as if you made a brocha on them, since it is put on immediately after you remove Rashi’s.
[5] I am not able to say that there were stages in the Rebbe’s reply, as some of the people are the same age, yet they received different answers in Yechidus.
However, I do think that in the lameds (1970’s), the Rebbe told everyone yes, as no one who began putting it on in those years told me that they know of someone who was told them not to.
[6] I found out that even that wasn’t carved in stone. As one person told me that his father, who learned in the underground chadorim in Russia, began putting on Raibbeinu Toms’ only a few years after his marriage.
[7] In general many people who wrote this question to the Rebbe, the Rebbe replied that from now on you should be more careful in Tefillin, and you should learn the halachos of Tefillin thoroughly. To others the Rebbe instructed that they learn a maamor (or maamorim) that discuss the concept of Tefillin, while others were instructed to learn maamorim that discuss the significance and meaning between Rashi and Rabbeinu Toms tefillin.
[8] I heard (not from one of his descendants or family members) that he was at a bar mitzvah where Rabbi Sholom Ber Gordon said to one of his grandsons, I am jealous of you, as you are greater than I. When I was bar mitzvah, I was not allowed to wear Rabbeinu Toms. And even when I was older and allowed to, we all had to ask permission, and the Rebbe gave to many conditions.
Yet you are on a level that the Rebbe says, put it on at your bar mitzvah, without conditions!
[Author’s note: While this is true, many add that this doesn’t mean that a bar mitzvah bochur shouldn’t adhere to the conditions that the Rebbe gave to many. Just as everyone understands that this is a life-time commitment, so too the aspect of going to the mikva, etc. should also be fulfilled.
Rather it means that the Rebbe trusts you that you will do so even without being instructed personally to do so.]
